Paul Howley's Story

Part 175

2009-12-07T09:06:00.001-08:00

Part 175

“Ob-la-di, ob-la-da.”

After the memorial service, my sister Sharon and her husband Greg invited family and a small group of our friends back to their home. I don’t remember much of what went on there, but I know we were glad to share this time with this group of people. After everyone had left, we eventually had to go home and begin our life without Adam.

We still had an abundance of food that was prepared for us by friends and members of our church and that’s what we ate for several days. We invited some of our closest friends over to help us eat up the remaining food but we eventually needed additional items from our local grocery store. I went by myself to do a quick shopping but as I went down each row I was overwhelmed with memories of Adam. His favorite breakfast cereals. Fruits and yogurts. Cheeses. Lots of cheeses. When I got to the juice aisle I saw the individual small cans of V-8 vegetable juice and remembered when we used to buy the large container and fill Adam’s thermos each day for his school lunch because it was cheaper than the small cans. I know this probably seems silly, but this memory was too much for me. I needed to get out of the grocery store right away before I totally broke down. I left the cart, full of food, right there in the aisle and rushed home.

When I was a kid, my father taught me that happiness in this life is mostly about our attitude. We can choose to be miserable or make the best out of our situation. I didn’t want to be miserable but losing Adam seemed overwhelming. It seemed like no amount of positive, wishful thinking could make me truly happy again. But I needed to try. I needed to be strong for my wife. I needed to be strong for my daughter.

I was fortunate that I was allowed to be a school board member at Cassy’s school. It gave me something to do that seemed worthwhile and it filled up lots of my time. The students, staff, and teachers were very caring people who were instrumental to my healing process. Spending time at the school with Debbie Monnell, Roger Allen, Brenda Carney, Belinda Simpson, and Jim Morel and others, gave me another purpose and reason to try to function normally. But my “normal” was now going to be very different for me. It’s hard to explain.

Mal spent many of her days with Liz Verhoeks at Liz’s “Laconia Pottery” store. Mal had been teaching rubberstamp card making classes at the store for a while but she wasn’t up to socializing with strangers so she decided to take some time off.

We were invited out for lunch one day with a couple we knew. Both are very nice people who wanted to comfort us. But at one point during our lunch, the wife (trying to empathize with our pain) explained how much she misses her oldest daughter. She said that there are times that she missed her so much that she’d wear one of her daughter’s sweaters just to feel close to her. We understood what our friend was trying to communicate but it just didn’t work. Her daughter was attending college about two hours away. Our friend could see or talk to her daughter anytime she wanted. Our son was gone.

Cassy’s life was very busy. She had lots going on at school with sports, studies and the upcoming school play. She felt the need to dive right back into school as soon as possible. I still remember the sick feeling I had as I watched her drive off to school on her first day back.

Right after Adam’s accident, Cassy’s old boyfriend, John, begged her to break-up with her current boyfriend. John assured Cassy that he regretted previously breaking up with her and that he wanted to “be there” for her in her time of pain and sorrow. We encouraged Cassy to seriously consider this before she did anything. It’s not a good idea to make important decisions while you are very emotional. She said she understood but she was determined to get back together with John. It didn’t take very long for the “real” John to come back and he broke her heart again. This is not what Cassy needed right now.

Mal had a growing urge to do something to help Adam’s friends from the park in Newport, Rhode Island. She wanted the “Park Rats” to know more about Adam and explain why he loved them. She discussed this desire with church members Ron and Christine St. Cyr.

Next chapter: Our church makes a plan.

Part 174

2009-12-07T09:05:00.001-08:00

Part 174

“The Memorial Service for Adam Dean Howley”

We opened up the memorial service for anyone to share their thoughts about Adam and several of his long-time friends and co-workers came up to speak.

James Gray recalled that he always enjoyed playing with Adam when they were kids. One day when James went to Lexington Christian Academy he was bullied by an older student and Adam stuck up for him. Adam’s love of other people inspired James to work with young people. A co-worker from “Friendly’s” explained that Adam was not only a good worker, but a good friend. Even though Adam was very busy getting ready to leave for college, he took the time to go to the assistant manager’s home to try to help her fix her computer. She appreciated his unselfishness. Adam’s friend Phil Doreau (wearing the bright blue satin suit that matched the purple suit that he and Adam wore to their high school prom) told a funny story about hiding in the basement of our Massachusetts home for two days without us even knowing he was there. Adam snuck pork chops and other food down to him by hiding the food in his pockets!

I don’t remember if any other friends or family got up to speak, but after a few minutes went by, a young 17-year old girl from Rhode Island slowly walked to the front of the room. She wore brightly colored clothes and her hair was dyed a bright purple. She explained that her father had died when she was only 15. For the next two years she wore all black clothes and her hair had been dyed black. Then she met Adam. Adam’s love of people and his love of life brought “colors” back to her life.

Another Rhode Island boy, who spoke with a heavy speech impediment, explained that almost everyone made fun of him and many people thought he was mentally retarded. But things changed when he met Adam. Adam wouldn’t allow anyone to tease him anymore. His life was better because of Adam.

One of Adam’s favorite Rhode Island friends, Victor, explained that he used to be a violent kid, picking fights and releasing his rage on anyone who crossed him. Adam taught him to love and to be more patient.

I was grateful to hear that Adam had a positive effect on his friends and co-workers.

To wrap up the time of sharing, Adam’s Uncle Greg Demund and Adam’s cousin Emily came up front. Greg read a poem he wrote for the service:

“Six weeks premature Adam was born,

Bright blond hair his head did adorn.

He beat his cousin Em by just three weeks,

So the race was on, their lives to compete.

Whatever the task, or the race may be,

The two fought fiercely the winner to see.

Tricycle races were a major event,

Adam beating Emily with as fast as he went.

Report card grades were always there,

Each one comparing so as to be fair.

Adam never liked that Emily was taller,

But consoled in the fact that Cassy was smaller.

High School graduation finally did arrive,

Emily graduated first to Adam’s despise.

Two knives were used to cut their cake,

Adam cut first, this prize he did take.

Adam was a joy for all to see,

A smile on his face and wild shoes had he.

He could dance, and he would sing,

The world was his stage, always performing.

In musicals and plays he was at home,

The theatre he loved as his life has shown.

Paul and Mal watched with great delight,

As Adam performed in a play just right.

Red, yellow, green and purple hair had he,

The rainbow every week we did see.

Now through Heaven’s gate he has gone,

One last race he beat Emily on.

In the presence of the Lord he may stand,

Dance Adam dance, as only you can.

Stand at the feet of the King most high,

With your hair aglow and your hands raised high.

Sing with the angels your praises join in,

Although a Frank Sinatra tune is not a good hymn.

And when the Lord our God finally looks down,

He may truly wonder when he created a red crown.”

Emily read a section of a book titled, “A Gentle Thunder” by Max Lucado:

“Don’t let your heart be troubled. Trust in God, and trust in me. There are many rooms in my Father’s house; I would not tell you this if it were not true. After I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me so that you may be where I am. (John 14:1-4)

“What kind of statement is that? Trust me with your death. When you face the tomb, don’t be troubled—trust me! You get the impression that to God the grave is a no-brainer. He speaks as casually as the mechanic who says to a worried client, “Sure, the engine needs an overhaul, but don’t worry. I can do it.” For us it’s an ordeal. For him it’s no big deal.

“The other night I did something that every parent has done dozens of times. I carried my daughter to bed. Five-year-old Sara fell asleep on the floor, and I picked her up, carried her up the stairs, and put her in bed. Why? I knew it was time for her to rest, and I knew that rest was better up there than down here.

“Doesn’t God do the same? Doesn’t he, knowing more than we, carry us to the place of rest he created? For God, death is no tragedy. In God’s economy, the termination of the body is the beginning of life.

“Can you imagine if Sara’s sisters objected to my decision to carry her upstairs? “Don’t take her. We’ll miss her. Please keep her here so we will all be together.”

“How would I answer? “Oh, but she’ll rest so much better in the room I have prepared for her. Besides, you’ll be coming up yourselves soon.”

“By calling us home, God is doing what any father would do. He is providing a better place to rest. A place he has “prepared for us.” Heaven is not mass-produced; it is tailor-made.

“Sometime ago I indulged and ordered two shirts from a tailor. I selected the cloth. The tailor measured my body. And several weeks later, I received two shirts made especially for me. There is a big difference between these two shirts and the other shirts in my closet. The tailored shirts were made with me in mind. The other shirts were made for any hundred thousand or so males my size. But not these two. They were made just for me.

“As a result, they fit! They don’t bulge. They don’t choke. They are just right. Such is the promise of heaven. It was made for us in mind. Elsewhere Jesus invites us to ‘receive the kingdom God has prepared for you since the world was made.’ (Matthew 25:34)

“The problem with this world is that it doesn’t fit. Oh, it will do for now, but it isn’t tailor-made. We were made to live with God, but on earth we live by faith. We were made to live forever, but on this earth we live but for a moment. We were made to live holy lives, but this world is stained by sin.

“This world wears like a borrowed shirt. Heaven, however, will fit like one tailor-made.

“By the way, I’ve often thought it curious how few people Jesus raised from the dead. He healed hundreds and fed thousands, but as far as we know he only raised three: the daughter of Jairus, the boy near Nain, and Lazarus. Why so few? Could it be because he knew he’d be doing them no favors? Could it be because he couldn’t get any volunteers? Could it be that once someone is in heaven, the last place they want to return to is here?

“We must trust God. We must trust not only that he does what is best but that he knows what is ahead. Ponder these words of Isaiah 57:1-2: ‘The good men perish; the godly die before their time and no one seems to care or ponder why. No one seems to realize that God is taking them away from the evil days ahead. For the godly who die shall rest in peace.’

“My, what a thought. God is taking them away from the evil days ahead. Could death be God’s grace? Could the funeral wreath be God’s safety ring? Why does an eight-year-old die of cancer? Why is a young mother taken from her children? As horrible as the grave may be, could it be God’s protection from the future? Trust in God, Jesus urges, and trust in me.”

Mal’s sister Madeline got up to introduce a special song. She said:

“About six months ago, my sister played the following song for her friend. She explained that her plan was to record this song on a cassette and tape it to Adam’s steering wheel in his car. The note attached would read: “Adam, this is to be the song we dance to at your wedding, Love, Mom”

“Although this event will not happen here on Earth, someday there will be a dance in Between Mal and Adam.” (to hear this song, please click on the link below)

http://tinyurl.com/kimhill2

For those of you who are unable to click on the above link, here are the lyrics to this song:

Up To The Moon

I love you up to the moon,
And I love you big as the sky,
I love to watch you when you sleep,
I love to hold you when you cry,
One day when you’re older and
Taller than me,
I’ll say I watched you grow
Like a beautiful tree.
I love you up to the moon,
And I love you big as the sky,
You’ll always be my little man,
I love you the best that a mama can.
And one day if you rise up and
Call me blessed,
I’ll say it was a joy to give you my best.
‘Cause I love you up to the moon,
I love you big as the sky,
I love you up to the moon,
Love you up to the moon.

We closed the memorial service with an emotional song by Kathy Troccoli titled, “Goodbye For Now.”

Here are the lyrics:

Goodbye for Now

I can’t believe that you’re really gone now,

Seems like it’s all just a dream.

How can it be that the world will go on,

When something has died within me.

Leaves will turn. My heart will burn

With colors of you.

Snow will fall, But I’ll recall your warmth.

Summer wind, breathing in your memory.

I’ll miss you.

But there will be a time,

When I’ll see your face,

And I’ll hear your voice,

And there we will laugh again.

And there will come a day,

When I’ll hold you close,

No more tears to cry,

‘cause we’ll have forever,

but I’ll say goodbye for now.

I can’t imagine my life without you.

You held a place all your own.

Just knowing you were beneath the same sky,

Oh, what I joy I have known.

On rainy days, in many ways,

You’ll water my heart.

On starry nights I’ll glimpse the light,

Of your smile.

Never far from my heart,

You’ll stay with me.

So I’ll wait.

And there will be a time,

When I’ll see your face,

And I’ll hear your voice,

And there we will laugh again.

And there will come a day,

When I’ll hold you close,

No more tears to cry,

‘cause we’ll have forever,

but I’ll say goodbye for now.

Click here to hear the song:

http://tinyurl.com/goodbyefornow3

As this song ended, Adam’s casket was carried out to a waiting vehicle, which would deliver the casket to a storage facility until the frozen ground could be opened for his burial in June. The afternoon sky was a brilliant red color as we watched the hearse drive away.

Part 173

2009-12-07T09:01:00.001-08:00

Part 173

Pastor Jim Morel opened the memorial service for our son Adam with a prayer and then Mal's sister Carol sang a song (written by an old friend of ours, Lawrence Chewning) titled, "The Anchor Holds."

I have journeyed through the long dark night out on the open sea
By faith alone, sight unknown, and yet His eyes were watching me.

The anchor holds, though the ship is battered.
The anchor holds, though the sails are torn
I have fallen on my knees as I faced the raging seas.
The anchor holds in spite of the storm.

I've had visions. I've had dreams.
I've even held them in my hand.
But I never knew they would slip right through
Like they were only grains of sand.

I've been young but I am older now
and there has been beauty these eyes have seen
But it was in the night, through the storms of my life,
Oh, that’s where God proved his love to me.

The anchor holds, though the ship is battered.
The anchor holds, though the sails are torn.
I have fallen on my knees as I faced the raging seas.
The anchor holds in spite of the storm.

This song meant a lot to us. We would need to rely on our faith to survive this loss and we'd trust that God would be our comforter.

We invited friends and family to go up to the casket to write their "good-bye" message to Adam. As a line formed, we began to play the tape of music that was important to Adam—and to all of us. The following songs were included:

"I Love You So Much" by Barbara Milne

"Happy Birthday, Cassy," "Little Bunny Foo Foo," "Once There Was A Little Kitten," "Pledge of Allegiance," "Our Beautiful Flag," and "God Bless America," all sung by Adam age 5.

A few songs sung by Adam and the Imago School Chapel Choir from 1991.

"As The Deer" by Denise Seymour
"Beautiful Boy" by John Lennon
"Under My Bed" by Joe Scruggs (This is a song that Adam sang at The Imago School Fine Arts Revue)
"Animal Crackers" by Peter Alsop

We played the phone message that Adam had recorded for our home answering machine

"Sue Me," a song Adam sang to Meridith when they were both starring in "Guys and Dolls"

"Sounds of Silence," by Simon and Garfunkel
"Summer Love" sung by Adam and Cassy on our family cruise in 1998
"I've Got You Under My Skin," sung by Adam in 1998
"Santeria," by Sublime
"With Or Without You," by U2
"Send In The Clowns," by Frank Sinatra
"Help Me God," by Kathy Troccoli

When the music ended I gave the eulogy that I had written.

“Adam surprised us in 1979 by being born 6 ½ weeks early. It was just about the only time in his life that he was early for something. He weighed only 3 pounds, 8 ounces. We almost lost him because he stopped breathing twice. He stayed in the hospital pre-natal intensive care unit for three weeks until he reached about 5 pounds. Once we took him home though, he grew rapidly in mind, body and soul.

“We read books to him almost every night at bedtime and it became a special time together. It helped develop Adam's lifelong interest in reading. By the time he was 4 years old, he was reading to us! He really was a brilliant boy. When he went to the local kindergarten he was shocked that his classmates were still learning their colors! When he was in pre-school he began his acting career with a starring role in "Caps For Sale." He performed in plays every year since!

He attended The Imago School for grades 1-8. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Imago, it is a small private and very conservative Christian school. Every year they had a "Fine Arts Revue" with talented students playing violin and lovely piano pieces, but Adam shattered that tradition by performing funny, wacky songs.

“In his early teen years, he enjoyed writing and singing songs with his little sister and his cousins Emily, Jesse and Jacob. He also enjoyed making video action movies with his good friends Nathan Daman and James Gray.

“He attended Lexington Christian Academy for high school and he received the "Headmaster Scholarship For Academics." He was elected class president in his sophomore year. He played soccer and he was on the wrestling team. He won a Massachusetts Drama Award in his junior year. It was during his high school years that he developed his truly unique fashion sense. One day he would dress in a business suit, next day he'd be wearing 1970’s polyester pants and shirt. One day in his senior year, Cassy was going to Lexington Christian Academy for an entrance interview. Cassy was hoping to make a good impression and was dressed very conservatively. Adam arrived at school wearing 1970s brown polyester pants tucked into high-top military boots, a blue frilly tux shirt, his hair was in pig-tails, and he was wearing eye make-up. That was Adam. Always different.

“Adam seemed silly on the outside, but his heart was very concerned about his friends' needs. Here is a prayer that he wrote about a friend in school:

‘God, Thank you for revealing yourself to me in ways that I have no choice but to believe. Thank you for the miracles You have performed in my life. I pray today that you would do the same for Kelly. Show her proof that she cannot refuse. Open her heart and let her see that she has strayed and can come back to You. Give me the strength and words to show You to her. Help me to answer the questions she has. I pray for healing in Kelly's body, Lord. Take her disease and send it back to where it belongs. Rebuild her health and give her the peace of mind that comes from healing. If I cannot help, lead her to people who can. Show her that there are people who love her, that want to help. People who are willing to help. Break down all her defenses and leave her vulnerable to Your words. Let her feel the pain so she can begin her healing.’

“After high school, Adam went to The Boston Conservatory of Music to major in musical theatre. His appearance changed on a very regular basis. It was Adam and the Amazing Technicolor Hair. Blue, yellow, green and flaming red. The world was his stage and every day was another play. He loved to act, sing, dance and have fun.

“Adam decided not to return to the Conservatory for his sophomore year. He wanted to take some time to enjoy life in Newport, Rhode Island and work on his poetry. Mal and I weren't too thrilled with this choice. We had hoped that Adam would become a grown-up responsible adult. Instead, he became involved in the lives of lots of young people that many in the world would consider lost. Little did we know that Adam had unknowingly decided to go into ‘missions work’. He didn't choose some exotic land or third-world country. Adam did God's work in Rhode Island. Last night, the so-called "lost" kids of Newport, Rhode Island held a candlelight memorial in the park for Adam. The principal of the local high school spoke about the lives that were changed by Adam. He rescued kids from suicide and drug addiction. He convinced criminals to turn away from their ways. He taught many people how to have fun and enjoy life. He was a responsible, caring and loving adult after all.

“At our request, Adam spent the past year living with us in New Hampshire, but his heart longed for Newport. He recently decided to go to the University of Rhode Island for the second semester that would have started yesterday.

“About a week ago, I had the chance to sit on the couch with Adam. I told him how much I loved him and asked him not to go back to Rhode Island because I didn't think he was ready. I wanted him to be with us a little longer.

“In my life, I married young and although I still go to my Dad for advice, my father's parenting chores were done, allowing my father and I to become best friends. Adam and I were just entering the friend stage of our relationship. I had hoped for a longer time as friends.

“Two years ago, Adam didn't have any money to buy us a Christmas gift so he wrote us this letter. It has become the best gift he could have given us. He wrote:

‘As we grow old, time moves quickly. Too quickly for parents and children.

Mother, we have lost the time when I slept in your arms. There are many nights when I am alone, that I imagine myself sleeping on your lap, but still I do not call.

Father, time has moved on, past cars on the braided carpet to cars in the driveway. And my memories of games and stories, have, over time, become tainted with arguments and things muttered under our breath.

As a child, I missed so many chances to tell you I love you. Now, as an adult, I will not. I love you both.’

“I'm thankful for the time we had with Adam. We loved him and he loved us. We also know that our beautiful boy is now dancing in Heaven with his amazing flaming-red hair. I'd like to share a poem of Adam's that he gave his Mom to read late one night. This will give you a glimpse into Adam's thoughts.

"When I was small, I flew once.

Built up speed and caught the wind

And just flew.

No one believes me but I did.

There was nothing to tell me I couldn't.

Soon after, I began to discover that the more I learned, the more I grew, the less I could remember

What it felt like to glide across the yard.

Now recently, I have been remembering my flight.

I would give anything to be free again,

But of course it's impossible.

The adult brain is filled with laws; rules; formulas.

But once, when I was small, I flew.

No one believes me,

But I did.’

After this eulogy, my daughter Cassy, and her friend Nicole, sang "Wind Beneath My Wings." Cassy was confident that she could sing this by herself without crying but Nicole offered to stand with her to help, just in case Cassy couldn't get through the whole song.

Mal's sister Madeline shared the following:

"C.S. Lewis once surmised that each person is created to see a different facet of God's beauty. Something no one else can see in quite the same way, thereby blessing all worshipers of God through all eternity with an aspect of God they could not otherwise see.”

“Today, my wish would be that we all think about the facet of God that Adam so brilliantly showed us. A God that is all-loving; looking beyond what is seen by the mortal eye.

“Through Adam's creativity, many hair colors and many characters, we know that our God is watching, possibly entertained, yet meeting each person where they are. Yes, there are people who only through Adam's light, caught a glimmer of a wonderfully unique God. Our job is to never forget Adam's unique light; to carry it on even if that light is a glow-stick."

Our good friend, Barbara Foote, shared this poem that she wrote:

“A wild and crazy loveable boy,

Who brought everyone so much joy.

You saw the laughter in his eyes,

While waiting for the next surprise.

Wild T-shirts, chain belts, pierced eyebrow. But jeekers,

I remember when he came home with his new orange sneakers.

You saw vibrant colored hair with maybe a different part,

But did you see deep into Adam's heart?

Today you must laugh, joke, dance and sing,

Cuz you do not know what tomorrow will bring.

Look all around every which way,

See clearly what the Lord has for you today.

Every day, if we have not danced at least once, we should consider it lost.

Giving your heart to Jesus Christ is such a small cost.

I have been so weary that Adam's life has come to an end,

I have cried and cried to God, "What can I say to my friend?"

He gently wraps His loving arms around me and says, ‘My child, do not roam.

You must see I have taken Adam home.

When all is so weary and you feel you cannot stand,

I will hold you up with My very gentle hand.

You miss his smile, his craziness, his act for all to see,

Be calm my child for he is dancing here with Me!

‘In Me, place your heart and believe.

Be open and expect to receive!’

Paul, Mal and Cassy; this poem is what I do,

And know forever, we are here for you."

Adam's closest friend, Meridith Burkus shared her thoughts about Adam and she sang the song, "No One Is Alone" from the play, "Into The Woods," accompanied on the piano by Adam's High School drama teacher, Christopher Greco. Meridith's brothers, David and Andy, (both were good friends of Adam) joined her up front to sing "I Will Sing Of Your Love Forever."

Adam's friend Alletta began to cry as she read a poem that she wrote and Meridith stood with her for support.

Next chapter: We open up the service for anyone to share their thoughts about Adam.

Part 172

2009-12-07T08:58:00.003-08:00

Part 172

Saturday, January 13, 2001 was the day of our son’s funeral-memorial service. Lots of people were involved in putting this service together. Our church had members, Ken and Ellen Braley, Artie and Carol Boudreau, and David and Carolyn Lincoln, who volunteered to handle things like preparing the school gymnasium for however big a crowd may show up. We had no idea how many people would come to the service because we had moved away from most of our long-time friends in Massachusetts and it seemed unlikely that people would drive over one-hundred miles to attend. Our church volunteers also made sure there was enough food to feed the attendees. Ellen Braley handled the design and printing of the memorial program that I kept changing even up to the morning of the service. Family members had sorted through hundreds of photographs of Adam and planned a photograph display. Scott Bixby, another church member, offered to handle the music portion, starting and stopping the cassettes that my brother-in-law Greg and I had put together.

I wasn’t sure what I wanted to wear to Adam’s memorial service. I’m not comfortable in a suit and I rarely get “dressed up.” I decided to wear blue jeans and one of Adam’s sweaters. Mal wore a long, black skirt and a gray sweater that Adam had given her as a Christmas gift. Several friends and relatives had asked us what would be “appropriate” and we assured them that anything they’d like to wear would be okay with us. (Not that it matters, but Adam would have approved of anything from suits to t-shirts. He loved clothes.)

Even though the service wasn’t set to begin for several more hours, Mal and I decided to go there early to make sure that things were set up the way we had envisioned. There were already several people there. Dean, from the funeral home, was already there and he had about 350 chairs set up. The casket was in the front and several beautiful flower arrangements were on display, bringing much-needed color to the gym. The school principal, David Borchers, made sure we had colored markers for people to write their messages on the casket. Scott Bixby did a quick run-through of the music and made notes so he’d know when to start and stop the music during the program. Jim Morel, our pastor, was also there early to help out in any way he could. He agreed to speak a little bit at the beginning and the end of the service and he gave us the freedom to do the rest of the service as we wanted. By 9:00 am, there were about fifty people in the gymnasium. I remember pacing the floor, nervously hoping that everything would go as smoothly as possible, so that this final “tribute” to Adam would be meaningful.

We had a memorial table set up off to one side and Mal arranged some photographs of Adam and some of his personal belongings including his favorite pair of shoes, some clothes, his guitar, a favorite book, his Bible, and a quilt that Mal had made for him several years ago.

By 11:00 am there were probably 200 people there and the service wasn’t supposed to begin until 1:00pm. A friend asked me if I was having the memorial service videotaped and I replied that I’d never want to re-live this day.

By noon, our close group of friends, including Liz Verhoeks, Jim and Barb Foote, Russ and Jeanne Sample, and Eric and Linda Robinson, all managed to sit together. The gymnasium was nearly full. Mal, Cassy, and I sat in the front row on one side. Adam’s friend, Meridith sat in the front row on the other side and she reserved the seat next to her for Adam’s current girlfriend, Alletta.

By 12:45pm the gym was really packed with people and there were people still steadily arriving. People were standing 3 or 4 deep all around the gym because all of the seats and the bleachers were filled. Just before 1:00 pm, the chartered bus arrived filled with the kids from Newport, Rhode Island. They were a colorful group! Most had brightly colored or unusually cut hair and almost all of them were wearing huge, baggy pants. They were crying and carrying arms full of flowers. Most had orange-colored ribbons either tied in their hair or dangling from pierced earrings in their ears. One boy, with a mohawk haircut and lots of tattoos, came up to Mal and me and proudly showed us his newest tattoo on his forearm. It was Adam’s nickname, “Skaerie.”

Next chapter: The memorial service begins.

Part 171

2009-12-07T08:58:00.001-08:00

Part 171

We got a phone call from one of the parents of the kids from Newport, Rhode Island, asking if it would be okay for a bunch of the “Park Rats” to come up to the memorial service on Saturday. They planned to rent a bus so they could all ride up together. Of course, we told them that they’d be welcome.

Mal came up with an unusual idea to help the “Park Rats” say good-bye to Adam. Because of Adam’s love of words and poetry she thought of an interesting way for friends and family to express their final thoughts. We went to the Wilkerson-Beane Funeral Home and we bought a silver casket that had a surface that would allow people to use markers to write “messages” to Adam. Mal, being far more compassionate than I, knew this would help the kids deal with the loss of Adam. I, on the other hand, was partially blaming these “Park Rats” for Adam’s death. My resentment of these kids and my personal grief was making it nearly impossible for me to think clearly enough to write the eulogy that I wanted for the memorial service.

We still had some relatives staying with us at our home so there were a lot of conversations going on most of the day. I remember very little of the content of the conversations but I know that we welcomed the diversion. We were still trying to finish putting together the music portion of the memorial service when Mal’s sister Madeline suggested a beautiful closing song that was a favorite song of Mal’s. Mal worked with several other relatives, sorting through our family photo albums to create a display for the memorial service. Things were pretty hectic. It was during the quieter times that the magnitude of our loss was the most intense. As evening approached, without thinking, I got out a blank videotape to record one of Adam’s favorite TV shows for him (“Ed” starring Tom Cavanagh and Julie Bowen).

Friends continued to stop by bringing more food and offering their condolences. One woman, who had recently lost a child, shared a Bible verse with us. “Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in Him.”

We began receiving condolences through email and lots of cards. Two emails from women Adam had known. One said, “I really have no words to express how much Adam will be missed. He was an excellent friend and probably the most charming person I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing. I know how much he hated sadness and everyone here in Newport is trying desperately to make him proud. This morning I saw the most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen and we all know in our hearts that it was Adam’s way of saying he’s okay. I can see him now, having the time of his life up there. All of the people he loved keeping him company until we can see him again. If anything, this has renewed my faith in God. Adam was most definitely the epitome of all that is good and he loved to make people smile. He will be remembered forever by all of the people who were fortunate enough to have known him.”

Another wrote, “When I think of Adam I see his smiling face. I see him dancing around enjoying whatever music is playing at the time. Whenever I needed something done and I asked Adam to do it for me, he was always willing to help. My thoughts and memories of Adam are all good ones and happy ones. His smile is the first thing that comes to mind whenever I hear his name mentioned. He was a really good friend and I will miss him. We will all miss him. I’m glad I had the chance to know him and work with him.”

A manager at the restaurant wrote, “I personally wanted to tell you that I am deeply sorry. Adam is and will be always loved by everyone he has touched. He made the lonely feel like they belonged and he made the sad happy again. His wonderful personality, humor and regard for people’s feelings will be remembered forever. He made our days at “Friendly’s” easy to get through.”

Later, as I drove through Laconia, New Hampshire, I discovered that the large sign at “Friendly’s” that normally advertised food “specials” had been changed to read, “We love you Adam.” Our friends, Mike and Liz Verhoeks (owners of Laconia Pottery), used their store sign to say, “We love and will remember you Adam” and “Our love goes out to you, Paul, Mal, and Cassy.”

We got a phone call from Alletta (Adam’s friend from Newport) inviting us to attend a candlelight service that the Park Rats had organized. The kids wanted to do something special in memory of Adam and they didn’t want any trouble with the local police so they actually got permission from the city. The city insisted that the kids have at least a couple of responsible adults there during the service so they arranged to have the local high school principal there to keep things under control. Mal and I really wanted to be there but it would have meant that we’d have at least seven hours of round-trip driving and we knew we’d need to be as rested as possible for the memorial service the next morning. My brother David and his wife Stacy lived a short distance from the Newport park where the candlelight service was going to be held and he offered to go to represent our family. He also offered to videotape it for us.

David called me as soon as he got home after the candlelight service ended to share with us what had happened. He emotionally explained to me how much Adam was loved by these kids in Newport and how much of an impact he had on them. When our conversation was over, I felt differently about these kids. I no longer angry at them and I no longer resented them. They were mourning the loss of Adam too. I went to my computer and began working on the eulogy. There were only twelve hours before the memorial service the next morning.

There was an article in the Newport Daily News the next morning about the kid’s candlelight service. It said:

“Victim made big impression.”

“About 100 people held a vigil at Queen Anne Square to celebrate the life of Adam ‘Skaerie’ Howley, who spent the last two summers in Newport and died in an accident Tuesday in New Hampshire.

“Adam Howley lived in Newport for only a short time, but he left behind an army of friends. Howley, 21, died Tuesday in an auto accident in Laconia, New Hampshire. On Friday night, 100 or so of his local friends gathered in Queen Anne Square to remember Howley in a festival of warm feelings on a cold night. The crowd was made up mostly of teenagers from Aquidneck Island’s three public high schools.

“Some wore white T-shirts printed with Howley’s picture. Others were decked out in orange, his favorite color. The mourners gave speeches, sang songs, held candles, laughed loudly, hugged one another and shed tears.

“Howley lived in New Hampshire in recent years, but planned to attend the University of Rhode Island for the upcoming semester, He lived in Newport during the past two summers and made an impact on the kids who frequent Queen Anne Square—the skateboarders, punk rockers and hackey-sackers, the kids who often live on the fringe of the high school social whirl.

“During Friday night’s memorial service in the park, crowd member after crowd member shared an anecdote or positive wish. One boy told how the upbeat Howley helped him through a tough stretch after his mother died. A girl said she knew Howley only slightly, but that he befriended her when she ran away from home.

“Some talked about how he taught them to appreciate and respect each other’s differences. ‘He was the kind of guy who was there if you needed anything,’ said Chris Kennedy, a Rogers High School sophomore. ‘He was just a great man. Everyone really respected him.’

“Evan Sims of Newport started to sing, ‘It’s So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday’ by Boyz 2 Men, but got choked up during the first try. He gave it another shot and faltered again. At that point, several other youngsters joined him on the lawn, wrapped their arms around one another and helped Sims finish the song.

“Victor Thomas of Newport and Tim Dyer of Middletown wore ‘Skaerie T-shirts’ and talked about their friend. Thomas said Howley lived with him for awhile. ‘He was a great guy, a talented guy,’ Thomas said. ‘He changed the lives of all the people here.’

“Dyer said Howley was an upbeat person, who befriended people and encouraged them. ‘He taught a lot of kids what life is all about,’ Dyer said.

“Rogers High School Principal Victoria Johnson attended the vigil. Howley never attended Rogers but he was friend to many students.

“‘We honor the people we love,’ Johnson said. ‘That’s what life is all about.’

“Barbara Pothier is godmother to Howley’s girlfriend, Alletta Cooper. Pothier said Howley was a talented poet, and told the group she wondered if he would have become a politician or an actor. ‘A great person,’ shouted a boy in the crowd, to great applause.

“As the tribute wore down, many sang, ‘I’ll Be Missing You,’ the tribute that Puff Daddy and Faith Evans recorded in honor of rapper Biggie Smalls. The mourners raised candles to the night sky and one boy yelled, ‘Hail to the king! Long live Skaerie!’”

Next chapter: The Memorial Service.

Pictures: Signs around Laconia

The candlelight memorial service in the park in Newport, RI

Part 170

2009-12-07T08:55:00.001-08:00

Part 170

My old friend, Allan Traylor, came up to our home in New Hampshire to share our grief. He brought Paul and Barbara Weatherbee with him. Paul and Barbara were very important to us because they helped lay the groundwork for our strong Christian faith. I remember the three of them standing in our kitchen patiently listening to us talk about Adam. I think I read them some of the poetry Adam had written. They shared some memories of Adam with us too. It was very meaningful to Mal and I that Allan, Paul and Barbara came to be with us. But I mostly remember how difficult it was for me to talk about Adam without crying. If I couldn’t hold myself together in my own house with close friends who loved us, how on earth could I stand up in front of dozens of people at the upcoming memorial service?

My youngest brother, Rick, came up and he went to the accident site with my brother-in-law Greg to gather up the items that were scattered on the ground during the process of the rescue squad getting Adam out of the wrecked car. They also went to the junkyard where the car was taken (Greg knew I wouldn’t want to see the crushed car) and recovered all of Adam’s stuff. There were piles of clothes, lots of trash, hundreds of music CDs, and the briefcase I had given him when he was a young kid containing some beads and his autographed picture of Davy Jones of The Monkees. Most of it was still soaked with diesel fuel so not too much was salvageable. Greg brought it to his home and spread it out on tarps in his garage so we could go through it. We kept Adam’s CDs, a few items of clothing and his briefcase.

Greg and I spent many hours putting together music for the upcoming memorial service. We listened to old audio tapes of Adam singing at his elementary school and watched hours of home movies on video tape, trying to determine what would be the most meaningful songs and snippets of dialog to celebrate Adam’s life. The people who would come to the memorial service knew Adam at various points in his life so we thought we should share a broad range of songs that reflected his whole life. Seeing Adam on videotape made this an emotional time for us all, but we knew we had to finish this soon.

When the local newspaper was delivered, the front page featured the following story:

“Gilford man, 21, dies in crash”

“A Gilford man was killed on Tuesday when his car collided head-on with a dump truck on Route 106. Police say that the man was in the process of making a U-turn when the accident occurred.

“According to a press release issued by the Belmont Police Department, Adam Howley, 21, no address given, was transported to Lakes Region General Hospital by the Belmont Fire Department ambulance where he was pronounced dead from injuries suffered in the collision.

“The accident occurred at 11:19 a.m. while Howley was traveling north in his Honda Accord near the intersection of Lamprey and Farrarville Roads.

“Police say that Howley’s vehicle crossed the center lane of Route 106 just south of the intersection and struck the side of an unloaded dump truck driven by Christopher Fortin, 44, of Belmont. Fortin was traveling south when the accident occurred. He was uninjured in the crash, police said.

“Once on the scene, police found that Howley’s vehicle had spun to the side of the road in the northbound lane, while the dump truck had spun in the opposite direction, landing in an area just off the southbound portion of the roadway.

“Traffic on a portion of Route 106 was detoured while police and firefighters picked through large amounts of debris that were scattered all over the road.

“According to the police report, Howley’s vehicle was totally destroyed and the dump truck received substantial damage to the driver’s side.

“‘It appears that the car that was headed northbound was making a U-turn to change directions when it went in the path of the dump truck traveling in the opposite direction,’ Belmont Police Chief David Nielsen said at the accident scene. ‘The vehicles collided in the southbound lane causing the car to spin into the northbound shoulder of the road, and the truck to spin into an area off of the southbound lane,’ Nielsen said.

“According to the Belmont Police, Howley is from Gilford and was attending an out-of-state university. No further information on him was immediately available. Belmont Fire Department, the Gilmanton Police Department, the Belknap County Sheriff’s Department and the New Hampshire State Police all assisted Belmont Police Department at the scene.”

When I first read this, I was stunned by the headline referring to Adam as a “man.” I had not thought of him that way. To me he was my child, my kid. Then, after thinking about the story, I became more upset. I had talked with the Police Chief Nielsen and based on the truck driver’s statement, he knew that Adam was not trying to make an illegal U-turn. Adam had fallen asleep and his car slowly drifted across the lane. I called the newspaper reporter and asked him to correct this story. During our short conversation the reporter lamented that the police wouldn’t let him close enough to the accident scene to get a “good” photograph of the wrecked car. I ended my phone call before I lost my temper with him. This is what he wrote:

“Accident victim may have dozed off.”

“While police initially thought a U-turn was to blame for the motor vehicle accident which claimed the life of 21-year-old Adam Howley of Gilford, officials and the driver of the dump truck which was hit now believe that it is more likely that the victim fell asleep at the wheel or was distracted.

“There is no question from police or the driver of the other vehicle involved in the accident that Howley’s Honda Accord crossed the center line before it struck the side of Christopher Fortin’s unloaded dump truck.

“The questions which remain are why Howley crossed into the southbound lane of Route 106 and why he failed to see the large truck traveling in the opposite direction.

“Fortin, who watched the accident unfold in front of his eyes, maintains that Howley wasn’t in the process of doing a U-turn when he swerved and struck the truck. He talked about what he saw through the windshield of his dump truck moments before it was hit. ‘I can’t say exactly what happened, but it seemed to me like he must have been asleep. I saw him come into my lane and I pulled into the breakdown lane. When something like that happens, the first thing you do is to give the person the entire road to get corrected and I moved over as much as possible,’ said Fortin.

“He added that Howley’s vehicle continued in its path with the driver unresponsive to the dangers which lay ahead.

‘“He was in my lane for a long period of time. I have been driving for a long time and I have never seen anything like it. I don’t think he knew my truck was even there. Looking at this right in front of me was very unusual and scary,’ remarked Fortin.

“While Fortin’s testimony points toward Howley having fallen asleep at the wheel, local authorities say they can’t be sure why the car traveled into the southbound lane. Detective Steve Crockett of the Belmont Police Department was on the scene following the accident.

‘We aren’t sure what caused him to cross the center line. We investigated the matter and concluded that there were no mechanical problems in either of the vehicles that would have caused them to enter into each other’s lanes. He could have dozed off or he could have been distracted. We just don’t know for sure,’ said Crockett.”

After this poorly written article, the same reporter sloppily (and with some misquotes and factual errors) wrote another article about Adam:

“Young man killed in crash remembered as ‘gifted’, artistic.”

“The parents of a 21-year-old local man, who was killed in a motor vehicle accident in Belmont on Tuesday, say their son was an aspiring actor who was preparing to leave for college in the spring.

“‘Adam was enrolled to start college in the spring semester at University of Rhode Island. He was going to leave on Friday for school,’ said Paul Howley, Adam’s father.

“Adam Howley, 12 Williamsburg Ave., Gilford, died at Lakes Region General Hospital from injuries received when his car crossed the center line on Route 106 and collided with a dump truck.

“On Wednesday, his father talked about the loss of his son saying that when the accident occurred, Adam was returning from an appointment at the University of Rhode Island.

“‘When you hear about something like that you are just in shock. He had called me in the morning from the school at 8 a.m. and he said he would see me in a little while,’ lamented the father.

“While a definite answer as to what caused the accident that claimed Adam’s life has not been made, his parents say they have only begun to deal with the sudden loss of their son.

“‘We are making arrangements today to take care of everything, but it is really tough to be taking out old pictures and looking back at his life,’ said Paul.

“Paul and his wife Marilyn are originally from Massachusetts, where Adam graduated from Lexington Christian Academy.

“‘When he got out of high school, Adam went to school for one year at The Boston Conservatory of Music majoring in theater,’ Paul explained. ‘He has always been in plays ever since he was five years old and he knew what he wanted to be. He loved to sing and dance, and it comforts us to know that now he is dancing in Heaven.’

He also said Adam was an extremely gifted individual.

“‘He was a really brilliant kid. He won the Headmaster’s Scholarship for Academics when he was in high school and also won a Massachusetts Drama award. He was a fun-loving and truly caring person. Adam was always happy and we will really miss him,’ Paul said.

“He said Adam had been working at Friendly’s Restaurant on Union Avenue in Laconia since July. Personnel who worked with him at the establishment said that Adam will be missed very much.

“‘Sunday was his last day because he was returning to college. He was a prep cook here and a waiter. Around here, he was one of the gang and everyone loved him,’ said Mike Kearney, general manager at Friendly’s.

“‘He had a really great personality and was truly funny. Last Sunday he dyed his hair red because of a play he was doing. He was a very young man and this is very sad,’ Kearney said, adding that approximately 300-400 people are expected at Adam’s memorial service.”

Next chapter: preparations for the memorial service.

Picture: The accident scene

Part 160 - 169

2009-12-07T08:53:00.001-08:00

Part One Hundred & Sixty

I was sitting in the Belknap Mall in New Hampshire in the booth space I had rented in the center of the mall which was set up as a display of rare and valuable collectible toys, trading cards, comic books and model kits. My advertisements had been running for a few days in a few local newspapers and I was anticipating people coming in to sell me some interesting items. A few hours passed and no one came in with anything for me to make an offer on or to appraise. Mal, my wife, came by around noon to bring me a lunch and to see how things were going. I was disappointed that I hadn’t bought anything yet. Perhaps the local newspaper ads were just too small to be noticed.

When I closed up the booth at 9 pm, I hadn’t bought anything. The day had been wasted. Frustrated, I called the two major local newspapers the next morning to try to encourage them to write an actual article about my appearance at the mall and was told by both of them that they’d try to send a reporter out to interview me at the mall location. I suggested that they may want to send a photographer too because the selection of rare collectibles would make an interesting photograph for the upcoming article.

I returned to the mall and set up the booth display again. (I couldn’t leave such a valuable collection overnight in the open space of the mall) During the morning I bought some not very valuable record albums and some vintage Hot Wheels cars still sealed in the original packages. I paid $75.00 for the six Hot Wheels cars assuming I could sell them for about $125.00 for the lot. Since I didn’t have any samples of these cars in my booth display, I added them into a prominent location. Later in the day, these Hot Wheels cars caught the eye of two guys, Jim Blackie and Dan Schroeder. Both of them hung around and chatted with me about collectibles for a couple of hours. I would have been very bored if they hadn’t come by. (Both of these guys are still friends of mine many years later!) By the end of the day I had given appraisals and purchased everything that had been brought in to me including a few comic books from the 1970s, the Hot Wheels cars, some Matchbox vehicles, some record albums, and a very nice lot of original 1960s G. I. Joe dolls in their original boxes. I was disappointed that the local newspaper’s reporters never came by to interview me but at least my advertisements were noticed by some people. Some of the money I had invested in this mall rental would be recouped once I sold the collectibles I had just bought.

The next day I was surprised when my son, Adam, and his then-girlfriend, Alletta (who was staying at our house for a couple of days), stopped by for visit. Adam was dressed up as a punk rocker. I was so happy that he was expressing an interest in what I was doing and took the time to come to see me that his outlandish “costume” didn’t bother me. Adam was constantly changing his appearance by dyeing his hair bright colors and he’d go from wacky clothes to conservative clothes depending on his mood. They stayed and visited for quite a while and it was very enjoyable.
The next morning, before I went to the mall, I called the editors of the local newspapers to remind them that I was still hoping they’d do a short story about me and they assured me they’d send a reporter that day.

Shortly after I got to the mall, a man and his wife came by to tell me about some vintage items they’d be interested in selling to me. They hadn’t seen my advertisements but had been referred by Karen Fogg, a fellow school board member and a friend of mine. This couple had a few things that interested me but I was not sure of their accurate current value was so I suggested that they allow me to try to sell a few of the items for a small commission. They agreed to this and I told them I’d contact them sometime in the coming weeks to make arrangements.

Later that day, both newspapers sent their reporters out to interview me. The reporters also took several photographs of me with my collectible display. Neither of them could guarantee when these stories would appear in their newspapers but I urged them to hurry before my week was done! It wouldn’t help me if the stories ran when my mall rental was over! Two days later, the stories still had not appeared in the newspapers.
Next chapter: With only two days left of my time in the mall, the two newspaper stories appear.

Picture: Adam and Alletta

Part One Hundred & Sixty One

After several phone calls to the local newspapers in Laconia, New Hampshire, they finally sent reporters out to interview me about my interest in buying collectibles while I had my display of rare toys set up in the Belknap Mall. Both reporters asked the “right” questions and it encouraged me that it could be quite good for me if they really published articles about me in their newspapers. I had some success buying items already because of the many advertisements I had purchased but no advertisement is as effective as an article with photographs. Days passed and no articles appeared. Now my rental time in the mall was almost done.

Then, with only one day left, I checked both local newspapers when I arrived home from the mall that night. To my surprise, there were huge articles, with photographs, in both of the newspapers! The Laconia Citizen wrote:

“The Art of Buying and Selling Collectibles”
“Stanley and Dodie Pike of Belmont walked away with $141 in their pocket from Paul Howley’s kiosk-like display at The Belknap Mall for the sale of old photographs and magazines they found 15 years ago in someone’s trash.

“Howley, 45, of Gilford, has been a collector, mostly of comic books and toys, since he was a teen-ager. During the years, he has turned his fascination into a profitable career, and now, with his wife Mal, co-owns two collectibles stores named That’s Entertainment in Massachusetts, the largest in the country.

“‘I started off in the low end of the high-tech field, and when I decided to make this career change 21 years ago, my boss at the time thought I was nuts. Now, he’s probably working the same job, and I’m volunteering my time in my daughter’s school, serving on the school board, and doing what I love,’ he said.

“‘I explain to my kids (Adam, 21, and Cassy 16) I never have a bad day because I love what I do,’ Howley said laughing, ‘and I get paid for it.’

“Howley retired from the day-to-day operation of That’s Entertainment six years ago, having moved to Gilford two years ago. He explained that he has 12 full-time trustworthy employees who proficiently run the stores, allowing him time to dabble in the retail market as he chooses. Howley has been offering free appraisals at The Belknap Mall kiosk since Monday and will continue the service until Sunday. It is the first time he has offered this type of service locally, and he explained the items he has on display were shipped from his stores in Massachusetts where they will be returned upon the kiosk’s close.

“Those who bring items such as old books and magazines, model kits, G.I.Joe and Barbie dolls, old CDs and videos may have free appraisals on their treasures and opt to sell them to Howley.

“‘I have $250,000 to spend on these types of items this week, and I’d like to spend it all,’ Howley said. His business has been successful, Howley said, because of his honesty with people and making savvy financial decisions. ‘I choose to make a little money on items people buy rather than gouge them,’ Howley explained. ‘I would rather have them come back to see me several times instead of just once.’

“To prove this point, Howley told of one person who has been a customer for all of the 21 years he has been in business. ‘And now I’m starting to sell items to their kids, it’s kind of a scary thought,’ he laughed.

“As far as the financial decisions, Howley spoke of the purchase of the 20,000 square-foot building in Worcester that houses one of his stores. ‘It was during the 1980s, the building was on the market for $750,000. You can’t pay three quarters of a million dollars and sell funny books; it just doesn’t work that way. But my timing was perfect—about a month later, the real estate crash came into play, and I made the purchase for $200,000.’

“Howley believes his business has also thrived because he provides a service to people. ‘When I tell them their G.I.Joe doll, for instance, this one I bought while I’ve been here,’ he said, picking up the boxed doll, ‘is worth $225, I’m being honest. I offered them $150 because I know it’s an item I can sell tomorrow,’ he said. ‘To get the $225, they could post it on Ebay and sell it for that amount. The difference is, all that takes time. With me, they walk away with $150 ten minutes later and they don’t have to bother. It’s a done deal.’

“Howley said he really cannot say why people become collectors. “You’re either a collector or you’re not.’ But with him it started in 1959 with comic books and accelerated with toy items from the popular TV series, The Man From U.N.C.L.E. ‘I co-wrote a book called, The Toys From UNCLE. It was self-published and originally sold for $9.95,’ he said. Recently Howley has seen that same book posted for sale on the Internet for $35. ‘It’s become somewhat of a collectible itself,’ he said.

“Howley is especially proud of winning the prestigious ‘Will Eisner Spirit of Comics Award’ in 1997 which named That’s Entertainment the best comic book and collectible store in the world.

“‘It’s like winning an Academy Award, it carries that much significance in this business,’ he explained.

“Aside from the passion he has for the collectibles, Howley also enjoys the people-element of his operation. ‘I have a common interest with most everyone I deal with,’ he said. During the days he’s been at the Belknap Mall, Howley said he has had one gentleman visit the kiosk three times, not to do business, but to talk. ‘It’s been wonderful—I now have a new friend.’

“Howley’s plans for the future are to simply continue doing what he’s doing.

“‘It’s my passion, I love it. It just couldn’t be any better than it is. It’s been fun to spend the week here at the Belknap Mall. I’m sure when the week is over, I’ll have a lot of dusty old stuff. It’s great!’”

Next chapter: The other newspaper’s article.

Part One Hundred & Sixty Two

The night before my last buying day in the Belknap Mall, the two major local newspapers ran articles with photographs. This is the article from The Laconia Daily Sun:

“Old Toys May Bring New Treasures.” By Lin Hourihan

“Who would have ever thought that taking such good care of his toys and comic books for over 40 years could have afforded him to spend $250,000 this week on those treasured collectibles?

“That’s just what Paul Howley, local collector and dealer, is doing at The Belknap Mall this week. He’s on a mission to hunt down comic books, old toys and games, old books and magazines, model kits, G. I. Joe dolls, Barbie dolls, and many other interesting items. He’ll tell you what your collection is worth and possibly might buy it from you.

“This is one hot collectibles dealer, owner of That’s Entertainment, New England’s largest collectible store located in Worcester, Massachusetts. However, Howley, who now resides in Gilford, has brought his business to the Internet through the wonderful world of Ebay and now sells internationally.
“Among his prestigious lists of accomplishments in his toy story is his winning the 1997 “Will Eisner Spirit Of Comics Award,” a beautiful cut-glass award and an international recognition for comic retailing. In 1996 Howley came in second to a company in Australia.

“‘It was great for us, and we had to prepare all of the documentation for it all,’ said Howley. ‘We’ve also been written up in INC.Magazine, a national business magazine, and I co-wrote the book, “The Toys From Uncle,” which is a take off from The Man From Uncle. That was my favorite TV show. I wrote the book in 1990 and was selling it for $9.95. But now it sells anywhere from $35 to $55 on Ebay,’ said Howley.

“Toy trends vary with the times, depending on the generation reminiscing of their yesteryears. The generation now recapturing those long-lost memories seem to be those people from the 1960’s and 1970’s.

“‘People generally buy in their childhood span. But things can change quickly. Two years ago Star Wars was the hottest thing in the business, now it’s slow,’ said Howley.
“‘Collecting toys is not as volatile as the stock market, but you do have to be careful on investments. We have a gigantic customer base that is based on the market right now, not on the future or the past,’ explained Howley.

“‘We’ve never had any cash problems. Now we’re a very successful company. Our website is www.thatse.com but we do most of our Internet sales with Ebay. That started five or six years ago. Three years ago that was the single most visited Internet site in the world. Now 16 million people use it everyday,’ said Howley

“This week Howley can be found in the center of the Belknap Mall, somewhere between his huge display of toys and collectibles others are bringing in for him to appraise. ‘I’m looking to spend $250,000 this week,’ he said.

“‘I don’t suggest investing in new toys. You can’t get anything more dead than Beanie Babies,’ added Howley.
“In addition to giving free appraisals and giving away free comic books this week, Howley said he is also looking for sports cards dated prior to 1975 and video tapes and music CDs.

“‘As a kid, I was very meticulous, and my room was very organized. My comic books were in order, in alphabetical order on the shelf. I still have many of the original toys I had as a kid. I played with the other kids in the neighborhood with my toys but no one ever touched my comic books,’ chuckled Howley.

“Included in his interesting collection of toys on display is the second Barbie doll ever made, now a $1000 value. If the doll was loose, it’d be worth $300, but the original box is key.

“‘I have the Man From Uncle attaché case. It was then sold to cash in on the James Bond era. It sold with this cardboard sleeve that most people threw away. In 1965 it was worth $9, now it is a $2000 item,’ said Howley.

“There are paint by number sets, dated from 1967 now selling for $250 and a model kit of The Munsters that sold for $1.98 in 1965 that is going for $2500 now. Remember the Batman card game from 1966 or the Kiss Colorforms from 1979? Well, they are going for $75 and $50 respectively.

“‘I was the first kid in my school to have a G. I. Joe. A G. I. Joe then in 1965 was $3. Now it is worth $75 and because I have it in the original box it is worth $150,’ Howley said.

“Howley’s store is in its 21st year of operation, now employing 12 full-time people who get a very good benefit package and profit sharing.

“‘Our employees are there because it is a career for them. Most of our employees have been there for ten years or more,’ said Howley

“‘I retired from the active day-to-day operation almost six years ago. I knew when I was twelve years old that I did not want to work past 40 years old. I have achieved everything I have ever wanted,’ said Howley.”

Next chapter: The results of these two newspaper articles.

Part One Hundred & Sixty Three

The two major local newspapers finally ran articles and photographs about my eagerness to buy collectibles while I was set up for a week in the Belknap Mall in New Hampshire. With only one full day left of my rental time, I was curious to see what kind of results these two articles would have as far as motivating area residents to bring their items to sell to me. The previous six days had been profitable because of a few nice lots of items I was able to buy but most of each twelve-hour day I spent alone in my booth and it was boring.

I decided to get to the mall even earlier than I had been getting there because it took me about an hour to set up the toy display each morning. I assumed that we’d have a few more people than usual showing up with stuff for me to look at and I was happy that my wife, Mal, insisted on coming with me that morning. By the time we arrived at the mall there were already about twenty people carrying boxes and pushing shopping carts full of collectibles waiting for me!
Mal and I quickly arranged our display of collectibles in our booth and I began to look through the items that the people had brought into the mall. The first few had toy trucks and Matchbox cars. The next had some old magazines. I made offers on all of these items and the people were satisfied enough and they sold them to me. The next man had a very large plastic storage container filled with comic books from the 1960’s. I asked him if he had an idea of how much he wanted for the whole lot and he said he’d like at least $50 for the lot. I started to search through the container and found several interesting comic books that I knew I could sell for $5 to $10 each. Then I found a copy of “Amazing Fantasy” issue # 15 featuring the very first appearance of Spider-Man. It was only in “good” condition because of some creases on the front cover, but I knew I could sell this for about $750. When I offered the man $600 for just this one comic book he was shocked but he was very happy. It took me about twenty minutes to calculate my offer on the whole lot of four hundred comic books but when I offered the man $1200 for the collection he was thrilled!

As I was appraising and buying stuff from the people in line, I could see that the line continued getting longer as more people carried boxes and bags of old things into the mall. I wanted to hurry through some of the appraisals but I didn’t want to be rude to anyone, so I did my best to explain the true value of each and every item. One man, who was about 15 places back in the line, yelled up to me. As I looked at him he slid a group of 1940’s comic books out of a large envelope. I told him I’d get to him as soon as I possibly could but he said he couldn’t wait any longer. He’d already waited for almost an hour. I explained that I wouldn’t be set up in the mall after today and I gave him my business card and asked him to call me the next day. He assured me that he’d call. He never did. It still annoys me that there is a large collection of rare golden-age comic books sitting somewhere in the area. I should have gotten his phone number!
The crowd was finally gone by about 4 pm and I had large piles of merchandise piled up inside my booth. I also had a few good “leads” on potential additional collections that people didn’t want to bring into the mall. One of these consisted of almost 25,000 comic books from the late 1970’s-2000. I finally completed a deal on these a few months after my mall experience. These were not particularly valuable but I did eventually sell them all.
Overall, this buying experience was exhausting but it was a profitable venture and I have a few new friends because of it.

Next chapter: We travel to New York City to feed the homeless.

Part One Hundred & Sixty Four

In November of 2000, our daughter Cassy signed up through our church to go on a trip to New York City to help distribute food and clothing to the homeless. Mal and I decided to sign up too. Adam couldn’t go because he couldn’t afford to take time off from his job.

The church Evangelism leaders, Ron and Christine St. Cyr, had made many trips to New York City over the years to help the homeless through an organization in the heart of Manhattan. They also organized overseas trips to help build churches, hospitals and orphanages.

Ron and Chris really knew how to organize these trips down to the smallest detail. They required anyone interested in going to attend several instructional classes where we were briefed on the potential dangers of this kind of outreach program. New York City was not like Laconia, New Hampshire. We practiced several potential scenarios so we could reduce possible troubles. Ron firmly explained that if at any time, he sensed a dangerous situation; we were to immediately follow his orders without hesitation.

In early December, we packed several vehicles with the winter coats, shirts, socks, gloves and mittens that we collected to give to some of the people who were homeless in New York City. We drove to a building that had large rooms upstairs for us to sleep in and a soup-kitchen-function room on one of the lower floors. The men in our group occupied one floor and the women were on another. My bunk was near one of the men from my church in New Hampshire who snored so loudly that I was actually awake almost the entire first night.

Over the next couple of days many of us prepared hundreds of sandwiches and packed up bags of toothpaste, toothbrushes, and other personal hygiene products to give to as many of the homeless people as we could find. As we met the people, we explained that there were people who cared about them and we encouraged them to seek out the help of some of the local food pantries and shelters in the area. Most of the people we found were really “in need” but we were surprised when we discovered one man living in a large box with a working television and a microwave oven. He had found a way to hook up to someone’s electrical service! Still an unpleasant way to live, but he had a good sense of humor about his awful situation. Facing a very cold winter outside, he gratefully accepted our offer of food and warm clothing.

Mal and I went with a group of other volunteers to serve hot meals at another local food pantry where it was suggested that we should try to make direct physical contact with the people by hugging them or holding their hand. Many of them would go without any physical contact for weeks or months. They needed food, but they also needed to know that others cared about them. We were saddened to see the dozens of hungry people in line waiting for a simple meal. The people we served seemed so thankful for what we were doing but we were really getting even more out of this experience.

Our daughter, Cassy, went with another group to help coordinate a “Sunday School” for several thousand inner-city children. The church would send busses around the city and parents would just put their kids on the bus so they could be brought to this church. Kids as young as three-years old were sent, alone, to the church program.

On Sunday, we all went to an enormous church service held at The Times Square Church, pastored by David Wilkerson. Then, after Ron St. Cyr reluctantly led us on a fast-moving thirty-minute sightseeing tour of the Rockefeller Center area, we headed back home to New Hampshire. Our son, Adam called our cell phone to see if we were on our way home and Mal told him we’d be back home within a few hours. But we hit an area of tremendous rain that made our driving very treacherous so we ended up several hours behind schedule. Adam called us again, worried that we may have slid off the road. He knew that Ron and Chris usually had everything on a tight schedule so it was very unusual for a trip to be this late. When we finally made it home, we were exhausted but still excited about what we had done and learned on this trip. We looked forward to going again next year as a family with Adam.

Next chapter: Christmas
Part One Hundred & Sixty Five

In October of 2000, while working on compiling all of his poetry that he’d written, Adam’s old computer “crashed.” He lost everything he had done but, since he had all of his poetry written in several small notebooks, he could start over if he had a new computer. So, for his birthday, we bought him a new state-of-the-art, very expensive computer. We didn’t ordinarily spend large amounts on birthday gifts for our kids but we knew this computer would be something Adam would use for many years. After it arrived, Adam worked on retyping all of his poetry when he had extra time. He asked me several times if I wanted to see it, but I put him off, agreeing to read it once he had it all done. In truth, I do not like most poetry so I wasn’t that interested.

As Christmas of 2000 approached, since we had just recently got him the computer, we had no idea what to buy Adam as a gift. We briefly considered buying Adam a new inexpensive car so that he’d have something very reliable for his frequent trips to visit his friends in Rhode Island. After checking out the Kia line of cars we thought the small Kia SUV might be a good idea. But after thinking about it for a while, we realized that Adam wouldn’t really take good care of a new car. Adam had bought my Honda Accord from me and within six months the car was no longer in excellent condition. He just wasn’t good at taking care of things. We’d have to come up with a better idea for a Christmas gift.

Both of our kids usually gave us a Christmas “Wish List” with some serious items, some goofy items, and a few jokes. Adam usually requested “Monkey-bacon.” One of the “joke” requests that Adam put on his list was “pay off my student loans.” Sorry kid, I don’t think so.

Mal loved Christmas. She enjoyed shopping for gifts for people, she loved Christmas music, but most of all, she loved decorating our home for Christmas. This particular Christmas season was busier than normal because we had scheduled a Laconia Christian School staff Christmas party at our home and Mal had a Christmas party for her women’s Bible study group there too. Mal set up and decorated four different Christmas trees that year but the fifth tree, in the family room, would be the one that we’d decorate with the kids. Mal had already put the lights on the tree and put the star on the top but, with the hectic schedules of our kids, there just wasn’t time to all be together to put on the rest of the decorations until a few days before Christmas.

Shortly before Christmas, Adam told us that he had decided that he wanted to go back to college. He knew he didn’t want to go back to The Boston Conservatory so he was looking into transferring to the University of Rhode Island to pursue a degree in Theatre. We wanted him to go back to college so we encouraged him to get as much information as he could before he made a decision about where he should go.

One day, after I came home to find Adam’s dirty dishes in the kitchen sink, I asked Adam to sit down and talk with me. I started by telling him that I loved him and that I was probably the only parent around who didn’t want his son to leave for college. I didn’t think he was mature enough or responsible enough to spend more time around his young friends in Newport, Rhode Island. I believed that they were a very bad influence on him and I questioned his motive for choosing a college in Rhode Island. Adam told me that the University of Rhode Island had a very good Theatre Department. He also explained that he felt it was important to be near his friends. He insisted that he knew what he was doing.

He had a lot of details to work out if he was going to be able to enroll for the January semester. He’d need to work out another student loan, get his transcripts from The Boston Conservatory, enroll in the required courses, and most importantly, he needed to secure housing. This would be the most difficult because transfer students get “last priority” for on-campus housing. Mal and I certainly didn’t want Adam to end up staying with his friends, “the Park Rats,” anymore. If he was to go back to finish his college education, we didn’t think it would be a good idea for him to be too distracted by his friends.

As Christmas approached, Adam began to work on the details for the college transfer and gave his notice at “Friendly’s,” the restaurant where he had been working. He planned to work there as close to the beginning of the January semester as possible because he really needed the extra money. Mal and I saw that Adam was concerned about having enough money to pay for his current student loans while he attended the University of Rhode Island. So, for his “big” Christmas gift, we decided to pay off his largest student loan. He was certainly shocked and happy when he opened that gift on Christmas morning! Later, when he found out that we had briefly considered buying him a new car (but decided not to because we knew he wouldn’t take good care of it) he said, “Yeah, but I bet you’ll buy Cassy a new car.” No Adam, I had no intention of buying your sixteen-year-old sister a new car.

Shortly after the start of the New Year, Adam still had no commitment of a room at the University of Rhode Island. On Thursday, he decided he’d call to insist that the college make room for him in a dormitory. He called them in the early afternoon and he was told by the voice mail message, “Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line and your call will be answered in the order it was received.” Adam sat on the couch with the phone held to his ear, waiting for his call to be answered by a human being. After several hours of being on hold, a new message came on saying, “The office is now closed. Please call back during regular business hours.” Adam wasn’t pleased. Since there was just about one week left before the January semester was to begin, Adam decided that he would drive to Rhode Island and take care of things personally. He told us that he would go to the college on Monday morning and stand in the office until they promised him a room.

Believing that most college administration-types would give more consideration to a nice, clean-cut looking guy, at our urging, Adam reluctantly agreed to return his hair to his normal brown color from the bright red color it was at the time.

On Friday, Adam packed up some clothes for his weekend trip to Newport, Rhode Island, but he first had to work a full day at Friendly’s. He planned to leave for Newport right after he got out of work that day. Mal and I came up with a short list of things that Adam needed to do while he was in Rhode Island over that weekend. He needed to find a local doctor to give him the school required physical, get information about available student loans, he needed to dye his hair, and he needed to get a promise of on-campus housing. I wrote these things on a piece of paper and brought it to him at his workplace. He promised to take care of these things as he folded the paper and put it in his pocket. He needed to be back in Laconia, New Hampshire by noon on Tuesday because he had an appointment to get his annual, State of New Hampshire required, car inspection and he assured me he’d be on-time.

Next chapter: Adam calls me on Tuesday morning.

Part One Hundred & Sixty Six

Winter in the “Lakes Region” of New Hampshire is always harsh. For five months there is lots of snow and cold. The winter of 2000-2001 was even worse than normal. The snow started in November and piled up so fast that we had to hire a company to come and truck it away because there was no more room along our driveway. But, on Tuesday, January 9th, 2001, it was a clear and snow-free day. Adam called me at 7:45 am to tell me, “I’m up and ready to get in my car so I’ll be home in time for my car inspection.” I didn’t ask him how his trip to Newport, Rhode Island went. He had a list of important things he needed to get done so he’d be able to start taking classes at the University of Rhode Island in mid-January but I didn’t ask him about these. I’d ask him when he got home.

Mal spent most of the morning preparing for a party she was hosting that night. It was her turn to have the group of women over for the monthly “Pokeno” game so she was baking up a bunch of pastries and cakes.

As it neared 11:45 a.m.we were surprised that Adam hadn’t gotten home yet. If he left when he had said he was going to leave he should have already gotten home in time for his scheduled car inspection. I called Belknap Tire and asked if I could take Adam’s allotted inspection time since it appeared as if he was going to be late. I drove to Belknap Tire and visited with my friend, Jim Foote, while my car was being inspected.

While Jim and I were talking, he got a phone call from our friend Liz who asked to speak to me. Liz told me that Mal was on her way there and I needed to be ready to go with her right away. Mal arrived a few minutes later and as I got into the car she told me that shortly after I had left the house, a state police officer had knocked on our door to tell us that Adam had been involved in a serious car accident. The policeman offered to drive Mal directly to the local hospital where Adam was being brought by ambulance but Mal knew it would be better for her to drive our car so she could pick me up to go with her to the hospital. That way, we’d have our car there so we wouldn’t have to call someone to come pick us up later on.

The policeman was unable to give Mal any details about the accident so we had no idea of the nature of Adam’s injuries. Even though we were only a few minutes away from the Lakes Region General Hospital, it seemed to take a long time to get there. We tried to prepare ourselves for the worst. We both hoped Adam’s legs were not hurt. We knew how much he loved to dance. A cassette tape in the car played “Help Me God,” by Kathy Trocolli.

Next Chapter: The hospital

Part One Hundred & Sixty Seven

“In the blink of an eye” our lives changed.

Mal and I were on our way to The Lakes Region Hospital after the New Hampshire State Police officer came to our house and told Mal that Adam had been in a serious car accident. We had no idea how serious Adam’s injuries were so the short ride to the hospital seemed to take far too long. We pulled up to the Emergency Room entrance, jumped out of the car, and ran into the entrance.

“Hi…We were told that my son Adam Howley was brought in here by ambulance. Could you tell me where he is?”

“Let me check. Oh…I’ll be right back”, the receptionist said.

A few minutes later, the receptionist returned and asked, “Could you describe Adam for me? Does he have any tattoos or piercings?”

“No. He doesn’t have any tattoos…but he does have his ears pierced. Oh…he has one eyebrow pierced. Why are you asking this?”

“I’ll be right back,” she said (without answering my question)

When she returned she asked, “Are you sure he doesn’t have any other piercings?”

“I’m pretty sure, but I’m not positive. Please…we want to see our son.”

“Well, the doctors are working on him right now. I’ll go talk to the doctors.”

“Please…we want to see him now. How serious are his injuries?!”

“I’ll be right back,” she replied.

“If he’s still alive I want to see him right now,” I insisted.

She ignored me and walked away, apparently to talk to the doctors who were with Adam. A few minutes later she came back with a doctor who said, “I’m sorry, but Adam had severe chest trauma and there was nothing we could do.”

Mal’s legs buckled but I held her up. “Please…I want to see him,” I implored.

“Give us a few minutes to clean him up,” the doctor replied.

Mal and I stood in the hospital corridor, she in stunned disbelief, while I was trying to hold myself together, thinking that Mal would need me to “be strong.” While we were waiting, the hospital Chaplain approached us to offer his condolences. “Helluva way to go,” he said. “Was he an organ donor?”

“No…I don’t think he was. This isn’t a good time right now,” I suggested while Mal cried.

“Oh. Sure. If you change your mind let me know, okay?” he said.

I ignored him. I called my sister Sharon and told her, “Sharon, Adam was killed in a car accident.”

“Oh Paul, that’s a terrible thing to say…don’t even joke about that!” She said.

“I’m not kidding. We’re at the hospital right now.”

Sharon burst into tears.

About ten minutes later Sharon’s daughter Emily rushed into the hospital. She sat next to Mal, holding her, while Mal rocked back and forth saying, “Oh, Adam, oh Adam, my baby, my baby.”

It wasn’t long before several other friends came to comfort us including our pastor Jim Morel and his wife Pam, our neighbor Lisa DiMartino, Jim and Barbara Foote, Adam’s cousin Jesse DeMund, and Emily and Liz Verhoeks. I called the main office of Laconia Christian School and told Judy Downing about the accident. “Judy, could you please get Brenda Carney (the Drama teacher) to get Cassy out of her class and use our van to bring her and her cousin Jacob to the hospital. I don’t want Cassy to know what happened because she might be too upset to drive herself here,” I explained. Judy took care of it right away and I soon met Cassy at the entrance to the Emergency Room. We embraced and she cried before I brought her in to see Mal. The news of Adam’s death spread quickly, so it wasn’t long before several of the students from Laconia Christian School came to be with Cassy. As the crowd grew, the hospital Chaplain suggested that we all move to a different area of the hospital so he brought us to a more private room away from the reception area.

Someone from the hospital asked Mal and I if we’d want to see Adam. I was reluctant but I knew I had to. We held each other and went with Cassy into the room. Adam was lying on a table and he still had the tube down his throat the paramedics had put in to try to revive him. Even though the hospital staff had “cleaned him up,” he smelled like diesel fuel (spilled into his car from the dump-truck he collided with) and he had dozens of small, bloodied cuts on his once-handsome face. His forehead and left eye was bandaged, covering some of his most serious injuries. We touched his face and I was surprised at how cold his skin was. ( For the next several months I could still remember how this felt to me.) I ran my fingers through his bright-red dyed hair and I was shocked at how coarse it felt. I hadn’t really touched his head for several years and the frequent color changes must have damaged his previously soft hair. We stood there, mostly in silence, until my sister Sharon and her husband Greg asked if they could come to see Adam. We cried as they said goodbye to him.

At one point, when I left the room where Adam was in, the Chaplain approached me and asked, “Have you reconsidered donating his organs?”

“No, I’m not donating his organs. Don’t ask us again. You’re upsetting my wife.”

My memory is blurred around this time so I can’t be sure of the “order” of things, but at some point I went back to the hospital nurses station and asked if I could use the telephone again. I called my Dad and Mom in Florida. “Dad, Adam died today in a car accident.” My father replied with an unusual, sad sound, and he assured me that they’d fly up to be with us as soon as they could. Then I called Adam’s closest friend Meridith. When I told her what had happened she told me that she was sound asleep when I called and was having a dream that Adam had come to her and he explained that everything would be alright. I told her that I’d call her back later.

I called Adam’s current girlfriend, Aleeta, but looking back, I wish I had given the news to her mother so that she could break the news to Aleeta. I just blurted out, “Adam was in a car accident and he was killed.” She cried. “I’ll call you later to talk about it,” I promised.

I called Mal’s sister Madeline but she didn’t believe me. I insisted that it was true but I had to eventually put Cassy on the phone before Madeline really believed me. I think Madeline called the other family members to give them the awful news. I can’t remember who else I called while I was at the hospital, but I know the word got around quickly.

The hospital Chaplain came by and said, “Hey, we need that room now for other people. Are you almost done?”

Next Chapter: The details

Part One Hundred & Sixty Eight

“The Details.”

The annoying hospital chaplain was trying to usher us out of the hospital. How could we just leave Adam’s body in this hospital? We knew we had to, but it seemed so strange. Eventually we left. I don’t remember much from the rest of this day but here’s what I do remember. Once I got to my home, I called several of Adam’s friends to let them know about Adam’s death. At some point I spoke to the New Hampshire police and they told me what the truck driver who collided with Adam’s car had told them. He said, “The guy was slouched over in his car, as if he had fallen asleep, and he just drifted over into my lane. I blasted my horn but he didn’t respond and as I swerved to avoid him, he crashed into the side of my truck.”

Adam was killed instantly. I was relieved to learn that my son didn’t suffer.

The police asked me if the Honda Accord that Adam was driving had any mechanical problems that could have caused the accident but I explained that the car was in excellent condition. After the police fully investigated the accident they had the wreck towed to a local junkyard.

At some point, Mal’s sister Ginny and her husband Denis were told about the accident and without hesitation, they made arrangements with their employers, packed up their car, and began to drive the 1400 miles to be with Mal and I. Mal’s sisters Carol and Madeline made travel arrangements right away to fly from Georgia and Colorado to New Hampshire. My sister Sharon and her husband Greg arranged to pick up the relatives who were flying in to the Manchester, New Hampshire airport, even the ones who were arriving very late that first night.

People from our church brought food for us that afternoon. Lots of food, but we didn’t feel much like eating. When we were eventually left alone at our home we were in a daze. Mal and I went into Adam’s bedroom and for some reason we felt the urge to clean it. We packed two large trash bags full of trash and tried to straighten up his room by putting his clothes and shoes into the drawers and closet. We found the empty two-pound bag of pistachio nuts that we had given him for Christmas and a huge bowl of pistachio nut shells on the floor. We found several small notebooks full of Adam’s hand-written poetry. I suddenly realized that I had never read any of his poetry before. Now I’d never have the opportunity to share this with him. I shut off his computer and closed his bedroom door.

Our daughter, Cassy, had gone to a Bible study at a friend’s home and when she came home she went right to sleep. Mal’s sisters Madeline and Carol arrived very late that night. I couldn’t remember anything else that happened that night but recently Carol recalled:

“ I spoke with Madeline the other day and she confirmed that we arrived the night of Adam's death. I remember that her flight was coming in around the same time as mine and that Greg picked us up. I remember that when we arrived at your home...there were flowers and baskets everywhere for Adam (Your brother Jay had made some kind of wooden basket filled with gifts of handmade soaps and breads). There were also pictures all over the table of Adam. You both were horribly distraught and I remember thinking that I could hardly see Mal's eyes because she had cried so much. Mal took Madeline and I through the story of what had happened...and told us about the "Newport" kids.”

The next day, Mal’s sister Ginny and her husband Denis arrived and we told them the story of what had happened. My Mom and Dad came from Florida to be with us but since our house was getting crowded, my sister Sharon convinced them to stay at her house for the next week. Our pastor, Jim Morel, came over to discuss our thoughts about a possible funeral or memorial service. He guided us through the basics, using his experiences with past services and he was very helpful. Jim suggested that we consider hiring Wilkinson-Beane Funeral Home to handle the arrangements so I called and set up a time to meet with them. I don’t like funerals and I’ve always heard about the predatory practices of funeral homes. They take advantage of highly emotional, grief-stricken people to sell them services, caskets and burials that are primarily a waste of money. When my grandmother died a funeral home tried to pressure my mother into buying a deluxe casket with a “quality inner-spring mattress guaranteed for twenty years.” But this guy was different. He wasn’t emotional, but he was understanding and sympathetic. He listened to our thoughts and made very few suggestions. We weren’t ready to buy a casket but we came up with some rough ideas of the cost for a normal service. We’d try to come up with definitive plans over the next few days. He helped us write the obituary and he made sure it was published in the local New Hampshire newspaper and our old hometown of Bolton’s newspaper. It was an odd task to describe Adam’s life in such a short obituary. This is what we wrote:

“Adam Dean Howley, 21, died at the Lakes Region General Hospital in Laconia on January 9, 2001, following a motor vehicle accident.

Mr. Howley was born October 10, 1979 in Framingham, Massachusetts, the son of Paul B. and Marilyn L. (Daher) Howley. He was a graduate of Lexington Christian Academy in Lexington, Massachusetts, and attended The Boston Conservatory of Music in Boston, Massachusetts. He had been accepted for the spring semester at the University of Rhode Island in Kingston, Rhode Island, as a theatre major. He starred in his first play at the age of five. He loved to sing and dance and he loved the theatre. He was very active in summer theatre and directed the play, “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown” in the summer theatre in Groton, Mass. He also enjoyed spending time in Newport, Rhode Island. Mr. Howley had lived in Bolton, Mass. For 17 years and also lived in Boston, Mass. before moving to Gilford, New Hampshire a year ago. He had worked at Friendly’s Restaurant in Laconia since July. Mr. Howley was a member of the Trinity Church in Bolton, Mass. and the Laconia Christian Fellowship Church in Laconia. Survivors include his parents, Paul and Mal Howley, his sister Cassandra Howley of Gilford, his paternal grandparents John and Marion Howley of Bolton, Mass, and his maternal grandparents Richard and Helen Daher of Florida, 24 aunts and uncles, many cousins and great cousins, as well as his very close friends Alletta, Meridith, Phil, and Victor.”

Shortly after we got home from the funeral home, Meridith and her mother came up to visit. Meridith shared lots of very personal thoughts about Adam with us that touched us deeply. After a while, we all went into Adam’s room together. We wanted Meridith to take the large stuffed dog that she had shared with Adam and she appreciated it. We told her to take anything else that would be helpful for her but I don’t remember if she took anything.

After Meridith and her Mom left we got our mail. In it was a letter from the University of Rhode Island confirming that Adam had a room on campus for the upcoming semester. If the college had mailed the letter a few days earlier, Adam wouldn’t have had to drive down there to get the college to commit to assign him a room.

Next chapter: The memorial service.

Part One Hundred & Sixty Nine

“Meridith Remembers”

Meridith Burkus, Adam’s girlfriend, told me, “I had a job interview at a restaurant in the Prudential Center on the morning of Adam’s accident. It was snowing on my walk home and I had nothing else to do so I randomly decided to go back to sleep. I was asleep when Adam fell asleep at the wheel and that’s when I had the dream. In my dream Adam and I were together and he said, ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t do it to hurt you (referring to Rhode Island) I love you.’

“Adam and I had spoken at length on the telephone that weekend. He was telling me all about how his plans to go back to college in Rhode Island were coming together. It took every ounce of self-control to not blurt out, ‘I love you so much’ but I didn’t because I knew that could veer him off the new course he was successfully on. I wanted him to start school on his own. We had decided to ‘take a break’ shortly after his 21st birthday because I knew that I would get too wrapped up in helping him get into school and get things together at the expense of my own studies. We were so attached and I felt that we needed to accomplish things on our own and then come back together a little less co-dependent. I’ve gone back and forth on this choice but in the end I spent two or three months working on myself by reconnecting with Mr. Greco and his church in Cambridge and really focusing on my studies. I think I developed the strength to get through what was about to happen. I’m not sure where I’d be if I hadn’t made the decision to do some soul searching that fall.

“You called my parents’ house in Groton and told my brother David about the accident and he gave you my telephone number in Boston. I remember exactly what you said to me. ‘Hi Meridith. It’s Paul Howley. Adam died today. There was an accident.’ Unfortunately, this has played over and over in my head so many times so I never forgot it. I remember trying to tell you ‘He was my best friend’ but I couldn’t breathe or get words out. I do remember being able to offer to call Phil Doreau but you said you wanted to contact him yourself. So, I hung up the phone and called home. I spoke to David who just said, ‘I know. Mom’s getting dressed. She’s coming to get you.’ Most all of my friends were away from Boston, on vacation, so I was pretty much all alone. I called the only person I knew was home (our mutual friend Rita) and I told her I needed to find Tori because she’d understand. Tori’s father died the year before. They told me to meet them at a fast-food place called The Wrap. I ordered a smoothie and they walked me back to my apartment. When I got there, my Mom, David, my brother Andy, and my friend Kenny and his girlfriend were waiting for me. I think someone in my family had called Kenny to tell him and he just got in his car and drove to be with me.

“When I arrived at my parent’s house I didn’t get further than the kitchen sink before I started vomiting uncontrollably. It’s probably the only reason I remember ordering a smoothie at The Wrap. I couldn’t stop. While I know that no one else slept that night, I remember forcing myself to pass out to stop throwing up. It sounds crazy, but I felt Adam’s hand on my shoulder. I held it and immediately fell asleep.

“The next morning, flowers were delivered to me. They were from my high school English teacher who remembered Adam fondly. My hometown of Groton lost three fellow students in the time Adam and I were dating, all of whom Adam either knew or knew their siblings. At the last funeral, during my freshman year of college, my English teacher said, ‘Let’s make this the last one.’ The flowers told me that she remembered that too.

“We then drove to Laconia to see you and Mal. Mal answered the door. As my Mom’s often retelling of that day, she said that Mal collapsed in my arms. My Mom says the rest of the day Mal was trying to be strong and was guarded for all of the people who came to the house that day. But with me she could actually cry freely as if she knew I had a piece of what she was going through. Perhaps that’s my Mom being poetic but she’s said it enough that I thought I’d include it in my memories of that time.

“Your parents were there and Sharon and Greg and others. I can’t recall what was said but I do remember a touching moment when your Dad talked openly about how brilliant he thought Adam was. I don’t remember what else he said but I remember his eyes that day. It was like he had lost a best friend, not his grandson.

“While I was at your house I only wanted to see one physical thing of Adam’s- his poetry book. When his interest in writing poems was sparked as a result of assignments in his first semester liberal arts at The Boston Conservatory I bought him a blank green journal. I knew that he had completely filled this book with his writings so I was glad that we found it. Adam’s cousin Emily Demund took my Mom and me to Wal-Mart to photocopy every page. I still have these copies. They are in a file cabinet in the folder I have marked, ‘I’m so sorry you’ve been reduced to a file folder.’ I like to think that title would amuse him. There’s lots of things in there like caution tape, candy necklaces, newspaper clippings from high school and printouts of emails he sent to me. Emily was concerned about me, knowing how sweet Aleeta was. I knew where Adam was at this point in his life, so I knew her without ever meeting her, but I understood that Emily’s concern was valid under the circumstances. I also particularly remember Emily seeming to not know where she fit. She was obviously in a lot of pain over Adam’s passing, but where did a cousin fit in with so many who were suffering? It had seemed like Adam had spent most of his time in New Hampshire trying NOT to fit in with Emily’s friends despite all of Emily’s efforts to reach out to him.

“Later that day, you took me back to Adam’s room and gave me the huge stuffed puppy that was on his bed. It really didn’t leave my side for quite a while. Actually, it’s sitting under the window in my room right now.

“You had already set the date for the memorial service and on my way home I made the decision to sing and read for the service. I contacted Mr. Greco and asked him if he’d play the piano for me and he agreed to do it. He also spread the news to the people at Lexington Christian Academy.

“When I got home I found that David had been sent home from school. He had gone into school but partway through the morning he sought out Mr. Byrne, Groton High School’s drama teacher, who knew Adam very well. David told him about Adam’s death and Mr. Byrne said, ‘You can’t be here, you need to go home, David.’ The rest of that week he was excused from classes to sit in the computer lab and create the poetry books that were given out at the memorial service. David was really destroyed that week.”

Next chapter: The memorial service.

Part 150 - 159

2009-12-07T08:52:00.001-08:00

Part One Hundred & Fifty

Late 1999 through early 2000 was a fun, but busy time for us. Adam was living back at home with us because he had decided not to go back to The Boston Conservatory for his second year of college. He was now working full-time to try to get out of debt. Cassy was in her sophomore year of high school at Laconia Christian School and she was involved in several sports and the drama program. Mal and I were also involved there. We had committed to organize fundraising activities to raise money for Cassy and her classmate’s senior class trip cruise.

In the past, a parent or sport coach would occasionally have some snacks available for sale during a sporting event but it was not done with any consistency. Most of the time there was no food sold there. Mal and I knew that if we committed to making full meals and snacks available at every game, we could build up a steady business. We asked the class members to bring crock-pots of food and we’d always provide hot dogs and beverages. We would usually end up selling out of everything by the end of the sporting event. Suddenly, after a few months of this, other classes and parents decided that they wanted to be able to sell food as a fundraising effort for their classes. We were told that we needed to allow the other interested groups to have equal time. We ended up only being allowed to run the snack bar one week each month.

After our successful performances of “Annie” the previous year, the school had asked if we could possibly do two plays for this year. Brenda, our director from last year was interested in directing another play but really couldn’t commit to do two plays. I volunteered to direct a play with just the middle school students while Brenda would do “Oklahoma” with the high school students. Brenda was lucky to have very enthusiastic and talented volunteers including Jane Jepsen and Margaret and Barry Armitage to help with choreography and music. The problem was that once these people had committed to work on the high school play it left our middle school play of “You’re A Good Man Charlie Brown” with no musical accompanist or choreographer. I certainly had no talent in these areas!

I approached Stephanie Goddard to see if she’d be willing to play the music for us. Stephanie played piano at her church where her husband was a pastor and Mal and I had gone there a few times so I knew she was very talented. She was reluctant to commit to such a large responsibility but she told me that she’d review the sheet music to see if she thought she could learn all it. I was confident that she could but Stephanie wasn’t so sure.
Auditions were held for the middle school play and I was surprised to have over thirty kids try out. The play consisted of only six characters but my desire for this production was to include everyone. To accomplish this, a large chorus was added to involve more of the students and two of the major characters, Lucy and Snoopy, were “double-cast” since there were four girls with outstanding talents. Each of these girls would play their part for one of the two performances.
While Stephanie was considering if she felt comfortable playing the music for our play, we began rehearsals, even though we were many months away from our performance dates. I wanted this to be fun for the students so we planned a leisurely rehearsal schedule of only twice each week. For our practices, I had rented a prerecorded musical score from the company that rented the scripts. For some reason, the company didn’t allow this soundtrack to be used for the actual performances but it gave us plenty to work with. After a few weeks, the students asked if we could rehearse more often because they were having fun! I was pleased to see the dedication in these young actors.

At the same time that we were working on this play my daughter was invited to go to Holland on her winter vacation to visit Anika, a girl who had attended Laconia Christian School the previous year. Kendra and Lindsay, two senior girls, were invited also. Kendra was on the cheerleading squad with Cassy so we knew her quite well but we didn’t know Lindsay much. Both of these girls were over eighteen years old and we thought that Cassy was still a little bit too young to go without us. Even though the girls would be staying at Anika’s parent’s home, we were uncomfortable with this idea. We suggested that we would be willing to travel there with the girls and they could stay at Anika’s while we stayed nearby at a hotel. We just wanted to be nearby in case of an emergency. Kendra wanted no part of this arrangement. She was afraid that we would somehow ruin her fun over there, but after we explained that we would not allow Cassy to go without us, Kendra changed her mind. We were now “allowed” to go with them.

Adam finally couldn’t stand his clerk job at Providian anymore so he quit and began working the night shift at The J. Jill Company packing catalog clothing orders. He didn’t like this job either but he enjoyed working with his cousin, Jesse. This didn’t last too long though.
Next chapter: Our trip to Holland and Adam’s new job.

Part One Hundred & Fifty One

“Our trip to Holland.”

Our daughter, Cassy, had been invited (along with two senior girls) to visit Anika, a former foreign exchange student, at her parents home in Holland. Cassy was only a sophomore in high school and since we were not comfortable with her traveling such a long way away from home with the two older girls, we arranged to travel with them. We’d stay in a hotel nearby while the girls would enjoy the hospitality of Anika’s parents.

So, during their winter vacation in February of 2000, we left for Logan Airport (in Boston) five hours before our scheduled flight to Holland. The trip to Boston should have taken no more than two hours but as we left New Hampshire the weather changed to sleet and freezing rain. The driving was slow and treacherous and as we neared the city of Boston we got stuck in traffic that brought us to a complete stop. If we missed our flight we would probably have to cancel our trip and the girls were not happy about that. After dealing with barely moving traffic for over an hour we finally arrived at the airport with barely enough time to make our flight. Once we were seated on the plane, we relaxed and began to be excited about this vacation.

As our plane was descending, we could see a hint of red and yellow in the fields where the world-famous Dutch tulips were beginning to bloom. When we arrived in Holland, we rented a car and drove directly to Anika’s parents’ home. It was a comfortable home in a nice neighborhood where most of the homes were attached to each other, much like the condo-townhouses in the United States. After we met the parents and visited for a short time, Mal and I left to check into our hotel. The hotel was about two miles away and it was conveniently located a few blocks away from a bus station. Even though we had rented a car we ended up using buses and trains for most of our exploring around Holland. It was a surprisingly easy system to use for our travel. We did notice, however, that most of the local people used bicycles to get around and there were thousands of bikes parked at the local train stations.

Mal and I traveled by train to Amsterdam to ride the water-taxis along the canals and we spent a couple of hours in the Vincent Van Gogh Museum. Although we enjoyed spending time with them, it was very relaxing to travel without the kids. We could stop to eat anywhere we wanted and could just sit and “people-watch.” We didn’t have to keep the kids entertained because they were having a nice time with Anika.

A few days later, Anika’s mother, Tina, decided to take some time off from work to show us all some of the “highlights” of the country. We made sure that Cassy, Kendra, and Lindsay were okay with us tagging along and they assured us that would be fine. We all went to Delft, a rural town famous for the production of fine china and pottery. We all went out to lunch at a local restaurant and Tina recommended that we try “poffertjes.” These were small, fluffy, round, pancake-type treats that are covered in butter. These were a big hit with all of us! After lunch we headed to a large flea market and shopped for an hour or two. We were surprised to see that high-quality leather coats could be bought for $20 but after looking through several dozen booths, none could be found to fit us because we were just too short. We later learned that The Netherlands had the second tallest population in the world so not much is available for little people like us.

Anika’s mother had invited us to their home for a great home-cooked meal that night. When we arrived there we learned that because of the small size of most refrigerators in The Netherlands, it was common for people to go to the market or grocery store several times each week to buy fresh produce, meats, and baked goods. Conveniently, their home was located just minutes from a market. (Now, years later, Mal and I have adopted this kind of grocery shopping.)
Cassy enjoyed her time in Holland but she did have a few difficult moments when her eighteen-year old friends tried to encourage her to have an alcoholic drink. It was legal for them but not for Cassy so she passed but her friends kept pressuring her to try it. She held firm but it made her uncomfortable. It was clear that the two other girls really wanted to party while they were there but they were probably intimidated by Mal and I being there even though we weren’t there to chaperone them. Overall, they behaved themselves and we all had a good time. We hope to revisit Holland again someday.
Next Chapter: As I near the end of my story, it’s time to acknowledge some people.

My Life With Comic Books: A History of a Comic Book Store: Part 151.5

As I near the end of my story (believe it or not I think I can actually finish this in the next few months) I think it’s time for me to acknowledge and thank some of the people who’ve helped me with this project. Several years ago, I was asked by David LeBlanc, the publisher of Comic Book Electronic Magazine, to write a few columns about my experiences in the comic book industry. I figured that I could commit to writing a twelve-part series, but as I began to write it I decided that there was much more to this story than just my business. The comic book business was fun, exciting, and far more prosperous than I had ever imagined but it was just a small part of my life. Now, keep in mind, I’ve made dozens of life-long friends because of my business, but the friends and family are far more important than selling comic books and collectibles. But I also realize that without the business, my life would not be the same. Everyone I’ve met has influenced or affected my life in some way and it’s what has made me (for better or worse) who I am today.
First, I’d like to thank my parents for their love and constant support no matter how crazy my ideas were. They never told me that I couldn’t do it, even when I was a just a kid. They may have thought I was nuts, but they didn’t squash my dreams by telling me. Mal and I were both influenced so much by our parents, by their successes as well as failures.

I’m also very grateful to Jeannine Verhoeks. For some reason, Jeannine offered to help me by correcting all of the grammatical errors that I had in this story. At the time of her offer I projected that the story would be about forty chapters long. I’m sure she had no idea that the story would end up as long as it did but she’s never failed to do a great job.

I know most of you have very busy lives so I’m surprised and thankful for those of you who have actually read this whole story! I’m also very grateful for the dozens of readers who took the time to comment on this story. Some of you have commented occasionally and I appreciate that. The following friends (in no particular order) have really “blessed” me with their frequent email comments:

Arthur Harrison, Dottie Shaftner, Cousin Steve, Daphne Moreau, Louise Ruth, Steve Ruth, Grace Noble, David LeBlanc, Madeline Paladino, Carol Walsingham, Barbara Foote, Janet Miller, David M. Lynch, Michael Warshaw, Donna Reichle, Don Phelps, Andy Fish, Bryan Parys, David Howley, Paul Dinsdale, Gail Zayka, Brenda Carney, and Meridith Burkus.
Thanks for being part of my life!

Next chapter: Adam makes me laugh.

Part One Hundred & Fifty Two

Now, although there were times that Adam frustrated me so much that I’d lose my temper, there were also many times that his sense of humor would really crack me up.

Mal and I were having a cookout and we invited about twelve people who we didn’t normally get together with socially. We wanted to get to know more of the people from our community and our church. Before the guests arrived, Adam took my video-camcorder into the bathroom and stood on a chair high up in one corner. He videotaped the toilet. Later, during the cookout, the pastor of our church (a very private guy) used the bathroom. When the pastor came out of the bathroom into the family room it appeared as though we had just all watched him in the bathroom because Adam was now playing the videotape that he had recorded earlier. After a few uncomfortable moments, we let the pastor in on the joke.

At some point in his life, Adam began to laugh about bacon. He loved bacon but thought it was funny that America seemed to be obsessed with adding bacon to sandwiches that already had enough fat to clog our arteries. One day he showed me the illustration on a hand-dryer in a public restroom and explained that it appeared that if I pressed the button, bacon would come out. (See my photo) This still gives me a little chuckle whenever I see this illustration on a hand-dryer.

I could also get Adam to laugh pretty easily. One day, returning from a trip together, we stopped at a rest area on a highway. Adam was following a short distance behind me and as I entered the bathroom I noticed there was no one else in there. By the time Adam entered the rest room, I was on my knees pretending to use the low urinal. This really struck him as a very funny visual gag and we both laughed for quite a while. Simple things but they struck us as humorous. Although these particular three examples are about bathrooms most of the things that made Adam and I laugh were not!

Unfortunately, there were too many times when we weren’t amused by each other. Adam frequently found a way to drive me crazy, sometimes with just small things. I know he didn’t usually do these things purposely, but I expected so much from him and when he didn’t give his best effort it would make me angry. Sometimes it would cause me to go into “a rage.” I’d be screaming at him and even this venting wouldn’t lessen my anger. This just made things worse. It had adversely affected our relationship in the past and I didn’t want this to continue now that Adam had moved back home at our request. Through it all, Adam somehow managed to love me. When he was in college, he had no money to buy us a gift for Christmas, so he wrote this poem to express his feelings:

“As we grow old,
Time moves quickly.
Too quickly for parents and children.
Mother,
We have lost the time
When I slept in your arms.
There are many nights
When I am alone
That I imagine
Myself
Sleeping on your lap
But still I do not call.
Father,
Time has moved on.
Past cars
On the braided carpet
To cars in the driveway.
And my memories of games
And stories
Have, over time,
Become tainted with
Arguments and things
Muttered
Under our breath.
As a child,
I missed so my chances
To tell you
I love you.
Now, as an adult,
I will not.
I love you both.”

I realized that Adam was still doing things that drove me crazy but I wanted his time living with us to be peaceful and productive. How could I control my rage? Mal kept trying to convince me that Adam’s life was in God’s hands but I was so accustomed to being in control of my own life that I wanted Adam’s life to be the same. So I tried not to let Adam drive me nuts. When he’d do something that bothered me, I’d try to calmly leave the room before I would get too angry but this really wasn’t a good long-term solution.

One day, when I was getting near the breaking point, I decided to ask God for relief from my building anger. (I had never considered this before.) Now, I know many of you will be skeptical about this, but I’m not kidding, within moments my rage was gone. From then on, when Adam would do things that would have previously triggered my anger, I’d use these times to calmly discuss things with him. My crazy anger-blow-ups were gone! I have to admit that I would still occasionally get irritated with Adam, but as far as my extreme anger goes, I had been healed by the power of God. I certainly wish I had prayed for this healing many years before.

Next chapter: Charlie Brown and Oklahoma.

Part One Hundred & Fifty Three

I had decided to produce and direct the Laconia Christian School’s middle school musical of “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown” and I was committed to handling most of the business aspects of the high school musical of “Oklahoma” that Brenda Carney was directing. Brenda had secured the talents of Barry and Margaret Armitage and Jane Jepsen to handle the music and choreography chores of Oklahoma. Dennis Emmerton, a talented carpenter and parent of some of the students, offered to build the set for Brenda.

I was initially concerned that I wouldn’t be able to get help with the middle school play. Cassy was playing the role of “Ado Annie” in Oklahoma but she was willing to help me with the choreography for Charlie Brown. Stephanie Goddard agreed to play the piano for the play so I was relieved that this very important task was in talented hands. Belinda Simpson and Lyndel Jackman offered to help me with set construction. It was a good thing, because I have no skills at all in construction.

The high school play was going to be performed at a local public high school with beautiful facilities. The auditorium was much larger than the facility we had used the year before when we put on “Annie.” I was a little concerned that we wouldn’t be able to sell that many tickets. I’d hate to have any unfilled seats! I created a diagram of the seating and began to pressure the students and parents to buy their reserved-seat tickets as soon as possible so that they’d have their choice of the best seats in the theatre. Cassy played every sport offered for girls at the school and we attended almost every game, even the boys’ sports, so I used these opportunities to sell tickets to the play to the other parents and students in the audience. It didn’t take too much pressuring because the play from the year before had been so good that parents were eager and willing to buy tickets for this year’s high school play. I was concerned that selling advance tickets for a middle school play might not be quite as easy.

The play we were doing for the middle school, “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown” was written to have six characters. I knew that if I included more students in the play we’d be able to sell tickets to their parents and grandparents so I wrote parts for a large choir. This consisted of about fifteen kids and I added a part for the character of “Pigpen.” I hoped that this would result in at least one hundred advance ticket sales. The school couldn’t afford to actually lose money on one of our plays so I needed to be very careful with the budget for the middle school play. The royalty fee to perform this play was almost one thousand dollars. We certainly couldn’t afford to rent a theatre for our performances because the cheapest of the nearby venues charged at least $1500 to use their facilities for two days. We decided to do the play in the gymnasium at our own school. We had about 175 chairs available and we had an old, plywood stage that came in several pieces. We would have no stage “wings” or backstage rooms to use so we knew this was going to present a few problems but we really had no alternative. It wasn’t ideal but it would have to do.

I had a videotape of a performance that was co-directed by my son Adam a few years previous so I showed the students how the play looked. This helped the actors understand the progression of the story. I decided to change quite a few bits of the “blocking” to keep the action flowing more. This was something I had learned by watching Brenda work as the director of last year’s play. The kids learned their lines very quickly but the songs needed much more work. I’m not a singer so I asked for help from a woman who had recently moved to the area and was working as a music-vocal teacher, giving private singing lessons at the school. Dona Lynn Curry had worked as a performer for many years and she was a very talented performer and musical director. Cassy had been taking lessons from other vocal teachers for several years but she learned so much more since she had switched to lessons from Dona Lynn. I was disappointed when Dona Lynn told me that she just couldn’t fit the play into her crowded schedule.

Someone recommended that I ask Cathy Stephenson, a parent of a school student who had been volunteering at the school teaching chorus to the younger students. With the coaching from both Cathy and Stephanie, the actors learned their songs. Abel Broughton, the actor playing Charlie Brown, was taking private vocal lessons from Donna Lynn and he used much of his time with her to master his songs. Everything was working out great.

As we neared our performance dates I needed to step in and help out with some of the props. I decided I’d paint Snoopy’s doghouse a nice bright red. I set the doghouse up on our makeshift stage and began painting it, holding the paintbrush in my right hand while I was holding the gallon of paint in my hand. I was all alone in the gymnasium because all of the students were currently in the classrooms. The gym floor had just been replaced with a brand-new textured vinyl tile and the students were instructed to be very careful with this expensive upgraded floor. As I was leisurely painting one side of the doghouse, I fell off of the stage and landed directly on my head, almost losing consciousness. As I was falling, all I could think of was how much grief I was going to get because of the nearly full gallon of bright red paint that was going to splash all over the gym floor! While my head and neck throbbed with pain, I cleaned and scrubbed for over an hour to clean up my careless accident. By the time some students came into the gym my mess was mostly cleaned up and I realized how lucky I was that I had not broken my neck. I could have been lying on the floor, undiscovered, for over an hour.

Next chapter: The two plays are performed.

Part One Hundred & Fifty Four

The high school musical of “Oklahoma” was going to be performed one month before the middle school play of “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown.” We had sold almost all of the available tickets for both shows of “Oklahoma” and we had sold a lot of tickets for the middle school play, much to the surprise of many people who didn’t believe that there would be that much interest in it.

Very nice-- but conservative—people governed the school so Brenda was a bit concerned about some suggestive lyrics to the song, “Kansas City.” To keep everyone happy, Barry and Margaret Armitage cleverly changed them. This song was sung by John, Cassy’s boyfriend. There were also concerns about the kissing scenes in the play. In one scene, John would lift up Cassy and twirl her around and end up kissing her. In the big “dream sequence” the characters of “Curly,” played by Andrew Hare and “Laurey,” played by Nicole Behan were supposed to be madly in love with each other and the end of the scene called for a passionate kiss. It was decided that John would still kiss Cassy but Andrew’s kiss would be a delicate kiss on the forehead of Nichole. Dramatically, it worked perfectly and it pointed out the distinct difference between the “flirty” affection of John’s character and the true love and respect that Andrew’s character had for his girl. A few years later, Andrew and Nichole were actually married.

When Brenda had chosen to produce this play many of the students complained, “Oh, this play is stupid! Can’t we do something else?” On the night of the last performance they were all sad that it was over and they were eager to participate in next year’s play! It was a fantastic show that was thoroughly enjoyed by everyone. Well, almost everyone. One man complained about a scene that he thought was “making fun” of the idea of suicide. About a week later the school board got a lengthy letter from someone who had broken down, scene by scene, the things they thought were offensive in the play. While the school board took these complaints seriously, they also understood that we couldn’t please everyone.

A month later, it was time for the production of the middle school play “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown.” Although I was the director, I was also the only person who knew the show thoroughly enough to run the spotlight because many of the scenes in this show are performed in a “black-out” technique. It was complicated but it worked. I wasn’t needed up front to help any of the students with their lines because they had all worked hard and were very sure of their parts. Stephanie Goddard, assisted by Caleb Parys on the drums, played the music perfectly.

The two performances were interestingly different because different actors played Snoopy and Lucy each night. Several people bought tickets to both performances to see the differences. Cassandra came to see both of the shows but my son, Adam, only came to one of the performances. The play was so much fun and the young actors all did a great job. Looking back, it still surprises me that we could have sold 350 tickets to a middle school play. I was hoping to do another play with the middle-school but my life drastically changed the next year and I just couldn’t do it.

Next chapter: The Prodigal Son

Part One Hundred & Fifty Five

As Cassy’s sophomore year of high school came to a close, Mal and I realized that things would be quite different for us. Adam worked as a waiter at a nearby “Friendly’s” restaurant and his scheduled hours changed from week to week. Cassy also worked at the same restaurant but on different shifts so we always ended up with one of our children at home with us. We loved our kids but we knew we’d never have peace and quiet while they were home. We began a search for a “get-away” cottage on a lake. We gave our requirements to a real estate agent and she began looking for an inexpensive place for us to buy. We couldn’t really afford to buy anything on Lake Winnipesaukee because it was the largest and most popular lake. Even a small, run-down cottage would sell for $500,000 on this lake. Since we lived in “The Lakes Region” of New Hampshire, there were dozens of other lakes with available cottages. She drove us around for several weeks but we didn’t find anything that seemed right for us. The search would continue.

Cassy and Adam usually got along quite well, but there were some problems now that Adam was back with us. He shared a bathroom with Cassy and the rule was that they would alternate cleaning the bathroom each week. Cassy was very thorough when it was her turn to clean it but Adam didn’t do a very good job. He’d leave wet towels on the floor, his whiskers around the sink, and he hated cleaning the shower. This made Cassy upset that he could get away with this poor cleaning job. Mal and I would ask Adam to do a better job but it didn’t seem to make much of a difference.

A short while before, at Adam’s request, we turned over Adam’s finances to him again. Although the “envelope system” had wiped out most of Adam’s debt (other than his large college loans) he insisted that he could now handle his money. Within a couple of months he was deeper in debt than ever before. Handling money just wasn’t Adam’s strong point. This also frustrated Cassy because she was very careful with her money and she worked hard at developing good savings habits.

Cassy asked me one day why I treated Adam differently than I treated her. How could I put up with so much from him? I related this parable from Luke 15:11-31.
Jesus said: "There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, 'Father, give me my share of the estate.' So he divided his property between them.

13 "Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14 After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.

17 "When he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father's hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18 I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.' 20 So he got up and went to his father.

"But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.
21 "The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.'
22 "But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. 24 For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate.
25 "Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 27 'Your brother has come,' he replied, 'and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.'
28 "The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29 But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'
31 " 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' "
I explained to Cassy that I was just so happy to have Adam back with us that I could overlook many things that would have previously driven me crazy. We loved both of our kids but I felt that we had been given a second chance to teach Adam and I wouldn’t allow myself to be discouraged. Cassy seemed to understand.

Next chapter: Cassy’s heart gets broken.

Part One Hundred & Fifty Six

As the 1999-2000 school year was ending, things seemed great. Cassy finished her sophomore year at Laconia Christian School with a straight “A” grade. She was also actively involved in a local abstinence program under the supervision of Julie Goetz from the Lakes Region Pregnancy Care Center. Cassy traveled to several local public schools to encourage the high school students to abstain from sexual activity and the students seemed to be open to Cassy’s “teaching.”

Adam was still working at the local “Friendly’s” restaurant while he was living with us but he really missed being around his friends in Rhode Island. He’d frequently drive to Newport to spend weekends with them and he’d come back late on Sunday night, exhausted and not too excited about going back to work. We talked about how important it is to enjoy your job. I tried to convince Adam to run a local collectibles show and we spent a day scouting the area for possible locations to run such a show. I wanted him to eventually have a reliable, ongoing source of income and since I had experience running collectibles shows, this seemed like a good idea. He also liked the idea that I’d be around to help him get started. But as we evaluated the different places to rent, Adam began to think that he’d prefer to run teen dance parties or “raves.” It took a while but I finally convinced him that the possibility of lawsuits because of injuries or other trouble wouldn’t be worth the risk.

I didn’t want to do all of the work necessary to start a collectibles show by myself. I was willing to do it with Adam but then he decided he didn’t want to put in the effort to run these shows either. I guess his passion just wasn’t the same as mine for collectibles.

Cassy had been dating a guy named John for about a year. Though she was only sixteen years old, she had true, strong feelings for him. (We couldn’t say much; Mal and I fell in love when we were only seventeen!) She was convinced that John was serious about a meaningful, long-term relationship. He was always respectful to Mal and I and he understood Cassy’s commitment to refrain from physical intimacy until marriage. He seemed okay with this until the summer, when the school took all of the male and female volleyball players to a volleyball camp in Pennsylvania. While they were away, John suggested that they break up. Cassy was heartbroken. John claimed “he wanted to get closer to God.” What he actually meant was that he wanted to get closer to one of the other girls on the volleyball team. Cassy felt betrayed when she realized that John wasn’t being honest with her. She cried a lot for many weeks. Nothing I could say to her could ease her pain and this made me feel helpless. As her Dad, I just wanted her to be happy and healthy. I was accustomed to being able to deal with any situation but now I couldn’t take away my own daughter’s heartbreak. What could be worse than this? We’d soon find out.

Next chapter: Cassy makes a big decision about her college choice (even though she’s only just beginning her Junior year of high school)

Part One Hundred & Fifty Seven

Although we had only been living in New Hampshire for two years we had made some very good friends. Through our involvement at Laconia Christian School and our church, we began to hang around with Barbara and Jim Foote and my sister Sharon and her husband Greg. We had also become friends with Mike and Liz Verhoeks. As you may know, it’s not always easy for couples to become friends. Many times, the wives may get along great but the husbands may not. In most of our relationships, our friends like Mal but I’m not as likeable. In this case, we all liked each other!

Mike and Liz owned Laconia Pottery, a retail store, selling mostly Victorian gift items and the hand-made pottery that Mike created. Mike had been a geophysicist for a major oil company but when that industry slowed down he decided to pursue his passion for pottery full-time.

One day, as we were visiting Liz at her store, Mal suggested that Liz should add rubber stamps and card-making supplies to her inventory. Mal told Liz about her experiences with her own stamp store and how much fun and profit she could have if she developed a customer base for these products. My comic book and collectible store had bought the remaining inventory from Mal and her partner Diane several years ago hoping to be able to continue the successful business they had developed inside of our Fitchburg location, but our employees just didn’t have enough interest to make this work. They had a huge sale to try to get rid of the inventory and eventually just packed up the remainder and stored it in the back room. I suggested that we could put the leftover inventory of stamps and supplies into Liz’s store with no risk to Liz. We’d share the profit on any of our old inventory. Liz seemed reluctant to try this, mostly because it wasn’t necessarily a “good fit” with the overall theme of her gift shop, but she decided to try it anyway.

I drove down to our Fitchburg store and was very disappointed to find that we only had a few boxes of leftover stamping stuff. Apparently they had sold most of the inventory when they had the big “blow-out” sale. Liz made some space for the inventory but because there wasn’t very much left to begin with, she didn’t sell much in the first few weeks. Mal offered to teach stamping classes in order to create some demand for the stamping products and within a short time the inventory began to sell. Liz conservatively ordered some new products and she was surprised at how fast it sold. There were times when customers would stand by and watch her unpack newly arrived stamps and accessories and buy them before she could even get them onto the store shelves. Liz became convinced that these products could eventually out-sell her inventory of gift items and she began to allocate more and more store space to stamps, inks, accessories and decorative papers. It still amazes me how little things, like Mal’s decision to open a rubber stamp store all those years ago, can change the lives of those with whom we later come in contact. The following story is taken directly from Liz’s store website:

“Stamping Memories was officially born in October of 2002. A new sign was hung under another sign, which for eight years had served to direct locals and visitors to one of central New Hampshire's most popular destinations, Laconia Pottery. What was originally established as an upscale gallery featuring unique gifts and fine pottery, The Gallery at Laconia Pottery began to change focus in 1998 shortly after owners, Mike and Elizabeth Verhoeks, met and became friends with Paul and Mal Howley. The Howley's had recently moved from Massachusetts to Laconia, New Hampshire, so their daughter could attend Laconia Christian High School.

“Mal Howley had owned a rubber stamping store located within her husband's large comic book and sports memorabilia store, That's Entertainment, in Fitchburg, Massachusetts. Prior to their eventful meeting, Elizabeth had no knowledge of rubber stamps except for those used to identify a bill as PAID or a check as VOID. Mal was an avid rubber stamper and when she showed Elizabeth some of the beautiful cards she had made with stamps, ink pads, and paper, Elizabeth was surprised and impressed. The Howley's suggested that rubber stamps might be a nice addition to The Gallery's line of merchandise because they were becoming quite the "hot trend" in Massachusetts. Mal offered to teach classes and do demonstrations at The Gallery so customers would see how to use the rubber stamps. Elizabeth was skeptical about how these "craft items" would sell in her shop but, after considerable thought and discussion with her husband, Mike, she decided that since Paul and Mal were such successful retail store owners in Massachusetts, and seemed genuinely interested in the success of The Gallery, she would trust their advice and try a few rubber stamps in the shop. It turned out to be the best business decision she has ever made--so far!

“What began as a small experiment in a new product line, slowly began to move the shop in a completely new direction. As the number of classes grew, the need for another instructor arose. Debbie Monell, a close friend of Elizabeth's and already part-time employee of The Gallery, offered to help Mal with the teaching. She was a fairly new stamper but had quickly learned the basics from Mal by attending regular classes. Her creativity coupled with her outgoing personality and her familiarity with the shop, made her a natural. She continued teaching classes and working part time until she accepted a position with Laconia Christian School in 1999. In May of 2005 Debbie returned to Stamping Memories as a part time employee.

“Now, an unforgettable seven years later, the Verhoeks' and the Howley's are the best of friends. The Gallery at Laconia Pottery is now Stamping Memories--one of New Hampshire's finest rubber stamping and scrap book stores. There you will find cabinets lined with hundreds of great rubber stamps, walls of beautiful paper, shelves of colorful inkpads, rows of embellishments--all that a rubber stamp or scrap book enthusiast could ever hope to find. Pride in the way inventory is displayed is key at Stamping Memories. Because it was formerly a gift gallery, some beautiful remnants still remain which give the shop its wonderfully charming atmosphere. From the many windows adorned with lovely European lace curtains, to the gorgeous silk flowers filling giant containers, Stamping Memories is truly a different kind of stamping and scrap book store. Visitors to the shop have been overheard describing it as "the nicest stamping and scrap book store I've ever seen". Owner, Elizabeth, simply desires it to be a pleasurable experience for each and every person who enters her shop.

“These days, classes are taught several times a week at Stamping Memories, with an emphasis placed on teaching proper techniques and developing creativity. Often students travel from many miles away to attend a myriad of classes taught by several gifted instructors who enjoy sharing their wealth of knowledge and enthusiasm with those who are eager to learn. Elizabeth is careful to select teachers who have a passion for rubber stamping and scrap booking and who willingly stay abreast of the latest trends and techniques. It is Elizabeth's goal to keep classes at Stamping Memories fresh and new with as much creative variety as possible in accordance with the ever changing world of stamping and scrap booking styles and trends.

“The store has experienced tremendous growth each year since adding rubber stamps despite a sometimes sluggish economy. The future continues to look bright. The additional emphasis on scrap booking is drawing new customers daily. An increased focus on family, since the national tragedy of September 11, 2001, has made scrap booking even more popular. People seem more interested than ever in preserving their memories for future generations and Stamping Memories strives to provide their customers with the best the industry has to offer.

Stamping Memories carries only the finest quality rubber stamps, papers and accessories. Elizabeth and her team are always on the look out for new and unique lines to add to the store. Occasionally they travel to other parts of the country to see what is in vogue and to network with other storeowners.

A visit to Stamping Memories is well worth the trip and it will most likely become one you’ll make as often as you can.”

Next chapter: Cassy makes a decision about college, even though she’s only just beginning her junior year of high school.

Part One Hundred & Fifty Eight

In June of 2000 my store in Worcester, Massachusetts came up with an interesting idea for an in-store event. Dave Hartwell and Ken Carson were both fans of the creativity of Frank Cho, a popular independent artist-writer who created the newspaper comic strip “Liberty Meadows.” He hadn’t done any New England appearances and they knew he’d draw a decent crowd if he’d agree to do a store appearance. On August 5th our store was packed with fans eager to meet Frank Cho. Frank drew sketches, signed autographs and visited with the customers for several hours. The event was a big success.

The summer of 2000 went by quickly and it was almost time for Cassy to begin her junior year of high school. She remembered the “last minute” frustration Adam had when he procrastinated in making his decision as to which college he’d attend and she didn’t want to repeat that. Cassy, Mal and I attended an exclusively Christian “college fair” in Concord, New Hampshire in the very beginning of Cassy’s junior year of high school. We had decided that it would be best if Cassy attended a Christian university because of our negative experience with the secular college where Adam had gone for his first year. While walking around the convention room filled with college representatives eagerly trying to entice the high school students to attend their colleges, Cassy found a booth that interested her. It was Palm Beach Atlantic University, a college from South Florida, who cleverly used their easy access to the beach and the warm weather to attract teens to their campus. It was also one of the very few colleges that offered a degree program in Musical Theatre. Most offered a theatre program and a music program, but not a musical theatre program. Although Cassy gathered information from other colleges at this college fair, she had pretty much made up her mind that she’d go to Palm Beach Atlantic University. Mal and I figured that Adam would end up living in Boston or New York City, Cassy would be in Florida, and we had planned to move to North Carolina. This way, we’d be halfway between them so it would be easy to visit them periodically.

At one time, Mal and I went on a vacation with our friends, Mike and Liz Verhoeks, to explore some potential areas of North Carolina for the near future. We loved the forests and hills there because it reminded us of the beauty of New England but North Carolina has a much warmer climate. I was eager to escape the harsh winters of the northeast. While we were on this trip, Mike asked,” Why don’t you consider moving to Florida?” Mal said, “I have no interest in living in Florida.” Although we’ve always enjoyed our many trips to Florida, it just didn’t seem like a place we’d want to live. Most of our trips were during the intense heat of the summers and we mostly went to the big theme parks where we spent hours every day on hot asphalt, mingling with large crowds of people. We preferred the rural setting of North Carolina.

In October, Adam turned twenty-one years old. We invited several of our New Hampshire friends and Phil Doreau, Adam’s best friend from high school, over to our home for a birthday party. Adam wore a t-shirt that advertised our comic book store and had a picture Insect Man, the super-hero I created, on the front. This was the same t-shirt that Adam wore when he was a young child, but now, it fit him.

Now that Adam was twenty-one, I was eager to get him to go to the Foxwoods Casino with me. I had hoped that it would be a fun time of father-son bonding. Adam asked the manager of the restaurant where he worked for two days off and I was excited about the trip. At the last minute, Adam was asked to work. He needed the money and I knew it was more important for him to be a responsible adult than go to a casino. There’d be plenty of time for fun in the future.

By the middle of November I was very eager to go with Adam to the casino. I figured that if we waited much longer we’d be too close to Thanksgiving and then we’d be into winter. I didn’t want to make the three and a half hour trip in icy conditions. I pressured Adam to schedule his two days off for the next Tuesday and Wednesday because the minimum bets would be more affordable for a beginning player like Adam. Once Adam confirmed his days off I called the casino and arranged for an overnight stay in the hotel that is on-site. The hotel room was complimentary for me if I redeemed the “Wampum Points” I had accumulated during previous visits.

We spent two days at the Foxwoods Casino and had a great time. I won a few hundred dollars while Adam lost four hundred of my dollars. I didn’t mind giving him money to play, mostly because I knew this wasn’t going to be a frequent thing for him to do. He didn’t have enough money of his own to risk gambling and he knew better.

On our three and a half hour trip home, I finally took the opportunity to talk seriously with Adam about his future. After urging him to think and plan ahead for his life, I asked him the clichéd question that many parents ask their kids, “Where do you see yourself five years from now?” Adam replied, “I see myself married to Meridith and, hopefully, working in a job that I enjoy.” That sounded good to me.

Next chapter: I set up at a local shopping mall to buy collectibles.

Part One Hundred & Fifty Nine

While living in New Hampshire in the fall of 2000, I realized there had never been a good comic book store in the area and it occurred to me that there might be some nice, undiscovered comics and collectibles stored in the attics and basements of some of the older homes here. I met with the manager of a nearby shopping mall to discuss the possibility of renting out some space in the center of the mall, explaining that I didn’t want to sell anything there. I just wanted to buy collectibles that people would bring into the mall. I planned to spend some money advertising that I would be there the whole week to evaluate any vintage items that local residents brought into the mall. The mall manager was smart enough to realize that this could possibly attract hundreds of potential shoppers into this normally very slow mall so he agreed to rent me space for a few hundred dollars.

I wrote up some small and medium sized display advertisements offering to buy and appraise collectibles and brought the ads to the three local newspapers. With only about five hundred dollars budgeted for print ads I needed to be sure they got good placement in the newspapers. I didn’t want them to be buried with lots of other small ads. I suggested that they would be noticed more if they were placed on the upper right corner of the right-hand page and the ad salesperson eventually agreed to this placement. The ads would read, “Need Cash For The Holidays? We pay cash for: Comic Books, Barbie Dolls, Model Kits, Trading Cards, CDs, Records, Video Tapes, Old Toys and Games, GI Joe Dolls, Sports Cards, Old Calendars, Matchbox and Hot Wheels Cars, Beatles Items, Video Games and Video Systems, Star Wars Toys, and more. For free appraisals call Paul, or visit our booth at The Belknap Mall.”

These advertisements began their run the night before I was to be in the mall. Some small classified ads also ran a few days before my time in the mall began. Most importantly, I sent out press releases to the local newspapers and radio stations to let them know that I would be buying and appraising collectibles and that I had hoped to spend at least $50,000 while I was here. Two newspapers ran short articles about my upcoming appearance at the mall using mostly the information I had provided in the press release. One article appeared in the Laconia Daily Sun and it said:

“Local collector-dealer Paul Howley, (owner of That’s Entertainment, New England’s largest collectibles store) wants to spend $250,000 on comic books, old toys and games, old books and magazines, GI Joe dolls, Barbie dolls, and more during the week of November 6-12.

“Paul Howley of Gilford, New Hampshire, is considered by many to be one of the most knowledgeable collectible dealers on the East coast. His store in Worcester, Massachusetts was the winner of the prestigious 1997 “Will Eisner Spirit of Comics Award” naming That’s Entertainment the best comic book and collectibles store in the world.

“Paul Howley has been involved with the collectibles market since the 1960s, and in 1990 authored ‘The Man From Uncle Collector’s Price Guide.’ He also served for many years as an advisor to ‘The Comic Book Price Guide.’

“Howley’s business was recently the subject of a feature article in the national publication ‘INC. Magazine.’

“Howley will be available at the Belknap Mall in Belmont each day to make free appraisals and offers on a vast assortment of collectibles including comic books, old toys and games, Barbie dolls, GI Joe dolls, old magazines and books, sports cards, trading cards, model kits, Matchbox and Hot Wheels cars, Beatles items, old calendars, CDs, records, video tapes, Star Wars toys, video games and systems, and much more.”

This was almost word-for-word from my press release!

On the first day of my mall space rental, I arrived early and set up my booth that consisted of four eight-foot long tables that I arranged in a square, leaving space for me inside. I used the tables to display rare and interesting toys, comic books and sports cards to give people an idea of the kinds of items I was interested in buying. Now, all I needed was for people to bring me things to buy.

Next chapter: Working alone at my mall booth from 9am-9pm makes a long, boring day.

Part 140 - 149

2009-12-07T08:51:00.003-08:00

Part One Hundred & Forty

My company was being run by an overall company manager while I was living over one hundred miles away in New Hampshire. Now that I no longer employed him, I was in trouble. I had to find someone I could trust to take over the day-to-day operations and take care of the finances and payroll. I had some very good employees at the time but none had been trained to handle all of these important and confidential tasks.

My long-time friend and employee, Pat, was currently managing the store that we opened in Woonsocket, Rhode Island, but the store wasn’t growing fast enough or generating the profit necessary to keep it open. I talked Pat into closing the Rhode Island store and coming to work at the Worcester location to manage things while I decided what would be the best for the company. I had known Pat for many years and I trusted him completely. In order to pay Pat the amount of money he needed to support his family we agreed that he would begin to list some of our huge inventory on eBay. The extra income that this Internet auction site would provide would help pay his new salary and his health insurance premiums. For this idea to work, Pat would need to list about twenty auction lots each day. This seemed like a good solution for both of us. I now had a trusted friend overseeing my business and Pat would be able to provide a decent income for his family that he had “uprooted” from their home in Pittsburgh to Massachusetts.

We informed our Rhode Island store landlord that we were moving out. Since the landlord was actually the same guy who was renting out half of my Worcester store building, he had no problem with it. He was a great guy to do business with. We packed up a huge moving truck and brought the entire inventory and all of the fixtures back to our Worcester store location. For the next several months Pat tried to sell this excess inventory on eBay. He sold quite a lot of inventory this way but it just wasn’t enough to justify the expenses of his salary plus the high eBay fees. Pat’s wife really wanted to be back in her hometown and her unhappiness in Massachusetts put so much pressure on Pat that he finally decided to quit and return his family to Pennsylvania. I knew I’d miss him because Pat was such a good friend, but he had to take care of his family and he wasn’t really very happy working at my store.

It was around this time that Ken, one of my part-time employees, told me he was willing to increase his hours at the store. It didn’t take him long to learn all of the necessary details to effectively run the two stores. I hoped that this time I had the right manager.

One day, our son Adam called to invite Mal and me down to Massachusetts to see him perform in “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” at his college. We were eager to see him tackle such a fun role. We drove to the college and were surprised to see Adam in his colorful costume. He had also dyed his hair a strange green color for the role. Adam was upset when we arrived because this was a student-directed play and the college had now, a few hours before the play was to start, decided that they wouldn’t allow the performance to begin because the director hadn’t legally gotten the “rights” to put on the play. Students were frantically trying to get everything smoothed out but it became clear that this play wasn’t going to happen. The actors were angry with the college professor who was overseeing the project because he should have been aware of this potential problem. Apparently, according to several students, this professor was lazy and wasn’t very good at his job. We visited with Adam for a few hours and went back to New Hampshire disappointed, but we knew we’d see Adam perform some other time.

Next chapter: We get a horrible phone call about our friends in Colorado.

Part One Hundred & Forty One

We became friends with Art and Suisei Goguen many years ago. Our kids were close in age to their kids and they frequently played together. Eventually the Goguen family moved away to Colorado and began a new life in a beautiful rural area. Mal and Cassy traveled out there to visit them and experienced several new activities including horseback riding up and down mountain ranges. On May 24, 1999, we received a phone call from our long-time friend, Barbara Weatherbee informing us that Art and Suisei Goguen had lost their daughter Arwen to Juvenile Diabetes just one day before she would have turned fifteen years old.

We quickly made arrangements to fly out to Colorado for Arwen’s funeral service. Our son, Adam, wasn’t able to come with us. Several of our other friends wanted to go too, but were unable to get the time off from their jobs. Art’s close friend, Ken Lee, decided to meet us at the Boston airport and travel with us. Together we rented a car and drove to the funeral service, which was held at the church that the Goguen family attended.

The church was filled with people, and it appeared to be mostly young friends of Arwen. Several classmates related emotional stories about how much they loved Arwen and would miss her involvement in their lives. I was saddened by these stories but what struck me the most was watching Arwen’s mother listen to all of these emotional stories. Suisei seemed to be in a trance with the life sucked out of her. We felt so sad for both Suisei and Art. As sad as this service was, it was even sadder when we went back to their home after the church service.

While Suisei did her best to see that everyone was comfortable, I sat and talked with Art. He explained that his job kept him away from home several weeks each month and although he missed his family while he was away, it was a necessary part of his job. He had arranged to be home this particular week because his son, Beren, was graduating from high school and many of his relatives were going to be in town for the ceremony. Art chose to stay at home for a bit longer in order to celebrate Arwen’s fifteenth birthday with the family.

Arwen had been living with diabetes for many years and she was diligent to check her blood-sugar levels often and give herself the required insulin shots. On that day in May, the alarm clock went off in Arwen’s room and when they went into her bedroom to see why she wasn’t shutting it off, Arwen was found unconscious on the floor. While they waited for an ambulance to arrive, Art, trained in CPR, worked to revive his daughter for over thirty minutes but it was too late. It’s assumed that Arwen awoke in the middle of the night and got out of bed to check her blood-sugar level but was unable to administer her medication.

Although Art told me this heartbreaking story in graphic detail, he managed to keep his composure. He must have been a wreck inside. What could be worse than losing your child? I learned how fragile life really could be.

Next Chapter: Adam is offered a great opportunity and the story of the Christian rock-band, “Oxygen.”

Part One Hundred & Forty Two

As our son, Adam, was finishing his first year of college at The Boston Conservatory, he received an offer from Phil Doreau, his best friend from high school. Phil’s family had acquired a nice home behind one of the famous mansions in Newport, Rhode Island and Phil arranged it so that he and Adam could live there, rent-free, for the summer! The home was a few hundred yards from the beach and there were plenty of seasonal jobs available in the area so it seemed like an almost perfect setting for Adam. Adam would work full-time and save a substantial amount of money to help with his college expenses for his second year. We were all pleased with this arrangement and knew Adam and Phil would have a lot of fun together.

In the meantime, Mal, Cassy, and I were still living in New Hampshire. One day as I was at Cassy’s school, my nephew Jesse DeMund caught up with me and asked if I’d be interested in hearing the “demo” CD that he had just finished making with the other members of the band he was in. We sat in my car and I was pleasantly surprised to hear this high-quality music. The vocals were clear and not drowned out by the music (as is the case in most unprofessional bands) and the songs were very well written. This was an entertaining CD.

The band was called, “Oxygen.” Jesse played the drums, Paul Howard played guitar, Chris Friedrich played the bass, Bryan Parys played guitar, an older guy named Mark played guitar, Brendon Waldron was a singer, keyboard player and handled the soundboard, Brian Waldron was the lead vocalist and occasional keyboardist, and Brian’s wife Sherri sang backup vocals. All of these young people were talented and together they sounded quite professional. Most of their songs were co-written by Bryan Parys and Brian Waldron. All of the band members were Christians and they chose to create and play Christian rock music.

The first time I heard the band perform was at a large Catholic church in Concord, New Hampshire. A group of us went to support the band members that we knew and we all enjoyed their performance. It was a bizarre experience to sit through a regular Catholic Mass that periodically had fun, rock music throughout the service. Shortly after this performance, the band members decided that Mark, the guitarist, was just not “fitting in” with the rest of the band. The band members felt he was too much older and he was interested in a different style of music so they asked him to quit the band.

“Oxygen” played several concerts at local places but the band wasn’t earning much money for all of their effort. Occasionally they’d get fifty dollars or so, but they didn’t seem to mind. They just loved playing their music. But now that they had a “demo” recorded, they had a shot at bigger and better things. They could use this demo CD to let potential “clients” hear their music. It could have led to some new possibilities for the band.

The band members had some things in common but they were different in many other ways. Paul, Chris, Bryan and Jesse were good friends and they were all attended the same high school. Brendon and Brian Waldron were brothers. Brian was married with a child and he had a full-time job that he needed to have to support his family. Although Brian enjoyed being the lead singer in the band and he had hopes of being discovered by a major record company, he didn’t seem to be very interested in the business side of the music industry. Some of the other band members were already “dreaming” of stardom; even fantasizing of performing in concerts all around the country and traveling in a deluxe tour bus. These dreams seemed premature to me because the band appeared to be neglecting some basic business principles. For example, the band resisted copyrighting all of their original songs. Several of the band member’s parents urged them to put a little bit of effort into protecting their valuable songs but for some reason the band members just didn’t bother. It just wasn’t a priority for them.

Mal, Cassy and I (and many of the other parents) traveled to most of the “Oxygen” concerts, including several concerts that were quite a long distance away from where we lived in New Hampshire. At one such concert, the band members were excited because they were promised that there would be a very large crowd waiting to hear them perform. It was an all-day neighborhood festival in Nashua, New Hampshire. The band members met down there but they hadn’t gotten clear directions from the festival organizers. Mal and I ended up driving around the city just hoping to find some sort of advertising poster or notice about the festival but we didn’t find any. Eventually we ran into someone who thought that they had heard about this event and they gave us some vague directions into the neighborhood they thought the event was in. As it turned out, the festival was in a tough section of the city and we were just about the only people who were not Hispanic. By the time we arrived, the band members had been talked into using their own sound equipment for the festival organizers. Brendon was the “resident techie” and he was always good at it but it seemed like the poorly organized festival organizers were really taking advantage of his good nature. The band was supposed to perform their concert set but now they were “tricked” into working the whole day. In the middle of the day, the “guest of honor,” Tito Puente Junior, arrived in a limousine. The “Oxygen” members laughed at Tito’s arrogant attitude. He thought he was “hot stuff.”

When the time came for “Oxygen” to perform, there were only a handful of people waiting to hear them. The large crowd they had been promised just never showed up. While this didn’t negatively affect their performance, I know they were disappointed. To make matters worse, Brian hadn’t bothered to ask if they were going to be paid for their performance. Apparently the festival organizers didn’t plan on paying the band for any of their work or for the use of all of the band’s sound equipment. Reluctantly, the festival organizers compensated the band by giving them fifty pounds of beef ribs. To their credit, the band members accepted the beef and learned to laugh about the experience.

I had some spare time at this point in my life and I offered to help the band in any way I could. I believed in their talent and their devotion to the message of the music and I knew I could do a better job for them on the business end. The band members all agreed to let me help them, especially because I didn’t want to get paid for any of this work. I was doing it, primarily, just to help my nephew, Jesse. I suggested to my brother-in-law, Greg, (Jesse’s father) that we should put up the money for the band to produce a CD so they’d have a product to sell at their concerts. Greg was certainly willing to get involved in this way. The band seemed very excited about this project. They rented recording studio time late in the evenings because the rent was cheaper and within a short time they had a master recording of their music. I found a CD pressing company in Worcester, Massachusetts who offered us a decent price for the manufacturing and packaging of the CD.

Brian had arranged for the band to perform at a huge, multi-day music festival in New Hampshire called “The Inside Out Soul Festival.” The festival featured many of the country’s top Christian performers on the “Main Stage” and over ten thousand people were expected to attend. “Oxygen” would only get to perform on one of the smaller stages on the outskirts of the property but this was still an exciting opportunity to be heard by many people. The only problem was that it was looking doubtful that the CD would be ready in time for this big event. After much begging and pleading, the manufacturing company promised that the CD’s would be ready on the day of the big concert. One of the band members would have to drive the two and a half hours down to Worcester to pick them up so that they’d be available to sell at the concert. Brian was at the festival with his family and he didn’t want to leave to pick up the CD’s because he was having fun. Besides, no one seemed sure that the CD’s would absolutely be ready. He didn’t want to waste a trip. Greg and I were frustrated that the band didn’t seem to understand how important it could be to have the CD available for sale while the band was performing. They could potentially sell a hundred CD’s! Eventually they realized how important it would be to have the CD’s so Brian and Bryan drove down to the factory. When they arrived, they were told that it could be another few hours before the product was ready so they decided not to wait. They wanted to have fun at the festival. So the concert went on with no product to sell to the crowd of enthusiastic and interested fans.

After their “set” was over, I convinced my nephew, Jesse, to go for a ride to Worcester to pick up the CD’s. They were ready for us when we arrived and we loaded over one thousand CD’s into my car. We had a fun ride back to the festival, listening to the finished product. The boys had done a great job on the music and the packaging was pretty good.

When we arrived back at the festival I learned that the band would have another opportunity to perform on one of the smaller stages so they’d have a chance to push their debut CD. We encouraged Brian, as the lead-singer, to promote the CD throughout their performance but he was uncomfortable hyping his own product. He mentioned it a couple of times but not very enthusiastically. Despite his reluctance, the band still sold a dozen or so CD’s to the small crowd that had gathered to hear them perform.

A few days after the festival the band had a meeting and we handed out a bunch of CD’s to each band member and asked each of them to do their best to sell them to their friends and relatives so that Greg and I could recoup our investment. Over the next month, Bryan Parys sold several and his mother, Barbara, sold quite a lot. Paul Howard and Chris Friedrich sold a decent amount but Jesse DeMund sold the most. Brendon Waldron sold a few but Brian Waldron only sold one or two.

I arranged for the local newspaper to do a big story about the band and a friend of mine with a local talk-radio show invited the band to do an on-air interview. I had convinced the local record store to carry the “Oxygen” CD and made sure that the record store was mentioned in the newspaper and on the radio. I contacted the youth pastor (an old friend) of the church in Bolton, Massachusetts and offered to bring the band down to perform a concert in the church for just a few hundred dollars because I had already arranged for them to perform the next day at the huge “Bolton Fair” that draws about fifty-thousand people each year. The Bolton Fair committee agreed to pay the band $650 and allow them to sell their CD’s to the crowd.

The church concert was amazing! About one hundred kids packed the front of the church and rocked to the music. The band was hot and the crowd responded and we even had some “crowd-surfing” happening! Sales of their CD’s were great and the band ended up making over one thousand dollars for that night. The next day, the concert at the Bolton Fair wasn’t very crowded. The fair attendees seemed more interested in the amusement rides and animal exhibits but we still had a small, enthusiastic crowd and sold some more CD’s. Overall, this was a well-received and profitable two days for the band. We were all happy to be done with the days of being paid in beef ribs.

A few months later I contacted another friend who was responsible for organizing a large church’s New Years Eve gathering. I suggested that they hire “Oxygen” to perform as part of the youth gathering. She agreed to pay them one thousand dollars for a one hour concert. I called Brian Waldron to tell him about the offer and he told me that he had already made plans to attend a local “First-Night” celebration with his family. I explained that the concert was planned to be in the very early evening and that he would most likely be home by 9:00 PM so he could still celebrate the New Year’s Eve holiday with his family. He refused to change his plans and he wouldn’t even mention it to the other band members. Later, when the other band members found out, they were pretty upset. This could have been their biggest “gig” to date and now the opportunity was gone.

The band got together for a business meeting to deal with some important issues and it became clear that Brian thought he was the band’s leader. The other guys thought that every member should have an equal say in the direction the band was going, including what concerts they’d like to book. Brian was very firmly convinced that this was his band and the other members were just employees. This was the beginning of the end of “Oxygen.” It wasn’t long after that meeting that the other band members moved on to other things and most of them have been quite successful. Bryan Parys is a gifted guitarist in a Massachusetts band. Chris Friedrich has been touring the United States with an innovative “jazz-rock-fusion” band that was recently signed with a major record company. Jesse DeMund is the worship leader at his church. Brendon Waldron is married. Brian Waldron is currently working in a hair salon.

Copies of the “Oxygen” debut CD are still available. If you’re interested, email me and I’ll sell you one for $5.00 plus $1.59 for postage. All of the proceeds will be donated to a charity that is near-and-dear to me. It is really a fun CD!

Next chapter: I try to buy a nice birthday gift for Mal.

Part One Hundred & Forty Three

We had been living in our new home in Gilford, New Hampshire for almost five months and I kept noticing that almost every time a guest commented on how much they liked our new home, Mal would tell them about the house that she really wanted. I loved our house because it was brand-new and was in perfect condition. Mal thought that it had no “character.” (By “no character,” I think she meant that it had no creaking floors or crooked walls)

The house Mal really wanted was located in Laconia, New Hampshire and was a reproduction of a 1700’s antique farmhouse. This home had five bedrooms, multiple fireplaces, and the barn was actually a garage. I also liked this house but there were several reasons why I thought we shouldn’t buy it. For one thing, it was built in a condominium community of primarily smaller homes and the monthly condo fees seemed expensive to me. I also thought that if we bought it, we would have a difficult time re-selling it when our time in New Hampshire was over because this home, being new, wouldn’t appeal to the true antique home enthusiasts and new home owners are more interested in houses with large family rooms and large kitchens. The majority of potential homebuyers also wanted large bathrooms with huge bathtubs. This home had none of these features. It also did not have a basement because one of the owners was afraid of basements so they decided not to build one in this house! It was very unusual for a home in New England not to have a basement. The sellers were also asking too much money for this home even though it was beautiful. When we first saw the house it was priced around $439,000 and it was way out of our price-range. It had also been for sale for almost a year.

Mal’s birthday was coming up and I thought that I would consider purchasing this other house for her. I know it sounds crazy, but I knew she’d really love that other house. I also felt confident that I could sell the home we had just recently bought and I’d probably make a small profit on it. I called a real estate agent and I found that the owners had dropped the price twice since we had originally seen the property. It was still out of my price-range but I knew the owners were very eager to sell it because of health issues. Mal and I went back to see the house and she loved it even more the second time. I noticed a few small things that I’d need to get repaired and some areas that would need some painting but overall it was quite nice. I’d have to think about this whole idea a bit more because I didn’t think we could comfortably afford such an expensive home, especially with our agreement to pay for half of Adam’s college expenses at The Boston Conservatory. With tuition and room and board around $30,000 each year, money could be very tight for us. Mal and I discussed this for the next couple of weeks until we decided we should really see the house again before we make any final decision.

Our real estate agent called the owners to schedule an appointment for us to inspect the property again. When we arrived, the owner explained that they had received a very low offer but they were seriously considering it because they urgently needed to sell the house. We told them that we really wanted to buy their house but we couldn’t afford to pay as much as they were asking. We offered them $310,000 and they accepted our offer. We were quite excited! The next morning we got a phone call from our real estate agent explaining that the other people who had made a lower offer on the house had believed that their offer had already been verbally accepted by the sellers and they threatened to sue them if they sold the house to us, even though our offer was higher. The owners were afraid and decided to give in to the threat and sold the house to the other couple. We were very disappointed but we didn’t want to cause any more stress for the elderly couple. We learned to enjoy the home we already had.

Next chapter: Cassy has a schoolmate who needs a place to live.
Part One Hundred & Forty Four

This chapter was originally going to be about the friend of Cassy’s who came to live with us for a while, but I realized that it happened after the events in the story that I’ll be telling now.

Our son, Adam, was spending the summer in beautiful Newport, Rhode Island with Phil, his best friend from high school. They were living in a nice, fully equipped small home behind one of the famous Newport mansions, just a short walk away from the ocean. It was Adam’s intention to work full-time to save up some money to pay for his second year of college at The Boston Conservatory but he knew he’d have lots of time to enjoy this three-month arrangement.

Adam was a very independent nineteen-year old and although he did like to have fun, we assumed that he’d make smart decisions, especially because he would be living with Phil. But, as it turned out, Phil had several family trips planned so Adam was basically living by himself for quite a bit of the time. Adam enjoyed being with people, so he explored the area in an attempt to connect with people his own age. Adam would call us about once every two weeks, mostly because we pressured him to call. He’d fill us in on his activities, his hunt for employment, and he’d tell us about his newly made friends from Rhode Island. It was his new friends that worried us.

Mal, Cassy and I spent a weekend in Newport so that we could visit Adam since we hadn’t really gotten to spend much time with him since he went off to college in 1998. Cassy went to spend the night at Adam’s place. The next day we decided to take Adam out to lunch so we met him at a park where he was hanging out with some of his new friends.

These young people (nicknamed “Park Rats”) spent most of their waking hours hanging out in a seaside park in Newport. Most of these kids were in their late teens. They were tattooed, pierced, and dressed in a punk-style. Some of them used various illegal drugs, (Ecstasy was the most abused drug) while most of these kids smoked cigarettes and illegally consumed alcohol. These were not the kind of kids we wanted Adam to be spending time with but I was surprised to hear all of the nice things they had to say about my son. It was clear that they loved him. This was comforting to us but we were still concerned about the influence that these kids could have on Adam. Adam was a confident “leader” as a youngster and wasn’t easily swayed by peer pressure. We hoped this would continue to be one of Adam’s strengths.

Adam got a full-time job working as a reservations clerk for a local hotel. He didn’t like the job because he was stuck in an office with no personal contact with other people but he knew he needed the money for college. He told us, quite frequently, when he’d call us, how much he hated this job.

Late one night, at about midnight, Adam called us. He told us that he and his long-time girlfriend, Meridith, had just broken up. Although he assured me that the decision was mutual, I didn’t believe him. From our conversation, and the lateness of the phone call, I could tell that the break-up was not his idea. I knew he loved her. We had no good advice for him so we just listened while he tried to express his thoughts about this situation. Eventually it became clear that Meridith was unhappy with the way Adam was currently living and spending so much time with the “park rats.” She told Adam that he needed to grow up before they could get back together. Adam tried to convince us, (and himself) that this break-up was a good thing.

As the weeks went by, Adam seemed to believe that everything was under control and he’d tell us about some of the positive things going on in the lives of his new friends. He’d call to tell us how excited he was that he convinced one of his friends to stop using heroin and that he got him to join a drug abuse program. He told us about how he convinced another kid that a “life of crime” was not a good thing. While we were glad that Adam was helping these kids, we really just wanted him to come home because we were nervous about the influence this group could have on him. Adam insisted that this is where he needed to be. He was now an adult and he could legally make these kinds of decisions on his own. Besides, the summer would be ending soon and he’d be going back to college.

Next chapter: In the meantime, Cassy has a school friend who needs a place to live.

Part One Hundred & Forty Five

In June of 1999, our daughter Cassy explained to us that one of her friends needed a place to live. Amy, (not her real name) was one year ahead of Cassy in school but they had been in the school musical of “Annie” together, and had both been on the cheerleading squad. Amy’s parents lived in another state and for two years Amy lived with the school principal and his wife while she attended Laconia Christian School. Amy wanted to change her “living arrangement” and she asked Cassy to see if she could live with us for the next school year. I wasn’t too interested in having someone else around the house but Amy was determined to continue her education at Laconia Christian School and we all decided to give it a try.

I had occasions to observe Amy in both the school musical and the cheerleading squad and I knew that she tended to be stubborn and sometimes she would refuse to give her best effort to the tasks assigned to her. Amy was a very intelligent and articulate girl with a lot of potential but she just didn’t seem happy. She claimed that she didn’t trust men but she was usually fussing about her appearance in order to attract their attention. She was a complex girl. We didn’t really need the chaos and drama that living with another teenager could be. Mal and I knew that if this new living arrangement was going to work we’d need to establish some “ground rules” and needed to meet with Amy’s parents before we’d commit to allowing her to live with us.

Since we didn’t know them, we were very surprised that Amy’s parents didn’t bother to call us before they would allow their daughter to come and live with us. Perhaps they just assumed that our home would be a safe family environment for Amy; but, still, we expected them to call to learn a little about us. When no call came from them, we contacted them and met at our home one day before the new school year began to discuss any potential problems. We explained that Amy would be expected to maintain better than average grades in school, pick up after herself, and she would need to stay busy after school by participating in a sport or at a job. We didn’t want her just hanging around at our house while Cassy was very busy after school in sports and drama. Babysitting for a sixteen-year old wasn’t part of our plan. The people she had been living with warned us that Amy tended to make a mess wherever she kept her makeup. This was a concern because our house was brand-new and had lots of white carpeting. We insisted that all of her makeup be kept in the bathroom that she’d share with our daughter. Amy and her parents agreed that these were all good ideas.

Shortly after the school year began, it became apparent that Amy wasn’t going to participate in any “after-school” activities so we drove her around to apply for jobs at various retail stores and she was hired at “Fashion Bug.” Since Amy didn’t know how to drive, this commitment to work a part-time job would require Mal or me to drive her there and pick her up when her shift was done. Amy didn’t keep this job very long though. She had difficulty remembering her work schedule. Her “cloudy” memory caused another problem.

Amy was taking a couple of prescription medicines (one was Ritalin) that were intended to help with her with her ADHD. Well…she was supposed to take these. The problem was that she usually forgot to take them. Mal casually asked, “Amy…have you been taking your meds?” Amy got upset that her medication was mentioned in front of another student and she demanded to be allowed to take care of herself. We suggested that she keep the drugs in her bathroom so she’d be able to take them as part of her daily “getting ready for school” schedule. After she had been with us for a month or so, we noticed that she had only taken a few of her pills. We also noticed that Amy seemed to be more “clear-headed” when she was not taking the Ritalin. We called her parents to suggest that they talk with Amy’s doctor to see if the drugs were really necessary. Amy’s father was reluctant to even try this because he was convinced that Amy couldn’t function without these drugs but after Amy urged him to talk to the doctor, he agreed to get the doctor’s professional opinion.

A conference call was arranged and it was determined that Amy would cease using the medications for a trial period. Her behavior and moods would be closely monitored.

I am personally opposed to most of the prescription drugs that the medical community is pushing. I rarely even take an aspirin. I also have mixed thoughts about the misdiagnosis of attention-deficit-disorders. Although I’m sure that some children actually have this disorder, I’m also sure that many who are diagnosed do not. In Amy’s case, after being off of Ritalin for a few weeks, she began to be very clear-headed. She walked around the house smiling and whistling “show tunes!” She initiated intelligent conversations during our rides to and from school and during mealtimes. We had high hopes that this arrangement would work out for all concerned but it didn’t take too long to realize that things were falling apart.

Amy ended up breaking most of the “rules” that we had all agreed on. Her grades fell far below average, she left makeup in her bedroom resulting in several stains on the carpeting, and rarely picked up after herself. But worst of all, she tried to convince our daughter that it was a waste of effort for Cassy to try to get good grades in school. Cassy was a “straight A” student and she was motivated to do her best, so when it became clear that Amy was going to be a bad influence on Cassy, we made the difficult decision to end this arrangement. Amy would need to find another place to live.

Another family agreed to take Amy. Sadly, even though there was no indication that she needed it, Amy’s father insisted that she get back on the medications. A few years later Amy’s life spun out of control. She began using illegal drugs, got pregnant, ended up living on the street in another state and wound up in a mental hospital.

Unfortunately, there is no happy ending for this chapter.

Next chapter: My old friend, Michael Warshaw, includes us in another publication he works for!

Part One Hundred & Forty Six

I received a phone call from Michael Warshaw, one of my old friends, and he was asking if I’d be willing to be interviewed for an article that was going to be published in the national magazine “Inc.The Magazine For Growing Companies.” Michael was a senior editor of this slickly produced magazine and a staff writer was writing an article about the difficulty that small businesses were encountering with the ever-changing Internet world. The writer wanted a short quote from me to include in her article. I was happy to be a part of a national publication because it would be good exposure for my two comic book and collectible stores.

Anne Marie Borrego (the writer from Inc. Magazine) called me to get the quote she wanted for her article. As we talked, she seemed inclined to include my business as a major part of her story. After our half-hour conversation she decided to make us the central business profiled in this story! She arranged to meet at our Worcester location with Ken Carson, the manager of my stores, and myself. She brought a very professional photographer who took what seemed like two hundred photos of the store and Ken and I. While I enjoyed the interview process, Ken seemed nervous. Although I’m pretty good at “hyping” my business, Ken did a better job of conveying our business philosophy. Here is the article that was published in the May, 2000 issue of Inc. Magazine (the entire content of this article is copyrighted by Inc. Magazine):

“How I Learned To Stop Worrying and (almost) Love eBay.”

It’s not just you. Everyone has a hard time adjusting to change--even a superhero. Consider Peter Parker. Other than being an orphan, he lived a pretty typical life for a New York teenager. Raised by his aunt and uncle, he attended Midtown High School and was your above-average tech geek. But one afternoon at a science exhibit, an irradiated spider bit him. Well, life changed faster than you could say “click-through.” Suddenly he possessed extraordinary powers. Parker immediately saw the opportunity in all this. He figured he would make millions as a television star. So he donned a colorful costume and called himself Spider-Man. But that very night, a guard called to Spider-Man to help catch a burglar fleeing past the stage. Parker didn’t see why he should have to do the guard’s job and let the man run free.

Days later, Parker’s beloved uncle was murdered by that very same burglar. Parker was racked with grief and guilt. Faced with the trauma of change, he had blown it. He vowed to fight crime and never again lose sight of what was really important.

It seems only fitting that Spider-Man’s image hangs above the door of Paul Howley’s flagship store, in Worcester, Mass. Howley has collected comic books and trading cards since he was a kid. When he was eighteen, he made it his living, selling his treasures at trade shows and conventions. Now, at age 45, he runs a company called That’s Entertainment, employing twelve people in two stores. (His second store is in Fitchburg, Mass.) He has enjoyed such success that he doesn’t even go to work most days.

In 1997, Howley started hearing about a new Web site called eBay. At first he dismissed the virtual auction house as a passing fad for “quirky collectors.” But he couldn’t resist checking it out. On a lark he searched for a THRUSH rifle, a mid 1960s toy version of the weapon of choice for the villains in the television series “The Man From Uncle.” That particular gun was Howley’s personal “Holy Grail” of collectibles, and he found it on-screen in an on-line auction-- in the original box! Despite his twenty years in the collectibles business, Howley had never seen one of those guns in its box.

He bid a solid $2000 for the toy rifle. With eleven minutes to go, it looked as if it were his! But then, tragically, he was outbid at the very last moment--“sniped,” as eBay regulars call it. Out of the blue, some anonymous bidder had scooped up the gun for $2700.

Howley was crushed. There, within his grasp, was a prize he had searched for his whole adult life. He had never even spied one in its original box at any of the hundreds of shows and stores he had passed through. But just two minutes on this electronic flea market and there it was-where anyone, anywhere could find it. It was at that moment that Howley became very, very afraid. How could his little specialty stores compete with a giant, wonderfully stocked rival like that--one that was everywhere a laptop could be, virtually in the air around him?

Of course, Howley’s business had suffered setbacks before, such as the slump that followed the 1992 publication of the comic book series “The Death Of Superman.” That was the year That’s Entertainment pulled in record-sales. But the entire comics industry was poised to take a dive. In 1993, Howley’s revenues plunged more than 25%. They fell another 10% in 1994. Howley eventually bounced back, thanks largely to a decision to diversify his inventory.

Now his unassuming store on Worcester’s Park Avenue has the usual floor-to-ceiling shelves with a huge variety of comic books: X-Men, Pokemon, Batman, Jay and Silent Bob. But there’s also a sprawling section offering sports memorabilia, a hugely important addition to the store’s product mix. You name it, Howley’s got it, and chances are it’s signed by Ted Williams.

In the mid 1990s, Howley began propping up his business with a profitable selection of photographs, game balls, jerseys, trading cards, bats, and hockey sticks—many of which are autographed by idols like Drew Bledsoe, Nolan Ryan, and Scottie Pippen. Still, despite the success of that effort, That’s Entertainment just couldn’t get back to the kind of numbers it had had when Superman died.

So that’s where Howley was when he first encountered the power of eBay. When he was fighting for that THRUSH gun, he was up against collectors from everywhere—Asia, South America, and just down the street in Boston. The same was true for any item he could think of, from out-of-print laser disc movies to old Archie comic books. Why would collectors bother with a store when they could find anything they wanted on the Net?

It wasn’t that he couldn’t keep selling stuff. The question was, Where would he get it? “I didn’t see eBay as a threat sales-wise,” Howley remembers. “But it is so easy to use, why would somebody sell their collectibles to a dealer that would pay roughly 50% of the value when they could get 100% on-line?” Howley had always depended on his ability to buy entire collections, like the 30,000 comics That’s Entertainment recently bought from one fan to bolster its selection of vintage funny books. Suddenly, any customer could instead sell his or her treasures on eBay, and probably for a better price. Howley’s stores and all others like them were becoming obsolete.

But Howley, like Spider-Man, experienced an epiphany after that initial shock.

Just as Peter Parker discovered that his new superpowers could be harnessed to prevent tragedies like the murder of his uncle, Paul Howley realized he could use the newfound power of eBay for good. He saw an opportunity wrapped inside the on-line threat, one that he could exploit. As an option, it sure beat closing up shop on the spot.

So Howley set up a new computer on a landing in the back of his Worcester store. He even dedicated one employee to the full-time job of eBay auctioneer.

The eBay connection turned out to be a gold mine for That’s Entertainment, a whole new source of revenues. Even better, the explosive growth of eBay did little to erode the stores’ traditional base. The majority of Howley’s suppliers continued to come in to sell and trade their wares, so the revenue boost from eBay represented real growth.

For starters, That’s Entertainment could move items that didn’t have any particular regional appeal. It’s easy to sell Ted Williams stuff in the shadow of Boston. Moving a Stan Musial bat is another story. In Red Sox country, fans of the old-time St. Louis Cardinals great are rare. For months a bat autographed by Stan The Man sat in the Worcester store, its $150 price tag attracting no buyers. So in February, Howley’s staff decided to auction it off on eBay. A fan in San Diego outbid all rivals and got it for $175. “There was some pretty intense bidding,” recalls Ken Carson, manager of That’s Entertainment’s Worcester store. “And the great thing is, we would have never had that connection with that guy.” Not to mention the 16% boost in price, thanks to the auction process.

The beauty of eBay is its power as an outlet for some of the more obscure items that walk in the door. Last year a regular customer brought in a giant stage prop of a cat’s head from a concert by the 1970s glam-rock phenomenon “Kiss.” The seller offered it to the store for $250, but Carson wasn’t confident it would sell for the 60% markup needed to justify the purchase. After some bargaining, he and the seller made a deal: That’s Entertainment would auction the prop through its eBay account and take a 40% commission.

Next chapter: The conclusion of the Inc. Magazine article.

Part One Hundred & Forty Seven

“Conclusion of the article about our stores in Inc. Magazine.” The entire content of the original article from Inc.Magazine is copyrighted by Inc.Magazine.

Inc.Magazine writer, Anne Marie Borrego, wrote:

Last year a regular customer brought in a giant stage prop of a cat’s head from a concert by the 1970s glam-rock phenomenon “Kiss.” The seller offered it to the store for $250, but Carson wasn’t confident it would sell for the 60% markup needed to justify the purchase. After some bargaining, he and the seller made a deal: That’s Entertainment would auction the prop through its eBay account and take a 40% commission.

There appeared to be little interest when the auction first went up on eBay, but as the week progressed, Kiss fans emerged in droves. And in the last ten seconds, the bidders were in a frenzy, sending the price from $800 to $1500. That’s Entertainment made $600 from the sale, at least $450 more than it would have made if it had sold the cat’s head in the Worcester store.

In 1999, Howley’s first full year of selling on eBay, That’s Entertainment averaged $4000 in on-line revenues a week. The company is now an official eBay “PowerSeller,” with more than 1000 transactions to its credit. The company’s sales have now hit a new record.

There are, of course, the obvious growing pains that come with a new revenue model. Take inventory, for one. With new auctions going on-line daily, That’s Entertainment has to stock more merchandise, much of one-of-a-kind items of all different sizes. That’s being handled now with an inelegant mish-mash of adjustable shelves in the back of the Worcester store. At first, a running list was used to keep track of everything. Now the store has a searchable database, but Carson says he finds it confusing and a bit cumbersome.

And then there’s the matter of shipping. It took a big bite from the $600 profit on that giant Kiss cat’s head to custom-pack the thing and ship it halfway across the country. Carson, for one, says he’ll think twice before putting another large, delicate item up for auction. He wasn’t looking forward to going through the same process last winter with a new arrival, a life-size figure of Anakin Skywalker. You don’t move a heavy thing like that by trusting the Force. So when Skywalker came in, Carson decided to put it out in the store to see if he could sell it to a walk-in customer—and in March he did.

But there’s an even darker side to That’s Entertainment’s success on eBay. Despite all the benefits of Web auctions, Howley and Carson worry that they could be selling the business’s soul to an on-line devil. Every item sold on eBay is removed from the hands of the customers they see every week, the ones who count on them to find great new stuff. “Our business is not a business that’s based on people’s just buying things for their own enjoyment,” Howley explains. “This is almost an obsession for some.”

The tenor of his collectibles stores is different from that of, say, your average retail-clothing store. “People don’t come in to buy comic books or toys and just leave. They talk about it with each other. It reinforces that they’re interested in an exciting hobby,” Howley says.

That’s also a huge part of the joy of working in the collectibles industry—the opportunity to hang out with customers who also love baseball cards, Green Lantern comic books, or vintage Atari video games. It’s those excited hobbyists that Carson worries he could alienate should the business go all the way on eBay.

Earlier this year Carson stumbled upon a box of Sunday funny papers from the 1930s and 1940s, including some old Flash Gordon comic strips. He eventually listed one of them on eBay, and it sold for $20 to a collector in Ohio. “But afterwards I realized that a customer here probably would have really liked to have had the chance to buy them,” Carson said. “So now I’ll run them by that customer first.” Carson plans to price the comics from $9 to $15 in the store—less than they could fetch on-line. “But we might get more value selling them to our store customers than we would by putting them on eBay,” he says.

That’s Entertainment has spent 20 years nurturing what is arguably its most valuable collection—its loyal customers, many of whom are friends who return week after week. Every Wednesday, when the new comics are released, a handful of employees unpack the boxes of comics and distribute reserved copies to the individual mailboxes of some 600 subscribers, customers who signed up for the free service. That’s presold merchandise. And while other comic book collectors may come in occasionally, most of those loyal readers show up every week to pick up their subscriptions, chat with fellow collectors, and take a gander at the rest of the merchandise. For Carson, those customers are the heart and soul of the business—not the anonymous bidders at the other end of a broadband connection.

And when you check out the numbers, he’s right. Unlike the band of repeat customers in the stores, on-line buyers rarely return to buy That’s Entertainment’s offerings. In fact, more than 90% of the company’s eBay customers are onetime buyers. “People search for the item, not the auctioneer,” Carson says.

The irony is that something about doing business on eBay, the celebrated paragon of on-line community building, violates the spirit of the community of collectors who gather in the brick, beam, and cement-floor store in Worcester. And it’s in face-to-face encounters that Howley and Carson find so much satisfaction. “Our store is like a party,” Howley says. “One of our favorite customers got married to somebody he met at the store, and they’ve been married for seven years.”

That’s just one of the reasons that Carson can’t figure out just what to do with eBay. At the end of 1999 the store’s original eBay full-timer left. That has given Carson time to reflect on just what this bold new on-line world will mean for the company’s future. What he knows for sure is that he wants to maintain the vitality and viability of the That’s Entertainment stores. “We’re trying to remain a destination,” he says, “a place where people still say things like ‘I came in today because I knew you’d be here.’”

Howley and Carson can honestly say they’ve faced the power of eBay, harnessed it, and survived—for now. That’s Entertainment will be around for its customers, both real world and virtual, for the next few years at least. Yet so much has changed, and it’s happened so quickly. Who knows how easy it will be to keep having fun in such a fast-changing world? That’s a question even Spider-Man can’t answer.

Well…that’s the end of our big-time national article in Inc. Magazine. We certainly appreciated that our friend Michael included us in this magazine! Things have changed quite a bit since this article was originally written. Although our involvement with eBay has decreased, our in-store business has increased, mostly due to the hard work and long-range planning of our quality employees.

We initially thought that most collectors would begin to sell their collectibles directly on eBay instead of selling them to us, but the collectors now realize that selling on eBay is not as easy as they thought it would be and there are significant costs associated with selling on-line. Serious collectors continue to enjoy the simplicity of selling their collections to us because we are eager and able to buy their entire collection and pay a respectable price for it!

Part One Hundred & Forty Eight
My wife, Mal, and I were getting more involved at the school that my daughter was attending for her sophomore year of high school. Mal was organizing and running the snack bar at almost all of the school’s sporting events as a fundraising event for Cassy’s senior class trip. I was enjoying my involvement with the school board even through some difficult times.

After our very successful (and profitable) performances of “Annie” last year, Brenda (the director) and I were asked if we could do more than one play for this school year. Since Brenda was very talented as a director, it was decided that she could do another play with just the high school students. I would attempt to direct a play with just the middle school students. Brenda chose “Oklahoma” and I chose “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown.” Brenda was lucky to secure the talents of Barry and Margaret Armitage to handle all of the musical aspects of “Oklahoma.” These two dedicated people worked very hard to teach the kids all of the songs. For my play, I’d need to find someone else to perform the music. They would have to learn to play all of the material and be available every day to teach the songs to the kids. Trust me; it’s not easy to find someone who is willing to take on such a big responsibility. This left me with the difficult job of finding another pianist to play the music for “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown.”

Around the time we began our pre-production work on these two plays, we got a phone call from the owner of the home in Newport, Rhode Island where Adam had been staying over the summer. She expressed her concern for Adam’s health and well being. She was concerned because Adam seemed to have lost his motivation to be productive and he just wanted to spend his time hanging out with the large group of kids known as “the park rats.” These were the troubled kids with lots of body piercings, tattoos, unusual clothes, and oddly colored hair. These things by themselves are not necessarily a bad thing, but there was a lot of drinking and drugs in this group of underage kids and that worried our friend. It worried Mal and me too, but we thought Adam was smart enough to avoid these things.

We had no way to contact Adam because he didn’t have a cell phone and he was no longer staying in our friend’s home, so we decided to drive down to Rhode Island to find him. The three-hour drive to Newport seemed to take “forever” because we were very worried and had no idea what to expect when (or if) we found Adam. We drove around the area and eventually decided to stop and ask a store owner if they knew of a park where kids hung out. They directed us to a small seaside park but when we got there it was deserted. We weren’t convinced that this was even the “right” park because we had the impression that the large group of “Park Rats” usually stayed in the park until very late almost every night. It would be unusual for the park to be empty. After driving around for a while longer, we decided to get a hotel room for the night and resume our search in the morning.

We didn’t sleep well that night but getting back to our search early in the morning didn’t make much sense since Adam and his friends rarely got up early. When we drove up to the park around mid-morning we were relieved to see Adam there with several of his new friends, several of whom told us how much they loved Adam. To be honest, I didn’t care. I wanted Adam out of there and away from these bad influences.

We took Adam out for lunch and we told him about some of our concerns. He did his best to convince us that although he knew he was doing some things that were not very smart, he felt that he needed to remain here with his new friends. He had no interest in returning to The Boston Conservatory to begin his sophomore year of college. He didn’t want the stress of the increased debt of $30,000 per year and he wasn’t convinced that the education he was getting was worth the price.

After lunch, we drove him to the place he had been staying in Newport. We had no idea that he had been sleeping on the couch of a family who lived in “the projects” of Newport. We didn’t even know that Newport had “projects!” This wealthy city did indeed have low-income government housing and it was just as run-down and disgusting as the government housing in most major cities. Adam told us that there were frequent gunshots heard during the nights and there was drug dealing and violence on an ongoing basis. This convinced us that he needed to come back home to New Hampshire to live with us until he could decide what to do with his life. After much pleading, he agreed to come home for a three-week trial period. You see, once he had tasted the independence of living at college and had experienced basically living on the streets of Newport, he wasn’t excited about the idea of being “controlled” by his parents. We promised to try to work things out while he stayed with us so it would be tolerable for all of us. We left Adam there that day but returned a week later, as arranged, to bring him back to New Hampshire.

Cassy’s friend, “Amy,” was still living with us at that time in our extra bedroom upstairs. Adam set up a bedroom area in the finished basement so he could have his own space and this arrangement worked out just fine.

Next chapter: Adam needs our help.

Part One Hundred & Forty Nine

While Adam was living in Newport, Rhode Island, he quit the job he had and, with no money to live on, applied for a credit card.The credit card company gave him a card with a $600 limit and he soon reached—and exceeded---that limit, getting himself rather deeply in debt.
I was determined to help Adam learn to budget his money and to get out of debt as quickly as possible. A friend from our church hired Adam to work at his company as a data-entry clerk. Adam hated this boring job but he knew that this job was necessary; at least for a short time. When he got his first paycheck, we cashed it and divided up the money into several marked envelopes. One envelope was designated for his credit card payment, one for car insurance, one for his smaller student loan, one for his large student loan, and one to begin to pay us back for the money we loaned him to pay his monthly student loans while he was without a job. Whatever was left was for Adam’s personal use. With this simple system, we planned to have Adam out of his credit card debt in as little as three months. It was also a good budgeting experience for him.

After a few weeks, Adam missed his Rhode Island friends and he decided to drive the three-hour trip to spend the weekend there. He would leave after he got out of work on Friday afternoon and he’d return home very late on Sunday night. He was usually exhausted when it came time to go to work on Monday morning after one of those weekends.

In order to renew his registration, Adam’s car, a beat-up Chevy Celebrity, needed a safety inspection. The service station manager called us after it was inspected to let us know that there was no way for him to “pass” this vehicle. He showed us that the metal frame was rotted which made it too dangerous to drive anymore. Adam contacted a junk car dealer who offered $100 for the car if we could drive it down to his business location. Sadly, Adam’s first car was turned into scrap-metal. Until other arrangements could be made, we planned to let Adam use our ten-year old mini-van while Mal and I would share my ten-year old Honda Accord. Our daughter, Cassy, was beginning to drive and it didn’t seem like she needed a car of her own right away. I actually enjoyed driving her to school each day. Since the school was only twelve miles from our home it was an easy trip.
As gasoline prices started rising, it became obvious that the mini-van was too expensive for Adam to drive on his frequent trips to Rhode Island. He couldn’t afford to buy a decent, reliable car from a dealer, so we worked out a deal for him to buy my Honda Accord and he’d make payments to me when he could.
After a month or so of Mal, Cassy, and I sharing one car, we realized it was time to start looking for another car. I went out one afternoon and bought a new Toyota Camry. Mal teased me that it was a boring, middle-aged man’s car. I bought it because it was comfortable and reliable so I guess she was right. Soon, it was going to be time to buy a new car for Mal and she didn’t want a “boring” car. She had driven her very boring mini-van for over ten years and it was time for something more fun.

We still owned the run-down apartment building in Worcester, Massachusetts and it had been for sale for over a year. I was losing about $1500 each month on it because the tenant in the commercial part of the property just refused to pay her rent. I could have evicted her but I had no other tenant willing to rent the location so I just didn’t bother. I got a call with an offer to buy the property for $65,000 and, though I had paid $185,000 for it, I realized that it was time to sell. It had proved not to be a good investment for me. Even though this was a large loss, it was a happy day for me when it was finally sold!
Once we were no longer losing money each month on the apartment building, we began our search for Mal’s new “fun” car. We test-drove several convertibles including the Mercedes Kompressor, a Chrysler Sebring, and the BMW Z3. The Mercedes was just too expensive and the Chrysler Sebring was a Chrysler (looks nice but it’s junk) so we were leaning towards the BMW Z3. Our daughter, Cassy, thought it would be inconsiderate of us to buy a car with only two seats because then she couldn’t go anywhere with us in it.

While watching television one night, Mal caught a 15-second commercial for the newly redesigned Mitsubishi Eclipse Spyder convertible. The car flew by onscreen and Mal said, “That’s the car!” There was a Mitsubishi dealership in Laconia, New Hampshire so we drove there the next day, only to find out that these cars were in very short supply. They only had a red one on the lot and Mal and I wanted a silver-colored car. The salesman did a computer search and located the car we wanted at a dealership in Virginia. He arranged to have the car shipped up to his location but we would have to pay full sticker price! This was the first time in my life that I had ever paid full-price for a car and it made me feel stupid, but it was exactly the car we were looking for…a nice looking, four-seat convertible sports car. Driving this car was fun because it handled great and was quite powerful. This model was so new that we’d rarely go out for a drive without someone commenting on how nice the car looked. (Now that this model has been around for several years, it’s not so special.)
Our schedules worked out much better now that we each had a vehicle to use. This happened at a good time because things began to get hectic. Overall though, life was good!

Next chapter: We have a busy season!

Part 130 - 139

2009-12-07T08:51:00.001-08:00

Part One Hundred & Thirty

“We make a “crazy” decision.”

My son, Adam, was preparing for his high school graduation from Lexington Christian Academy and he still wasn’t sure which college he was going to attend in the fall. He had been offered a decent academic scholarship for the University of Cincinnati but he had not yet been accepted into the musical theatre program. He would need to audition for the theatre department and his confidence had been shaken because of a few unsuccessful recent college auditions. This university was recognized as one of the top schools in the country for theatre and Adam was seriously considering going there even if he didn’t make it into the theatre department. He figured that once he was there, he could keep trying until he got into this exclusive department. He was also offered a generous theatre scholarship to attend Eastern Nazarene College in Massachusetts, based on his credentials as a good student and actor as well as a good recommendation from his high school drama teacher, Chris Greicco. Adam wanted a change and really didn’t want to go to a private Christian college, so he declined the offer. He also didn’t want to be separated from his girlfriend, Meridith, who had already been accepted at The Boston Conservatory in Boston, Massachusetts. With a last-minute audition and a recommendation from Adam’s private voice teacher (who was also a teacher at The Boston Conservatory) Adam was accepted into this highly acclaimed school. When we asked Adam how much the tuition was, he admitted that he had no idea. It never occurred to him that it might be more than we could afford. Our agreement with both of our children was that we would pay for half of their college expenses and the other half would be their responsibility. Any scholarships that they earned would be deducted from their half of the cost of the tuition. This seemed fair to us because any scholarships would be the result of their own hard work. Unfortunately, since Adam had waited so long to apply to The Boston Conservatory, there were no scholarships offered to him. He was just to consider himself lucky to be accepted.

My sister Sharon’s daughter, Emily, was graduating from a small, private Christian school in Laconia, New Hampshire a week or two before Adam’s graduation and we were invited to attend the graduation ceremony.

Emily was supposed to be born a few weeks before Adam but since Adam was born seven weeks prematurely, he was born first. Emily and Adam ended up in a good-natured “competition” during their youth. Who would walk first? Who would talk first? Who would start school first? Who would get their drivers license first? Now, Emily was graduating high school first.

We noticed some unusual things as we listened to the speakers at the graduation ceremony. The “special guest speaker,” Bill Broughton, was a teacher from the school and although he was a quiet, soft-spoken man, his message was an encouragement to all of the students and the audience. The principal of the school, Dave Borchers, (also known as Mr.
B.) introduced each of the twenty graduates to the audience. He shared some of his personal thoughts about each student and then listed some of each student’s accomplishments and aspirations for the future. My wife and I were surprised that this principal seemed to really care about these students and personally knew so much about them. The other thing we noticed was something that didn’t impress us. It seemed as if most of these students had rather unspectacular life-goals. One girl hoped to become a secretary. One boy hoped to work in his family’s excavation business. Some expressed interest in some form of missionary work. Several students were planning to go on to college after graduation but none were accepted into prominent “Ivy League” colleges. Those that were going to go to college had chosen small private Christian universities or state schools. I wasn’t very impressed.

The next week we went to Adam’s graduation from Lexington Christian Academy. The ceremony was a formal affair with all of the “pomp and circumstance” you’d expect from a serious college preparatory school with the outstanding reputation of Lexington Christian Academy. Many of the teachers and administration proudly wore their robes adorned with sashes indicating their educational credentials. The list of colleges and universities that Adam’s classmates were going to attend included Harvard, Yale, Princeton and other top schools. Very impressive indeed.
This school had certainly prepared these graduates for the next part of the educational process. If I’m not mistaken, every student in the graduating class was attending a four-year college the following fall. That is quite an accomplishment for both the school and the students. But after experiencing Emily’s graduation ceremony and comparing it to Adam’s ceremony, we couldn’t help but notice a significant difference. At the time, it was hard to put my finger on exactly what the difference was, but I knew that I wanted my daughter, Cassy, to be a part of the small school in New Hampshire instead of the school that Adam had attended. Cassy had been put on a “waiting list” at Lexington Christian Academy but we weren’t comfortable waiting any longer for a spot to open up for her. We needed to make a decision. Only half seriously, I made a crazy suggestion.

In the unlikely event that a spot did open up for Cassy at Lexington Christian Academy, we’d be paying about $10,000 per year for tuition. We loved my sister Sharon and her whole family and we’d enjoy being closer to where they lived. When Adam went off to college in Boston, the rest of us could move to the Laconia, New Hampshire area so that Cassy could attend Laconia Christian School. The tuition was so low (about $2800 per year) that we could rent an apartment or condo and pay the tuition for less money than just the tuition for Lexington Christian Academy. I was rarely needed at my comic book stores because I had a good staff of competent employees. We could keep our home in Bolton, Massachusetts, just in case this situation didn’t work out. If it didn’t work out, we could just move back to Massachusetts.

After discussing this for a few days it started to seem like a real possibility. We called the school in New Hampshire and the school secretary, Judy Downing, arranged for us to come up for a mandatory student and parent information night and interview. After a brief interview we were asked to prayerfully consider whether this was the right move for us. Convinced that it was, we called a few days later and were told that Cassy would be allowed to attend this school. This meant that we needed to deal with a lot of major issues before the summer ended, like finding and renting a place to live in New Hampshire. But first, we were leaving on our huge family cruise soon!

Next chapter: The cruise.

Part One Hundred & Thirty One

While Mal and I were on a Caribbean cruise in 1997 we thought it could be nice to celebrate our upcoming 25th wedding anniversary by taking a cruise with all of our siblings, their spouses, and our parents. We had a nice wedding all those years ago but it wasn’t very expensive or “fancy” because we had no money at the time. Now we had a little bit and we wanted to share this milestone anniversary with the people we loved. We had negotiated a reasonable price with Carnival Cruise Lines for fifteen cabins on the outside of the ship because we wanted all of our family to enjoy a window view. The location of these cabins weren’t the greatest since Mal and I were paying for this trip and we were trying to make this trip affordable. Even in the “less desirable” location this vacation was going to cost us over $30,000.

A few weeks before we were scheduled to set sail, our travel agent, Elsa, called to say that Carnival had upgraded all fifteen cabins to suites with private balconies on the top deck at no additional charge! No explanation was given for this great upgrade but we were happy to take it.

The ship, “The Imagination,” was “sailing” out of Miami, Florida and since we were coming from several different parts of the United States we all planned to meet on the ship near the main pool. Travel arrangements were the responsibility of each of our family members because we couldn’t really afford to pay for their airfare, too. Several family members used accumulated “frequent flyer miles” and another group just drove to Miami because they lived nearby. A bunch of us flew out of Boston, Massachusetts together since that was the most convenient airport for us. Surprising, even though there were thirty-one in our group, we all found each other soon after we boarded the huge cruise ship.

After the mandatory “lifeboat muster” drill, we all spent some time exploring this luxurious “floating hotel.” This ship was twelve-stories high and it was almost 1000 feet long. It contained several nightclubs and lounges, two huge dining rooms, a large casino, a health club, swimming pools and much more! This ship carried over two thousand passengers and almost one thousand crewmembers. My wife and children had no problem finding their way around this ship since we had taken numerous cruises on similar ships but many of our relatives found themselves intimidated by the enormous size of “The Imagination.”

After the ship headed out to sea and our initial exploration was done, it was time for dinner in the main dining room. Since our group was so big, we were seated at three large tables next to the windows looking out over the ocean. We decided to change our seating arrangements several times during the seven-day voyage so that we’d get to spend time with as many of our relatives as possible. As usual, the food was delicious and beautiful to look at. Most of our group enjoyed the opportunity to sample foods that they had never tried before including snails, cold strawberry soup, and several Caribbean dishes.

This cruise offered lots of activities onboard while the ship was at sea and there were dozens of tours available for the days that we were scheduled to be the islands. With such a large group I knew that it could be much too difficult to be their designated “tour guide,” so we decided to be available to offer suggestions without putting pressure on them to do what my immediate family was planning to do. Each evening, I’d explain several tour options and I’d tell them what I was going to do. Anyone who wanted to travel with us was welcome. If they wanted to do what I was doing, they needed to meet in the lobby at a specified time. No pressure at all. This was their vacation and they should do whatever they wanted to do.

Our first island stop was in Cozumel, Mexico. Most of us took taxis to the beautiful Chankanaub Park where we snorkeled in crystal-clear, fish-filled water, explored a small botanical garden, and relaxed in the sun.

Our next island stop was Ocho Rios, Jamaica where I chartered a private bus to take us to the famous “Dunn’s River Falls.” This is a huge series of waterfalls that you walk and climb, (holding each other’s hands) through rushing water with the help of an experienced tour guide. Although there were a few very challenging parts of this climb, we all managed to survive and we had a fun time. The family members who had decided not to go with us to “The Falls,” went snorkeling and reported that it was even better than Cozumel.

Our last island stop was in Grand Cayman where most of us went on a tour of “Sting Ray City.” This tour takes you to a sandbar about twenty minutes out into the ocean. When you get into the water you are suddenly surrounded by dozens of stingrays that measure as much as four feet wide. These strange, gentle creatures would glide under your feet and brush up against you as you swim around this sandbar. The tour guides gave us pieces of squid to hold between our fingers so the stingrays could suck it out of hands. This was an exciting tour, and although I’d done this once before, it was fun to watch our relatives experience this.

One night, before dinner, a group of us went to a lounge for a Karaoke session and we were entertained by several of our own family members including Lori Howley, Madeline Paladino, Carol Walsingham, and our son Adam and daughter Cassy.

Another night, my daughter Cassy, and Mal’s sister Carol, participated in the “Passenger Talent Show” in front of almost one thousand people. Cassy sang the theme from Walt Disney’s “The Little Mermaid.” Carol sang a song by Ray Boltz titled, “The Anchor Holds,” that explained that during times of crisis and trial, the power and strength of God will remain constant if we rely on Him. This was an interesting choice of songs to perform for a “cruise-crowd” but she certainly did a great job.

On another evening, while the ship was at sea, our relatives surprised Mal and I by reserving a function room and throwing us a twenty-fifth anniversary party complete with many thoughtful gifts. It was great to have almost our entire families together in one place. (The only relative who wasn’t invited on the cruise was my brother Jay and his wife, Annette. Although we love them, we knew that they couldn’t afford to spend any money on shipboard or island activities and they wouldn’t enjoy the “cruise-atmosphere.” We didn’t want them to feel uncomfortable) As it turned out, this would be the last time we’d all be together.

Part One Hundred & Thirty Two

During the summer of 1998, my family got ready for some really big changes. Adam worked full-time to save money for his college expenses.
He was heading off to The Boston Conservatory in the fall and he would need enough money to enjoy himself for his first semester. We had an agreement that we’d pay for half of his tuition and room and board (we’d pay a higher percentage if he got good grades) but he would be responsible for his own “fun” money. If he wanted money for pizza and other entertainment, he’d need to save during the summer while he was working because the Conservatory warned us that, as a theatre major, he’d have no time available to work during the school year. His schedule was going to be very intense and loaded with both “core” academic classes and acting, dance, and voice lessons. His school day could go from early in the morning until late into the evening. He was going to a very busy guy.

In addition to working his full-time job, Adam had decided to continue his involvement in local community theatre by co-directing “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown.” This would involve lots of days when he’d have to go directly from his job to the play practice but this was made more enjoyable for him since his girlfriend, Meridith, had the lead role of Lucy.

Our daughter, Cassy, had graduated from eighth grade at The Imago School and she was now accepted to Laconia Christian School in Laconia, New Hampshire for the fall semester for high school. Cassy got the lead role of “Kim” in a local community theatre production of “Bye, Bye, Birdie,” so she was going to be very busy all summer.

This summer was also going to be a busy time for Mal and me. We needed to make all of the arrangements to move from our home in Bolton, Massachusetts to Laconia, New Hampshire. We had decided to keep our house in Massachusetts, just in case the situation in New Hampshire didn’t work out so we spent some time looking for a place to rent near my sister Sharon and her family since we enjoyed their company. We had a few decent options and chose a condo rental which was down the street from Sharon and a reasonable fifteen-minute drive away from the high school. This was a fully furnished, two-bedroom, two bath, unit on the second floor of a former apartment building that had been turned into condominiums. The monthly rent was $650 so even with the full school tuition and rent combined we were still paying much less than just the tuition cost at “Lexington Christian Academy” in Massachusetts. Mal and I were eager to begin this new adventure in New Hampshire but Cassy really wanted to stay in Massachusetts with her friends, especially her best friend, Bethany Tobia.

Cassy and Bethany were the kind of friends who shared all of their innermost secrets with each other. When they were together, which was most of the time, they were usually laughing or giggling. In fact, in August, as an eighth grade graduation gift, we treated Cassy and Bethany to a cruise to Bermuda and they laughed (and flirted with boys) through the whole week. Both of these girls were trustworthy, responsible and very well behaved. Cassy was an especially good girl. The only exception was one time that is now known as “The Great Burrito Licking Affair.”

One winter, while Cassy was attending the Imago School for eighth grade, a few of the “mature and responsible” older students were asked to help prepare some Mexican food for the whole school during a week-long event known as “Winter Carnival.” Cassy and her classmate, Marta, were two of the students asked to help. While they were preparing the burritos Cassy thought it would be “funny” if she actually licked each burrito! Cassy and Marta were laughing at the thought of watching their schoolmates eat the burritos after the shells had been licked.
Cassy really thought it was hysterically funny. She assumed it would be safe because the burritos were going to be cooked after she licked them so she thought that no one would get sick. The girls made two mistakes though. First of all, they shouldn’t have done it in the first place, and second, they shouldn’t have told other kids about it. One of the students, Pete McNamara, thought it was very funny too, but he told his mother and she didn’t get the humor. She reported it to the school principal who then felt obligated to take disciplinary action against Cassy and Marta. The two girls were suspended from school for a short time and they weren’t allowed to participate in the very popular “Winter Carnival” events. This was the only actual “trouble” that Cassy got into during her time at the Imago School.

Although Cassy was reluctant and sad to leave her friends from Massachusetts, she realized she had no choice. The public high school was not an acceptable option for her and there was no opening at the private school that Adam had attended. Mal and I were convinced that New Hampshire is where we all needed to be. Besides, it was a new adventure!

Next chapter: The move.

Part One Hundred & Thirty Three

In the late summer of 1998, my wife Mal and my daughter Cassy moved up to the rented condo in Laconia, New Hampshire to get ready for Cassy’s freshman year of school at Laconia Christian School. Adam and I stayed at our home in Bolton, Massachusetts, as he needed to work full-time right up until the beginning of his first day of college so he’d have enough spending money for his first semester. While Adam worked, I went to work at my comic book store in Worcester, Massachusetts to finalize my plans to end my involvement in day-to-day activities of the business. I’d be living about 110 miles away but would be available by telephone to help Chris deal with some problems if he needed me.

My staff seemed able to handle the responsibilities pretty well and I was comfortable that Chris, my company manager, would be a good motivator and leader. Business was great and sales were still rising.

Our move to New Hampshire was pretty easy because the condo we were renting was fully furnished. All we needed to move up there was our clothes and a few personal effects. We settled in quickly.

A few weeks before Cassy’s school year began, we got a call from the Massachusetts high school that had put Cassy on the “waiting list” for admission informing us that a spot had opened up for her. It was too late for us to change our decision so we declined. We were confident that we were making the right decision.

Shortly before the New Hampshire school classes started, the school organized a family “work day.” It was expected that the entire family of the school’s students would volunteer some time to help maintain the school property and buildings. This was our first real involvement with the school and Cassy and I met and worked with Steve and Dan Forbes. Dan was a classmate of Cassy’s so it was nice for her to get to know him before school actually started. Although Cassy’s cousins, Jesse and Jacob, attended the school too, they were not in the same grade. Cassy was a “new kid” at this school and that can be awkward for a young teenager. Luckily, there were a few other “new kids” coming to the school for the first time including Nichole Behan, Seamus O’Brien, and Andrew Hare. We had met some other local families when we had gone to church services held in the gymnasium of the school including the Verhoeks and the Foote families. The Verhoeks had a daughter, Emily who was several years ahead of Cassy and the Foote family had Bryan, who was several years ahead of Cassy, and Caleb, who was in Cassy’s class.
Before I actually met Caleb, I had heard that he was a serious comic book fan and his favorite was Spider-Man. I found out that he was missing one part of a multi-part storyline and on one of my trips to my comic book store, I was able to get a copy for him. I got directions to his home and put it into his mailbox. When we finally met after church, we discussed comic books for quite a while. I found Caleb actually knew much more about the current series of Spider-Man than I did!

We became friends with the Foote family pretty quickly. Barbara Foote (the Mom) had lost her husband Al to cancer and found herself alone with three young children: Allison, Bryan, and Caleb Parys. In time, she married Jim Foote, a kind and patient man who helped raise Barb’s children as his own, with love and understanding.

Within a very short time, Cassy began dating Bryan even though he was two years older. Technically, we didn’t want Cassy to actually go on a date until she was sixteen so although we liked Bryan quite a lot, we were still “freaked out” when he gave her a diamond ring after only knowing her for a few months! He insisted that it was just a “friendship” ring so both families allowed it.

Next chapter: We invite one of my childhood favorite artists to our
store: Gene Colan, a true master of comic book art!

Part One Hundred & Thirty Four

I began reading comic books when I was about five years old. I enjoyed the fantastic adventure stories and the colorful artwork, although I really couldn’t tell the difference between most artists’ styles. The artists working at the “Big Two” publishers in the 1950’s and early 1960’s had talent but were not very distinctive to my young eyes. In fact, I wasn’t really aware that “real” people drew the comic books until I bought a copy of DC Comics “Flash Annual” #1 from 1963. There was a feature in this issue titled, “How I Draw The Flash” by Carmine Infantino that actually explained how he drew the character. From that moment on, I paid more attention to the artists. After a while, it became pretty easy to determine which artist drew the stories even though many comic books failed to “credit” them. Dynamic artists and artists with their “own” style of illustrating were few and far between but some did make an impression on me as a young reader and collector. Jack Kirby (The Fantastic Four), Steve Ditko (The Amazing Spider-Man), and Carmine Infantino (The Flash), were some of my favorites. Kirby was dynamic. Ditko was strange. Infantino was sleek. But there was one artist whose work was so different that it really impressed me. He was the only artist who could draw “movement.” He experimented with oddly shaped panels with characters swinging in and out of sight. He blurred the image and used heavy shadowing to convince the reader that this was a super-hero of action. This artist was dynamic, strange, and sleek, all in one package. This was Gene Colan!

Gene Colan had been working as a comic book artist for many years before I became aware of him. He was under contract with another company when he began to do some work at Marvel Comics in the 1960’s under the pseudonym of “Adam Austin.” I can’t believe that this false name really helped because his style is so distinctive. After a few months, he began to use his real name. Within a few years, Gene Colan had illustrated Iron Man, Doctor Strange, Submariner, and Daredevil. Many comic book fans consider Gene’s version of these popular characters to be the best versions. In the 1990’s he was considered to be one of the top artists of the “silver-age” of comics. So, imagine my excitement when Gene Colan agreed to be a guest at my comic book store in Worcester, Massachusetts!

We had hosted many artists, writers, and celebrities at our stores over the years but the biggest thrill for me was to host people whose work I loved. We had my childhood favorite, Davy Jones of The Monkees back in 1993, and now we were having one of my favorite comic book artists! This happened because of the hard work and dedication of Ken Carson, one of our part-time employees. Here, Ken relates how this appearance came about:

“I saw that Gene was soliciting commission drawings in the national trade journal for the comic book business, “The Comics Buyers Guide.” There was only a fax number listed, so I decided to contact him about making an appearance, and quickly typed something up without much expectation of success. But just a few minutes after the invitation went out, a return fax came in, accepting. I remember you being shocked when I came down from the office to tell you Gene and his wife Adrienne were coming to the store, because it came completely out of the blue.

Two days a week at That’s Entertainment was my schedule at the time, but I worked from home on the event. It meant a lot of contact with the Colans in the weeks leading up to the big day.

From our press release, “The Worcester Phoenix” (a local newspaper) set up a nice interview. We asked Kevin Hall, a huge Daredevil fan and a long-time customer, if he’d do a special interview with Gene, just for our website.

When I called one day to firm up details, Gene asked me if I thought anyone would come to see him; he had appeared at a store in New Hampshire or Vermont and just a few people attended. I assured him our clientele would turn out to meet him, and that we would promote it right. We had already received inquiries from fans from New York and Canada about the appearance.

Before the event, Adrienne mentioned that she was working on an idea to raffle Gene’s remaining original art, and that was when I mentioned Internet auctions. I also offered to try to sell some of his original art on our website.

Then, the day before the event, Adrienne called to say Gene was having a vision problem. They wouldn’t stay in Worcester the night before as planned, but would come straight from a Boston hospital to the store. She told me not to worry, that everything would work out.

The day of the event, there was of course, a huge crowd lined up, and the Colans arrived as promised. Gene immediately started doing sketches for people—really beautiful, detailed drawings—and while this was underway I found a few minutes to introduce Adrienne to the Internet. Seeing eBay, as well as some comic art sites, quickly convinced her that Web would be the way to go.

Afterwards, it became clear to me that they really needed someone with the time and experience to work up a website—someone completely trustworthy—so I put Adrienne back in touch with Kevin Hall. Soon, www.genecolan.com was up and running. Through that, Gene found out that the world was full of admirers who recognized his talent and appreciated the care he always put into his work. Adrienne told me years later that she and Gene thought it was strange that such a big turning point in his career should follow from a random event—our invitation. I told her it wasn’t completely random, because the reason I contacted him was that he had made a connection to me years ago through his art. Even as a kid, I could see he was putting more into it than most artists. Through that small contact, the success of the event, the adoration he then tapped into through the website, Gene had actually made it happen through the quality of his work.”

Over the years, Gene Colan has made two more appearances at our store and each time he was an outstanding, courteous and gracious guest, thrilling his fans with stories of the comic book business and impressing us all with his dedication to his craft. He is truly one of the “Masters” of comic book art.

Next chapter: We suggest a drama program at Cassy’s school.

Part One Hundred & Thirty Five

My wife, Mal, and I, brought Adam to college at The Boston Conservatory. We filled our minivan with a large portion of his possessions and helped him set up his dorm room that he shared with three other guys. The college was in the heart of Boston, and although I wouldn’t enjoy living there, Adam loved it. After spending most of his life in a very rural town in Massachusetts, he was excited about the many possibilities in a large city. Surprisingly, I wasn’t upset about Adam going away to college. I knew he could probably take care of himself and we had a close enough relationship that he knew he could come to us if he needed anything. Our only request was that he was to call us, collect if he needed to, at least once a week.

Our daughter, Cassy, was now involved in her freshman year at Laconia Christian School in Laconia, New Hampshire. She missed her friends from Massachusetts and she didn’t enjoy living in our small rented condo. She spent hours crying and almost begging us to let her go back to Massachusetts. We explained to her that we truly believed that this was where we were “meant to be.” We encouraged her to appreciate all that this new school had to offer, including a good after-school sports program for girls that featured volleyball, basketball and cheerleading.
Cassy had wanted to be a cheerleader since she was a very young girl and now she had the chance to do it. We all needed to make the best out of this new time in our lives.

We knew Cassy was sad that this school didn’t offer any Drama program, so Mal and I discussed the possibility of volunteering to start such a program. I felt confident that I could direct a school play and I knew that Mal and my sister Sharon could design the costumes. How difficult could this really be?

I met with the principal, Mr. Borchers, and explained that I felt there was a need for a drama program at the school. The school offered several sports programs but there were limited opportunities for students interested in “The Arts.” He told me that it had been tried before and that although the plays were good, not too many students seemed interested enough to continue doing plays. Usually there would only be a handful of girls interested and that made it too difficult to produce quality performances. I knew I had learned quite a bit about producing a play by watching my kids as they participated in plays throughout grade school and their community theatre involvement. I suggested that we produce the play “Annie” because it was a steady “crowd-pleaser” and since Cassy had been in it before, I could count on her help. I urged him to let me try it my way and assured him that I’d keep him informed of things as they developed. By the end of our conversation, I had convinced him to let me try it. Mr. Borchers gave me a phone number of another parent who had also volunteered her time if the school ever decided to produce a play. I called her and this was my first experience with Brenda Carney. Looking back, even though we had help from many parents, we couldn’t have done this play without her!

Next chapter: The audition process.

Part One Hundred & Thirty Six

Although Cassy would have preferred to be back in Massachusetts with all of her childhood friends, she agreed to make the best of the situation at the small private school in Laconia, New Hampshire. Cassy joined the girl’s volleyball team during the fall semester of her freshman year of high school. She had come from a school that offered no sports at all so she lacked the experience that most of the other players had. Also, since she was quite small (less than four feet ten inches) she was at a disadvantage. Still, she gave it her all. She attended every practice session and worked hard. Luckily, the girl’s volleyball coach, Laurie Haines, was willing to let every girl play in the actual volleyball games. This established a positive “work-reward” attitude for the players. Cassy knew she was being treated fairly.

Cassy found the course work at this new school to be pretty easy, especially coming from the very strict and serious education at The Imago School. She realized that she had been fully prepared for high school academics. She worked hard enough to get straight “A’s” in all of her classes.

Mal and I were willing, and eager, to volunteer our time at this school. We met with Cassy’s whole class to discuss possibilities for their big senior class trip. Many were surprised that we would want to discuss a trip that was four years away, (a lifetime away for teenagers) but we knew that, historically, students would usually wait until the last minute to decide on a class trip and there wouldn’t be enough time to raise whatever money was needed for it. Camping was always an inexpensive option, but after talking with the class, it was evident that they wanted something different. We suggested taking a Caribbean Cruise and the kids seemed to be excited about the possibility of this so we agreed to help them plan this trip, since we had been on dozens of cruises in the past. This seemed to be a group of fun-loving, well-behaved kids, who were willing to work hard to reach any goal set before them, and Mal and I were willing to help them.

I met with Brenda Carney, the other volunteer who offered her time to put on a play. We discussed the “positives” about producing “Annie.” There were lots of characters so we could allow anyone interested to actually be in the play. The play was “clean” and was acceptable subject matter for a conservative school’s involvement. It was also a play that Cassy had been in a few years before and she had played the title character of “Annie,” so I knew she’d be comfortable doing it again. We wouldn’t have to worry about the lead character and that would take some of the possible stress off of us as first-time directors. I don’t remember if we held auditions for the role of “Annie” but I do know that Cassy was right for this role for several reasons, one of course, was her small size.

The auditions for all of the other roles surprised us. We announced, through the weekly school publication, “The Newsline,” that the play was open for any students grades five through twelve. Brenda and I publicized the upcoming auditions and we personally urged several students to try out for the play, including Brian and Peter Groleau, Andrew Hare, and (Cassy’s boyfriend at the time) the incredibly shy Bryan Parys. We had been told that the school didn’t have much success when they attempted to produce plays in the past because there just wasn’t much interest there, so we had no idea what to expect this time around. Brenda and I were really surprised when we had nearly 60 kids audition for the play for either character roles or stage-crew! Out of an eligible student population of about 130 kids, almost half of them were interested in being a part of this play!

The auditions were great and it seemed quite simple to assign the parts to the “right” kids. Although some students who wanted the lead roles may have been disappointed that they didn’t get chosen, Brenda and I based the decisions on a combination of abilities displayed during the audition process, and physical appearance. If the kids were really tall, but the part called for a short person, they wouldn’t get that part. We eventually found appropriate parts for every student who wanted an “on-stage” role. Several of the students were satisfied being “back-stage” as stagehands and stage crew.

The principal of the school, Mr. Borchers, located a place for us to perform the play, since we had no auditorium on the school property. The “Christ Life Center” was an old theater that had been converted into a church in the downtown area of Laconia. All of the original theater seats had been removed on the first floor, but the original balcony was intact. The stage was small and there were no real “stage wing” areas to store changes of scenery or waiting performers. It wasn’t exactly perfect, but since it could seat over five hundred people and it was offered to us at no charge, we would make it work.

Once we had secured the location, I needed to fill out the contract with the owners of the play indicating the location of the production, the number of seats, and the proposed ticket price. All of these factors affect the fees that eventually get paid to the owners of the play. The royalty fee could be as high as $1000 for this play. After talking with some of the school’s staff, I got the impression that it we shouldn’t expect more than a hundred people to come to this play. I was further discouraged when I was told that I shouldn’t expect that people would actually pay to see this. It just hadn’t been done this way before. I knew that the school didn’t have any “extra” to spend on a big drama production and the businessman part of me wanted to this to be a money-making event so I strongly urged the school to continue to let me try this my way.

Knowing a little bit about human nature, I planned to get the parents and relatives to commit far in advance to attend this play by selling the tickets on a “first-come-first-served basis.” If they wanted a good seat, they’d have to buy the tickets right away. If the tickets had been given away for free and something else had come up on the night of the performance, or if the ticket-holder arrived home from work too tired, they would just not show up. Even though the tickets were going to be sold at a “bargain” price of only two dollars for students and senior citizens, and four dollars for everyone else, I knew that once the tickets were purchased, the people would come because they’d feel that the money would be wasted if they didn’t go to see the show. For many months before the performance, I carried around a large envelope of tickets and a seating chart, encouraging and pressuring people to buy tickets while good seats were still available. Three weeks before the show, we were completely sold out! But in the meantime, it was up to Brenda and me to make this play work.

Next chapter: The play and the school board.

Part One Hundred & Thirty Seven

Producing a large-scale musical is a lot of work, but it’s so much easier when there are people willing to volunteer to help. At Laconia Christian School, where Cassy was going for high school, there were several people willing to give up so much to make this play possible for the students. We had a dedicated group of mothers who created all of the costumes including Sally Perrino, Anne Glines, Zee Murphy, Jeanne Sample, Mal Howley, and my sister Sharon. These women worked many hours sewing costumes and scouring local thrift-stores for inexpensive clothes to use. Jane Jepsen volunteered to choreograph the play. My daughter Cassy also helped with the choreography, improving on the choreography she had performed in “Annie” a few years earlier. Cassy’s voice teacher, Carol Gellart, agreed to come and help with some vocal coaching.

Putting on a musical play requires musicians, or at least a solo pianist. Since this was a small school, an orchestra was out of the question. I didn’t even know anyone willing to play the piano! I don’t remember who it was (although I think it was the principal of the school) but someone recommended that I contact Nancy Cross, a member of a local church and a good piano player. After we explained what we’d need from her, Nancy agreed to play the piano for our production. Nancy intended to learn all of the music at home so she’d be ready by the time the rehearsals required the music but she worked full-time and seemed to be overwhelmed. Unfortunately, I think she underestimated the enormous amount of time that this commitment would require!

My daughter, Cassy, was involved in JV Basketball and Varsity Cheerleading at the same time that we were beginning to rehearse the play but she seemed prepared because the “lines” just came right back to her since she had played the title role of “Annie” a few years previous.

Brenda Carney tackled the position of director with energy and eagerly tried to prepare the cast with exercises designed to loosen them up and free them from inhibitions and shyness. It was clear to me, almost from the beginning, that Brenda was far more qualified to direct this play than I was. My job ended up being more of the business end of producing this play. As it turned out, this was a good thing, because I could not have done it all by myself.

Another aspect of putting on a play is the set design and scenery building, and since I barely know which end of a hammer to hold, I was thrilled when two parents stepped forward to volunteer to take over this important part. Belinda Simpson and Lyndel Jackman worked with nineteen students “behind the scenes” to build the sets and gather the necessary props. They also recruited the assistance of Al Jepsen to help out with the sets that needed a talented carpenter’s expertise. Belinda and Lyndel convinced several local businesses to donate the materials that they needed for the sets so it wouldn’t deplete our meager budget.

While the play rehearsals were in full swing, a school board member who was coming to the end of his multi-year term approached me to see if I’d be interested in taking his seat on the board. I thought I might have some skills that I could offer in this capacity so I applied for the position. The school board members reviewed my completed application, interviewed me and, with the condition that I become involved in a local church, allowed me to be a board member.

The board was made up of several people I knew, including my sister Sharon, my friend Barbara Foote, Tyler Simpson and Karen Fogg. The chairman of the school board was Jim Morel, the pastor of the Laconia Christian Fellowship, the church that owned the property the school buildings occupied. Also present at the school board meetings were Roger Allen, a volunteer in charge of finances, and David Borchers, the school principal, but these men did not have “voting” privileges. We may not all have been the most “qualified” people but we certainly all took this responsibility very seriously. This school was very important to all of us.

To satisfy my requirement to be involved in a local church, my family began to attend the services of Laconia Christian Fellowship that were held in the school gymnasium. We had “sampled” several other local churches in the area and hadn’t found “just the right place” but since my sister Sharon and her family, and several of our newly made friends attended Laconia Christian Fellowship we decided that this would be our “home church.” Although it wasn’t exactly the kind of church I was accustomed to, we were all welcomed by many in the congregation.

Next chapter: We decide to make our move to New Hampshire a “permanent”
thing.

Part One Hundred & Thirty Eight

After living in a small condo for almost six months, (and not enjoying it) we decided to start looking for a house to buy. Unfortunately, we still owned our home in Bolton, Massachusetts and a lot of our money was tied up in it. We decided to try to sell it.

We contacted a few local Massachusetts real estate agents and decided on a local woman who was friendly and serious about selling our house. We agreed on a commission, negotiated a shorter term for the exclusive “right to sell” and signed the brokerage contracts. Within eleven days we had an offer that we accepted. The potential buyers were from California and they had an expensive home that they needed to sell in order to buy our house but our agent talked with their agent and was assured that the house in California would sell very quickly. We were pretty excited that our house “sold” so fast. Our agent stopped marketing our house because we were all confident that the deal was certain to go through as agreed. A few weeks went by and our buyers still hadn’t gotten any offers on their house in California, so they lowered their “asking price” on it. A few more weeks passed, still with no offers, so they lowered the price again. Eventually, after we took our house off the market for almost two months, the asking price of the buyer’s house in California had been reduced so far that they no longer would qualify to buy our house. We learned a valuable lesson from this experience and from then on, we would keep marketing our home even if we had a signed contract, just in case the sale fell through.

Within a few days after we relisted our house, we had another full-price offer. The young couple loved the house although it seemed to us that this was an expensive purchase for first-time homebuyers. They hired an inexpensive home inspection company that they found on the Internet to do the inspection. This inspector was unprofessional and lazy and turned in a report with vague comments about the roof, appliances and heating system, stating that these items were seventeen years old, without mentioning that they were all still in very good condition. This made the buyers nervous and they asked to be released from the purchase agreement. We allowed them to cancel the purchase and within a couple of weeks we had another full-price offer.

The next couple had come to look at the house a couple of times and really loved it enough to sign a contract to purchase it. On one of their visits, Mal and I were there while they were looking and we noticed that their four-year old daughter was out of control, running around the house, opening drawers, and paying no attention to her parents’ plea for her to calm down. The mother was a former Olympic-hopeful swimmer, and although both of the parents loved our swimming pool, they were concerned that their kid would fall into the pool while they weren’t looking. We explained that the door from the house had a deadbolt lock, and then the child would need to walk across our large deck, go down a set of stairs, walk across part of the lawn, and go down two sets of stairs before she would be near the pool. It would be very difficult for the daughter to get to the pool area without the parents being aware of it. Despite our efforts to convince them that the daughter would probably be safe, they asked if we would let them cancel their agreement to buy our house, and we let them.

Our real estate agent assured us that she’d keep trying until she got the house sold for us. The real estate market was very strong and there were more buyers than sellers so home prices would continue to escalate making our house an even more attractive investment for someone.

Mal and I found a real estate agent in New Hampshire to show us some houses in the Laconia, New Hampshire area. We looked at cheap ranch-style homes and small “capes” but Mal fell in love with a beautiful reproduction of a farmhouse from 1790. Mal loves antiques and old houses while I like brand-new homes that don’t need constant upkeep. This house had the best of both worlds for us. Since it was only about five years old, everything was in great condition but it looked like the actual antique home that it was copied from. The owners had tried, unsuccessfully, to sell it a year earlier, for a little over $500,000 but the market in this part of New Hampshire was a bit slow at that time so they had just lowered the price to $429,000. This was still too high for me. I believed that I would also have a tough time trying to sell this house if we decided to move somewhere else because buyers who love antique homes aren’t necessarily interested in reproductions and most other buyers are interested in homes with a more modern style with larger kitchens, white walls, and a Jacuzzi tub in the master bathroom. Mal reluctantly agreed and we continued our search for a new home.

Our real estate agent in Massachusetts, doing her best to sell our house, asked if she could paint our master bedroom. It was painted a vivid burgundy color that Mal and I liked but it could “turn-off” potential buyers. She painted it with two coats of white paint and the next couple that came to look at the house made us another full-price offer. We nervously waited for the required home inspection and septic system test to be completed. We had been through some emotional ups and downs with the three previous buyers and we were hoping for a mutually satisfying conclusion. Things looked good but we would have to wait for almost sixty days to “close” the deal. In the meantime, our New Hampshire agent took us to see a house in Gilford, New Hampshire.

This house had been custom-built for an executive at a nearby company and the night before he had planned to move in he was “laid off” from the company. Part of his negotiated lay-off package was that the company had to buy the new house from him, so when we were shown the house, it was owned by the company and they were eager to sell it. Mal wasn’t excited about this house but I knew the moment I walked in that I wanted to buy this house. It was a brand-new, two-story colonial style, four bedroom, three-bathroom home with a partially finished basement with more space than we really needed. I liked the clean, white walls, nice white carpeting, and the wood floors in the kitchen, dining room and foyer. Mal just thought the house was boring with no character. I knew it would be easy to resell when it came time to move.

The company was asking $329,000 for the house, but sensing some eagerness to sell on their part, I offered $282,300. (Feel free to ask me about how I came to such an uneven price.) They accepted our offer but they insisted that we had to “close” within two weeks. I didn’t have the cash to pay for this house so I needed to get a very quick loan. I went to Laconia Savings Bank, and although I had no account with them and had never done any business with them, I asked them for a loan of $211,000. I explained that I was self-employed and all of my tax records were in storage in Massachusetts, so I couldn’t provide confirmation of my income. I told the loan officer that we owned a home (with no mortgage) in Massachusetts that was under agreement and that within three months it should be sold. I also explained that I’d need the money within a week. Eleven days later, we were moving into our new home. It was pretty amazing that, in that day and age, a bank loan officer would be so accommodating.

I made several trips in our Dodge Caravan with boxes of our fragile and personal things to the new house and hired a friend of a friend in the moving business to bring two twenty-six foot trucks of our stuff from the house in Bolton Massachusetts to our new home in New Hampshire.

Shortly after we moved in, the deal on our house in Massachusetts was finally completed. We used part of the money to pay off our loan on the New Hampshire house so that we were “debt-free” again. The house that we raised our children in was now just a memory but I didn’t have any regrets about selling it. The most difficult thing was realizing that we would now be living so far away from the many friends that we had made during our time in Massachusetts. Even though we were only one hundred miles away, we knew we wouldn’t be able to get together with our old friends very much. I also wouldn’t be visiting my comic book and collectible stores very often anymore. I was confident that the manager knew what he was doing so I wasn’t too worried. That would soon change.

Next chapter: My company manager must go!

Part One Hundred & Thirty Nine

I had moved most of my family to New Hampshire and we were now settled into our new home. Adam was busy enjoying his first year at The Boston Conservatory and we usually only heard from him once every few weeks. He invited us to attend a play in which he was asked to perform titled, “Savage In Limbo.” It was an honor for him to be asked because it was primarily a play for the senior students and Adam was only a freshman. He warned us that the language was a little rough and he didn’t want us to be shocked. We weren’t shocked. Adam had primarily performed in comedies or musicals in the past and it was refreshing to see him in a serious drama. His performance was excellent and, when it was over, a professor from the college came over to us and praised Adam for his strong performance.

Since I was now living over one hundred miles away from my two collectible stores I needed to trust that all of my employees would continue to act in an efficient and professional manner. I trusted my manager, Chris, to oversee everything and to lead the staff by word and example. Chris had been with me for almost ten years and I had always been impressed by his dedication to the business and his interest in keeping our customers happy. I had big plans for Chris to eventually take over the company while I was away. I even had him written into my personal will. I was shocked when things began to unravel at the Worcester store. The potential problem in my delegating so much responsibility is clear. The situation that developed was not unique, but nonetheless extremely disappointing. Changes had to be made.

During this same time period, Mal and I (and many other volunteers) were very busy getting ready to put on the big musical of “Annie” at the school that Cassy attended in New Hampshire. Our show had completely sold out three weeks before the performance but the owner of “The Christ Life Center” allowed us to sell a few more tickets for the balcony area of their building. These tickets sold quickly too.

As usual, two weeks before the actual performance, the play seemed doomed to be awful! Some kids still refused to learn their lines, several songs still needed work, some sets were still not built, and our pianist had to work at her full-time job and she couldn’t always make it to the rehearsals. By March 26th, 1999, the first day of the real performance, everybody pulled it all together and put on a really great show! The audience loved it and commented on what a great uniting event this was for the school. Remember, almost half of the entire school participated in this production!

Not everyone at the school was happy though. A couple of teachers complained that the play took too much time out of the students schedules and that some of the kids complained that putting on a play was much more work than they anticipated. I explained that by comparison to the athletic program, which only includes ten to fifteen students for any one sport, the play was actually less of a commitment of time and energy. Basketball and volleyball players practiced every weekday for several hours and then traveled in busses for hours to play in the out of town games, all at a great cost to the overall school budget. This play actually made a profit, which went back into the general school budget. I also explained that if the students came to the play rehearsals with all of their lines and songs memorized, there wouldn’t be as many stressful moments. We also had a complaint from a parent about a scene in the play where several characters pretended to smoke cigars. I realized that we just couldn’t please everybody. Overall though, almost everybody enjoyed the play. When the second performance ended, even the students who complained that it was too much work asked what play we were going to do next year because they wanted to be involved again!

Once the play was over, it was obvious that I still needed to deal with the situation at my store. After a concerted effort to fix the situation, I parted ways with the manager on April 1, 1999.

Next chapter: Now what was I going to do?! I need a new manager!

Part 120 - 129

2009-12-07T08:50:00.001-08:00

Part One Hundred & Twenty

My son, Adam, went to a top-notch college preparatory high school in Lexington, Massachusetts. The school claimed that almost 100 percent of all of their students went on to college after graduation. A clearly defined schedule was implemented to put each student on a college-bound path beginning with his or her freshman year in high school. I like this approach because it prompts the students to plan in advance to achieve their goal of attending college. It teaches them to establish a goal and diligently work towards that goal. In many ways, we run our comic book and collectible stores that same way.

When Adam reached his senior year of high school he began the application process for college. Since he was interested in pursuing Musical Theatre, the process was much more complex. He needed to be accepted at a college academically but he also needed to audition to demonstrate his ability to act, dance and sing. This required him to actually go in person to each college he had interest in attending. Since we still had to get our daughter, Cassy, to school each day, and this process began while Mal was still operating her store (The Vineyard Stamp Company), it was decided that I’d go with Adam to these auditions and Mal would stay home to take care of normal obligations. I was grateful that I had a staff of dedicated employees to take care of my comic book and collectible stores while I was away.

Adam decided to apply to “The Julliard School” in New York City for his first choice of college, knowing full well that he probably wouldn’t be accepted. He figured that the audition process would be tougher there than at almost any other college and he hoped to learn from the experience.

We drove the five hours to New York City and while Adam waited for his time to audition I was surprised to see how nervous he actually was.
This was unusual. Adam was normally very confident when it came to acting and singing. I tried to get him to relax by joking around about the school’s “judges.” We both thought it would be amusing to have Rip Taylor, the silly confetti-throwing comedian, as one of the judges. Our bizarre sense of humor was very similar in those days and although it probably would not have amused any one else, we didn’t care. It was funny to Adam and me. When Adam was finished with his song, dance, and short monologue, the judges politely said, “Thank you.” What they really meant was, “No thanks. Next!” Adam appreciated that they were blunt so he wouldn’t be “strung-along” thinking that he might get accepted to this prestigious school.

Adam applied to several other colleges that were among the leading schools for Musical Theatre and although he was offered a large academic scholarship to “The University of Cincinnati,” he chose to attend “The Boston Conservatory” where he was offered no financial aid at all. He may have been influenced by the fact that his girlfriend, Meridith, was also attending “The Boston Conservatory.”

While Adam’s college search was going on, we were also trying to decide where Cassy would go for high school. “The Imago School,” (where both of my children went for grades one through eight) didn’t have a high school program and we assumed that Cassy would attend the same private high school that Adam had attended. Cassy took the admission test and did quite well, so we were surprised when we were told that she would be put on a waiting list for possible admission. It seems that the school was attempting to improve the “racial diversity” and since Cassy was a “middle class white girl” she wouldn’t be helping to achieve that goal. Since there were no other private Christian high schools in the area that we thought would be a good “fit” and Mal and I didn’t want to send Cassy to the local public high school, it seemed as if we had no convenient option. Drastic measures had to be considered.

Next chapter: My father is hospitalized.

Part One Hundred & Twenty One

I’m not a very trusting person anymore. I’ve been “let down” and disappointed by so many people over the course of my life that it has changed the way I think about things. Most businesses have lousy customer service. Many repairmen are unable to repair things. Government officials can’t be trusted. Many clergy are twisted individuals. Many doctors don’t seem interested or qualified to take care of us. I know that I’ve let down many people too, but right now, I’m “talking” about my experience with a couple of doctors.

My youngest brother, Rick, while in his twenties, experienced severe chest pains as he was on his way to work one day. He drove himself to a local community hospital and the “head” of cardiology eventually saw him. A little while later I got a phone call from my mother who was concerned because Rick was told he would need a pacemaker surgically
implanted to regulate his heart. I called Rick at the hospital and urged him to get a second opinion. Like most of us, he was reluctant to “embarrass” the doctor by doubting his expert diagnosis, but since this seemed to be an urgent situation, he got a second opinion. It turned out that Rick actually had “mononucleosis” and he didn’t need a pacemaker at all.

When I was a teenager, in the 1960’s, I remember my father suffering with pain for many years. He had been misdiagnosed and he thought he had an ulcer, but as it turned out, he had “Crohn’s Disease.” Many years later, my father was working as an electrical engineering contractor in South Carolina in the late 1990’s and he developed painful kidney stones. Knowing he’d be more comfortable dealing with his regular doctor, he endured the pain until his contract ended and he could seek medical help back home in Massachusetts. He knew he’d be more comfortable dealing with his regular doctor. By the time he returned to Massachusetts, the problem was much worse and required surgery to repair the damage.

After the surgery, my father didn’t seem to be getter any better. He remained in the hospital for several weeks and finally, the doctor called us all and suggested a “family meeting” to discuss the situation. The doctor explained that Dad’s condition was very serious but they were doing everything they could to cure him.

We all noticed that Dad was getting worse. One evening, when I went to visit him, Dad couldn’t seem to stay awake. As he tried to talk his eyes would roll back and he’d fall asleep. I was really getting worried now, so I called the doctor on call. He calmly explained that Dad was fighting an infection that was very serious and we needed to be aware that he could die from it. I asked what was being done to fight this infection and the doctor told me that Dad had been on a strong antibiotic for the past two weeks but it didn’t seem to be helping his condition. I asked if there was some other antibiotic that could be tried. There was a long pause. The doctor said, “Well….we could try another antibiotic.” The doctor came down and administered the other drug. The next morning my father was awake and sitting up in bed and he made a full recovery. I’d like to believe that some doctor would have eventually thought to try another drug, but I just can’t be sure.

So, what’s my point? For one thing, you need to watch and listen carefully to what the doctors and nurses are doing. Be assertive and assume that you are NOT going to get the best medical attention. Get a second opinion on any serious options. Do not blindly assume that the doctor knows what he or she is talking about. Have you ever thought that perhaps your doctor graduated medical school with a “D-?” They don’t all get “A’s.”

Next chapter: The end of 1997.

Part One Hundred & Twenty Two

As 1997 drew to a close, both of my kids were involved in a musical titled “Suddenly One Christmas Eve.” A talented husband-wife team who were friends of Cassy’s vocal teacher wrote this ambitious musical. Adam and Cassy were happy to “work” together for the first time since grade school but this required both of them to commit to dozens of hours of rehearsals on top of their already busy schedules. Adam was in the middle of his senior year of high school and Cassy was in the middle of the eighth grade. Adam was working every weekend to have money for car expenses and to save money for college. At the same time, Adam was also rehearsing for his high school’s big musical in which he had a huge part as multiple characters. Cassy’s schedule was loaded with voice, dance and flute lessons, and a challenging course of studies at her school.
But somehow they both made time for it all.

My wife and I were coming up to our 25th wedding anniversary within the next six months and we were thinking of something special to do to celebrate. We briefly considered a trip to Las Vegas to renew our vows with an Elvis impersonator but decided against it. While we were on a cruise in 1997 we thought it would be fun to have our entire family (sisters, brothers, and their spouses) all together on a cruise with us. We did some preliminary investigation into the cost of booking a vacation for over 30 relatives and although it was expensive, we were intrigued enough to still consider the idea.

When we got back after the cruise, we called each of our relatives and asked if they’d be interested in spending some vacation time with us on a “family cruise.” We offered to pay for everyone’s cruise but each person would be responsible for his or her own airfare to get to the Port of Miami. This would work out okay for many of our relatives because they had accumulated “frequent flyer miles” and could use these towards the trip. Even though we were planning to take our two kids with us, we decided that if our relatives wanted to bring any of their own children, they’d have to pay for them. To our surprise and delight, they all thought it would be possible to arrange the time off so they could come with us and the only children coming were my kids and my sister Sharon’s kids and they weren’t youngsters who would need lots of attention. Although none of our siblings’ kids are trouble, it would just be nice for the parents to be able to truly relax.

The next step was to contact Elsa, our travel agent, to see if she could put this all together. She tried “Royal Caribbean” first because we thought these cruise ships were a bit nicer than many of the other lines but the company wasn’t willing to give us a price that we thought was reasonable. Elsa tried “Carnival Cruise Line” and they were eager to offer us a good deal since we were booking so far in advance. We tentatively reserved fifteen cabins for a cruise that would go to the Caribbean during our 25th anniversary week. The total cost of this cruise (not counting my personal expenses) would be a bit over $30,000.
This would be, by far, the most expensive vacation we’d ever taken, but since our wedding hadn’t been a big lavish affair, we thought this could be fun. Most of our relatives had never been on a cruise before and we were excited to be with them all for their first time. There would be lots of logistical details to deal with over the next six months to make this vacation go smoothly but I was eager to do it. I’ll let you know how the trip went in a future chapter.

Next chapter: The story of two of my customers and friends: The Dinsdales

Part One Hundred & Twenty Three

Paul Dinsdale and Christine Carelli were both long-time customers and they had become good friends of mine through the store. Both collected comic books, but Paul was the “bigger” collector. He had started shopping at my store when he was a young kid and his enthusiasm for comic books grew over the years. He bought almost every comic book that DC Comics published and he also enjoyed most of the Marvel Comics. Paul came into the Worcester store a few days each week. He’d help us sort the new comic books, and do some general cleaning up while he visited with us. Christine came in once a week.

I had introduced them to each other and was instrumental in “setting them up” on their first date. They dated for a few years, “fell in love”
and married in 1993. They even asked me to be in their wedding. We were all very excited in 1997 when Christine revealed that she was expecting twins!

About five months later, on September 22nd, the Dinsdales’ were changed forever, as their babies were born four months prematurely.
Nicholas Dinsdale only weighed one pound, four and a half ounces and his twin brother, Daniel, was only slightly heavier. Both of these boys were in critical condition and required twenty-four hour care at the neonatal intensive care unit at Worcester’s Memorial Hospital. Although the doctors didn’t offer much hope, Paul and Christine had no choice but to trust the skilled medical staff to save the lives of their boys.

The two tiny babies struggled to stay alive. Paul and Christine spent many hours every day in the hospital by the boys’ bedside and did their best to maintain their work schedules. They were physically and emotionally exhausted all of the time. On December 1st, 1997, they got a phone call from a doctor in the middle of the night with the news they had feared the most. The doctor said that Nicholas, the smaller of the twins, was in “trouble” and he might be dead before Paul and Christine could get to the hospital.

Nicholas had struggled with breathing problems since his birth and it looked grim. Paul and Christine rushed to the hospital, praying all of the way, frustrated by the slow-moving traffic they encountered. The staff at the hospital had tried frantically to stabilize the tiny boy, but his lungs were failing. Even the sophisticated ventilator couldn’t help him. By the time Paul and Christine arrived, Nicholas was only getting half the oxygen he needed to survive.

A nurse decided to try an ancient technique that is being rediscovered in many hospitals around the world. It’s a form of skin-to-skin contact between the parent and the child where the baby is placed against the parent’s bare chest. The method is called “kangaroo care” because it resembles the way the pouched animals care for their young. For some unknown reason, it is especially effective with premature babies and there are sometimes amazing effects: a steadier heart rate, increased energy, better breathing, and deeper sleep.

As Nicholas’s blood-oxygen level continued to drop, the nurses placed the wriggling, “palm-sized” infant, with all of the tubes and monitor wires still attached, on Christine’s chest. Instantly, he started to relax and within twenty minutes his heart and pulse rates, and his oxygen level, was in the normal range! Soon he was resting more comfortably while his brother, Daniel, was sleeping in an incubator nearby. But Nicholas wasn’t out of danger yet. The Dinsdales, with the help of four family members, held Nicholas for thirty-two hours straight. Christine said, “He just responded so well to it. He loves to be held. It gives him security and calms him down.”

The kangaroo-care also gives parents a chance to bond with their babies, something that is hard to do through the thick plastic walls of an incubator. The Dinsdale twins were so sick at birth that their parents couldn’t hold them for the first thirty days of their lives. They could reach in and pat them but they had to be very careful. Their skin was like tissue paper. They also couldn’t even hear the babies cry because the breathing tubes inserted at birth kept their vocal cords from vibrating. Paul could tell that they were trying to cry though.
Their tiny mouths would quiver but there would be no sound.

Two weeks later Nicholas had grown to three pounds, nine ounces and Daniel was now four pounds seven ounces. Both boys were moved out of their individual incubators into a single crib in what is referred to as “double-bedding” of twins. Paul had hope that his boys would respond as positively to this “treatment” as Nicholas had to the kangaroo-care.
Paul had already learned the truth about life in the neonatal intensive care unit. Good things happen slowly and bad things happen fast.

The two boys suffered setbacks and underwent numerous surgeries for their lungs and eyes. Although there was some improvement in the boys’
condition, the doctors still offered little hope for their survival. Paul remained positive and always seemed convinced that they’d make it despite the odds. Through it all, it was the boys’ parent’s faith in God that made this emotional “roller coaster ride” bearable. Paul and Christine believed that God would “pull the boys through” and that they would finally be able to get out of the hospital.

On February 14th, 1998, after nearly five months, Nicholas died.
Within twenty-four hours, Daniel died.

We were all heartbroken for Paul and Christine, but most of us certainly had no idea how a loss like this could really hurt.

Part One Hundred & Twenty Four

Although I wasn’t on a regular work schedule since my “retirement” from my comic book and collectible stores, I’d still occasionally go in (usually unannounced) to check up on things. I thought we had a pretty good group of employees, all under the leadership of my long-time, “right-hand guy” Chris. Over the past year we had lost Jose Rivera (a customer favorite) and Richard Ortwein, who returned to social work, but everyone else seemed happy and professional. The stores continued to be profitable and we were all getting paid.

On one rare occasion when I was in the Worcester store, I ran into one of my customers who worked for the big city newspaper. I mentioned to him that I was confused by the newspaper’s indifference to my “press release” about our being awarded the “Will Eisner Spirit of Comic Book Retailing Award.” I explained to him that this international recognition is something that we were very proud of and it seemed to me as if it would make an interesting local story but the editorial staff wasn’t interested in interviewing us about it. He said he’d mention it in the next editorial meeting and within a week he was assigned as a reporter to write a story about us. On February 5, 1998, they published this article:

If you buy comic books in the Worcester area, chances are you know Paul B. Howley. At least you know his store, That’s Entertainment, at
244 Park Avenue.

That’s Entertainment carries 1200 different comic book titles each month. In addition to comic books, the shop deals in a variety of pop-culture items, including toys, trading cards, sports merchandise and autographed memorabilia. With 12,000 square feet of retail space, Howley says That’s Entertainment is the largest collectibles store in New England.

Howley was recently honored with the “Will Eisner Spirit of Comics Retailing Award.” Named after the creator of the 1940’s masked crime fighter, “The Spirit,” the Eisner Award is the Academy Award of the comic book industry.

It’s a worldwide competition for which every comic book store is eligible. Nominees are judged on their knowledge of retailing and the comics field, community activity and the quality of their store’s image.

Howley was an ordinary 5-year-old whose life changed when a friend of his grandmother gave him a “Batman” comic book. He was hooked. “I loved reading about Batman and I bought everything I could find him in. That was before he TV show,” Howley said.

As Howley’s love for the 12-cent magazines grew daily, his parents used their son’s obsession as an incentive to make him complete chores around the house and as a reward for achieving small milestones in his young life.

“My parents actually have film of me trying to pull out one of my front teeth,” said Howley. “We tied a string to the door and to my tooth. We slammed the door and yanked my tooth out. As a reward for that, I got $2.00 worth of comic books.”

When Howley started dating his future wife, the former Mal Daher, he was forced to choose between courtship and comics due to limited finances. He chose courtship.

After he got married in 1973, his wife, knowing that her husband had been a collector, asked to see his comics. Howley pulled down his well-read books from the attic. When his wife saw the beaten-up comics, she encouraged him to replace them with ones in “really nice shape.”
Inspired by his wife’s support, Howley searched for an outlet to do just that. Soon, his passion for comics resurfaced.

Later that year, Howley got his first taste for buying and selling comic books, retailing at small comic book conventions in Boston. He continued to buy and sell at conventions in Boston and New York for the next three years.

Howley moved to Tennessee in 1976 to open and manage a store for a comic book retailer. A year later, a comic book retailer from Ohio offered Howley a job. He was promised an annual salary $10,000 higher than in Tennessee and weekends off. The promise didn’t pan out and, in the first year, he worked forty-two weekends, traveling around the country to comic book conventions, his loyal wife always by his side.
“It just made me realize that the way to go was to be on my own. That way, nobody could break their promises,” Howley said. “I never complained because I was learning the whole time that I was doing it.”

Eventually, the grueling schedule, Howley’s desire to settle down and raise a family, and the inability to develop a relationship with his customers, finally took its toll. Howley wanted out.
“You’re selling to some faceless guy and you don’t know who he is.
You’re just selling your comics. I wanted a stable business where I knew the customers by name. I know what their interests are. I know what to buy because I know what my customers want. Some of my best friends have started out as customers.”

Howley opened That’s Entertainment on Chandler Street in 1980. He moved to Park Avenue in 1992, and he also owns a store in Wallace Plaza on John Fitch Highway in Fitchburg.

“When I opened my store on Chandler Street, it was because I needed space in my house and the place was as cheap to rent as a warehouse space. It was only going to be a warehouse, and then I thought, “Since I’m here anyway I might as well open to the public.” On the first day, we made enough to pay for the first month’s expenses.”

In 1992, retail sales of comic books totaled more than one billion dollars. Those numbers have dropped by 60 percent in the last five years, Howley said. Almost 10,000 comic book stores have closed in the United States since 1992, leaving perhaps 4,000 stores nationwide.

“This is the single worst time to open a comic book business. Never in history has it been this bad. When we first opened, you could open a store for $5,000, and we know because we did,” Howley said. He said that a store like his would now cost $150,000 to start. “We started at exactly the right time.”

Howley says interest in comics is waning in light of the popularity of computer games, video games and movies. “Most kids don’t want to read. So, just because comics are great fun and exciting is not enough to make them spend $2 on it when they can rent a video game for $2 and have things exploding right in their face,” he said. “We encourage comic books because it really fosters a love for reading. Comics got me through high school.”

This newspaper article also included a full-color photograph of me holding my “Eisner” statue. The publicity got our name out to the local community again and I’m sure we developed new customers because of it.
Overall, even though comic book sales had dropped, our business was better than ever.

Meanwhile, my son, Adam, was very busy finishing up his senior year of high school. We were still traveling so that Adam could audition for a slot in different colleges’ Musical Theatre Programs. Adam was also preparing to be in the school’s musical production of “Working.” The drama teacher told me that this project would be a major “showcase” for Adam’s singing, acting, and dancing abilities. He was going to play several major characters in this play. We were all excited to see this production, but two days before the performance, I came down with the flu. I don’t often get sick, but when I do it seems to be serious. I had a very high fever and on the night of his play I couldn’t go. I was lying in my bed and was almost delirious with fever but I remember Adam was so worried about me that he was crying as he stood next to my bed.
This was the only one of his performances that I had missed. I heard that it was a wonderful performance.

Thankfully, a few days later, the school did an abridged performance that included many of Adam’s parts and I was able to go to see it. He was really good. Mal and I were eagerly looking forward to seeing Adam’s performances when he got to college!

Next chapter: An old friend returns and we open a new store in Rhode Island.

Part One Hundred & Twenty Five

In 1998, my tenant, Gary, who rented out part of my commercial building in Worcester, the owner of “The Halloween Outlet,” decided to buy a small retail plaza in Woonsocket, Rhode Island. He bought it at a reasonable price but several of the stores were empty. The plaza wasn’t in a particularly good location and it was hard to see from the main roads that went through the neighborhood. He jokingly suggested that I open another comic book and collectible store in one of his available storefronts. I politely declined his offer.

At about the same time, I got a phone call from Pat Donley, a former employee and a friend. He had left “That’s Entertainment” many years ago and had opened a comic book and collectible store in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Pat wanted to get married and raise his family near where most of his relatives still lived. I certainly understood. But after running his store during the “lean years” of the comic book industry, Pat was interested in earning more money to support his wife and children. He contacted me and asked if I would be interested in finding an opening in our organization for him. After some thought, I called him back and asked if he’d be interested in opening and running a new store in Rhode Island. Pat quickly sold his store to an interested party and convinced his wife to uproot the family and come back to New England.

I went back to my tenant, Gary, and told him that I was reconsidering locating a new store in his Rhode Island plaza. He offered me a reasonable rent on the space and I made it clear that I’d rent it on a month-to-month basis and I was not interested in making any long-term commitment. Gary was very easy to deal with and we shook hands on our agreement. No written contracts were necessary because we trusted each other. It was a refreshing way of doing business.

Before Pat arrived in Massachusetts my employees sorted through our massive inventory of back issue comic books and made a decent stock for our upcoming new store. They also selected lots of toys, trading cards and movies from our overstock. We had extra display racks and shelves available so we wouldn’t have huge initial set-up costs. By the time Pat arrived he sorted through hundreds of expensive “display” comic books and chose an assortment that would cover one of the walls of the new store. He also had to concentrate on finding an apartment for his family to live in partway between Woonsocket, Rhode Island and Worcester, Massachusetts. Pat found a convenient location, close to a small “downtown” shopping area, and with all of these details taken care of; we opened our Rhode Island store in early 1998.

I trusted that Pat could handle all of the assorted details that come up when you run a store since he had successfully opened and managed his own store in Pennsylvania. I had enough stuff going on in my “personal” life, so I knew I couldn’t be much help to Pat. My son, Adam, was halfway through his senior year in high school and there were lots of details to complete before his graduation. One of the graduation requirements was that all seniors had to “intern” for two weeks somewhere in a field of interest to them, preferably in the type of job they wanted to go into after college.

Mal and I discussed the many possibilities with Adam and we all decided that it might be fun if Adam could intern for my good friend, Kevin Burns. Kevin used to be a college professor in the Boston area and he had moved to California to take a job at Twentieth Century Fox. Over a period of a few years, Kevin moved up the corporate ladder and he was now a Vice President at the studio. Adam’s strong interest in theatre and acting seemed to make this a wonderful opportunity. Adam wrote to Kevin, offering his services for the two-week period. Kevin called Adam and discussed the details and soon agreed to let Adam work directly for him. Adam was very excited about this trip to Hollywood. Adam couldn’t really go out there alone because he was too young to rent a hotel room or rent a car, so I decided to go along. I hadn’t seen Kevin in quite a while so I knew that part would be pleasant. I did, however, have my doubts about Adam and I getting along for two weeks in a hotel room together.

Next chapter: The California trip.

Part One Hundred & Twenty Six

“Adam and I take a three week trip to California”

As part of the requirements for Adam to graduate from his high school, Lexington Christian Academy, he needed to “intern” somewhere in a field of interest for him. Adam had a serious interest in acting so he asked my friend, Kevin Burns, for the opportunity to intern for Twentieth Century Fox Studios in California. Kevin, a vice president there, was in charge of producing most of the A+E Biography television shows and he agreed to allow Adam to work there. Since Adam was too young to rent a hotel room or car, I decided to go out to California with him. On one hand, this trip could be a disaster because Adam and I didn’t always get along and it could be a nightmare being stuck in a small hotel room together for almost three weeks. On the other hand, it could be a good opportunity for Adam and I to get closer as father and son, especially since he’d be moving away to go to college soon.

I had no real idea of how much money to bring on a long trip like this, but since I don’t like to use my credit card, I brought what I thought would be enough cash to cover most of our expenses including food, gas, and some entertainment. We packed our suitcases, said goodbye to Mal and Cassy, and flew to Los Angeles. After we landed and got our rental car, we drove around Los Angeles until we located the office that Adam would be working in so we wouldn’t get lost and be late for his first day of work. Adam thought that this was a waste of time but he knew this wasn’t open for “discussion.” I liked to be prepared. With that detail out of the way, we headed to our hotel.

Elsa, my favorite travel agent booked us into a reasonably priced hotel about twenty miles from the Fox Studio’s lot where Adam would be working. I wrongly assumed that this would require about a half-hour of commuting time each morning. Although the hotel was very close to the major highway that we’d travel on, it ended up taking us anywhere from one hour to one and a half hours to make the trip each way because of the heavy traffic. It was one of the biggest inconveniences of “living” in Los Angeles. One of the nice conveniences was the selection of restaurants available to us. The tiny town where we lived in Massachusetts had no such dining options. Adam and I were not gourmet eaters (we preferred quantity over quality) so we frequently chose to eat at “Taco Bell.” In fact, one day, we ate there three times!

When we arrived (on time, of course) at Fox Studio for Adam’s first day of work, Kevin Burns had left authorization with the guard so that we could get inside the studio lot. We were directed past the soundstage where the television show, “N.Y.P.D. Blue,” was filmed (a short distance from Kevin’s office bungalow) but I was disappointed that the year’s episodes were already all filmed so the soundstage was empty. Kevin introduced us to his assistant, Scott, and his secretary. This was the only staff that Kevin employed to work with him in this office but he had many more employees at his much larger offices on Van Ness Boulevard in Hollywood. Adam spent his first day on the Fox Studio lot working mostly with Scott. Rather than just hang around, I drove around the city of Los Angeles, checking out the local comic book stores. Most of the stores had weak inventories of vintage comic books and collectibles but mainly focused on new product. This new stuff didn’t interest me much because I had access to all of same material at my own comic book and collectible stores, “That’s Entertainment,” in Massachusetts. I was hoping to be able to buy some old comic books that my customers needed to finish their collections but I had no luck at the retail comic stores in Los Angeles. I would get luckier on my first weekend in California.

Next chapter: Adam and I find a local flea market and make a great “connection.”

Part One Hundred & Twenty Seven

“Adam and I spend three weeks in California: Part Two”

While my son, Adam, was working as an intern at Twentieth Century Fox Studios, I was checking out the comic book and collectible stores in the Los Angeles area. I wanted to buy some vintage comic books for my customers back in Massachusetts but I hadn’t been successful. The stores just didn’t have good inventories of older comics.

There was a good-sized, once a month flea market near the hotel that Adam and I were staying at and we decided to go to it after Adam’s first week of work. We looked through dozens of booths full of glassware, military souvenirs, postcards, and lots of Disney collectibles. We also found two separate guys who dealt in comic books. As I looked through the stock at each of the booths, I was surprised to find a nice selection of comics from the 1950’s and 1960’s. One of the dealers was rather high-priced on most of his stock but I was able to buy a handful of vintage comics from him that he had dramatically under-priced. I knew that these would sell right away at my stores. My customers would be eager to buy these comics and I’d be able to make a little bit of profit on the sale too.

The other dealer had his comics priced fairly but as I was looking through his boxes of inventory, I asked the “all-important” question, “If I buy a bunch of these will you give me a better price?” He eagerly offered me a fifty-percent discount if I spent over two hundred dollars.
That was going to be pretty easy to do since he had multiple copies of “Mystery In Space” issue #53 (the beginning of the Adam Strange
storyline) and these were priced at almost $100 each! Within a half hour, I had already spent over $1000 at his booth and I was almost out of money. When I was done, I was smart enough to ask him if he had any more comic books back at his house. He gave me his address and phone number and we made plans to meet at his house during the next week while Adam was working.

The next day, after bringing Adam to his workplace, I called the comic dealer and got directions to his home that was about 75 miles away. Since I was almost out of cash and I still had almost two more weeks to be out in California I went to a local bank to get a cash advance on my credit card. I took out $4000 to (hopefully) spend on much needed vintage comics for my customers. I had never taken a cash advance before so I was surprised to find out that I would be charged a three percent fee, based on the amount I withdrew, and that the interest would begin from the day the money was withdrawn. Even with these high costs for this borrowed money, it still was worth doing.

When I arrived at his house, he showed me to a room piled high with boxes of unsorted comic books. These comics were published from the 1950’s to the 1980’s and none of them had been priced yet. This complicated the procedure. I had to select a comic book and wait for the guy to look it up in the comic book price guide before he’d quote me a price on it. If the price was too high, I’d put it back in his box. If the price was reasonable, I’d keep the book and record the price on a sheet of paper to be tallied up at the end of our time together. It was a slow and ponderous way to buy old comics but it wasn’t up to me. This was the way he wanted to do it. After several hours, I agreed to pay him almost $4000 for fourteen full boxes of vintage comic books. I somehow managed to stuff all of these boxes into my tiny rental car and returned to my hotel room to unload these treasures before it was time to go back to Hollywood to get Adam.

When I returned from picking up Adam, I spent hours going through the great assortment of vintage comics. This collection was great and I knew that almost every one of these comics were needed in my store inventory. I realized though, that now I was worried about leaving over $10,000 worth of valuable comic books in my hotel room! I requested that the hotel maids stay out of our room for a few days but I was still concerned about the security and safety of this collection. I could carefully pack these all up and ship them up to my store but it would cost hundreds of dollars and there would be no way to properly insure such a shipment. Most shipping insurance specifically excludes collectibles in their coverage, so a comic book from the 1950’s that originally cost ten cents could only be insured for ten cents even though it is currently worth hundreds of dollars! I couldn’t take that chance.

I decided to try a different option. I sorted through the collection one day and pulled out about 600 of the comics that I knew would sell right away and I loaded them back into my rental car. I drove to the famous comic book store, “The Golden Apple” on Melrose Avenue, and asked to speak to the owner, Bill Liebowitz. Bill was one of the best-known figures in the field of comic book retailing and his store was known all over the country. When he was told that I wanted to see him, he came out of the back room right away and greeted me with his “trademark”
enthusiasm. I had only spoken to Bill once before while we both attended a retailing seminar and I was surprised that he’d even remember me. I explained to him about my newly purchased collection of vintage comics that I didn’t want to ship back to my store. I suggested that he should buy the comic books from me. I offered him the whole lot that I had in my rental car for $6000. He thought for a few moments and asked, “Is that a good deal?” I said I thought it was a great deal. Without even looking at the collection, he said, “Okay. I’ll take it.” He went out back and wrote me a check while I unloaded the collection from my car. It was one of the easiest deals I had ever made.

In this deal, everyone ended up satisfied. The man I bought these comics from got the full price he wanted. Bill got twelve boxes of very desirable silver-age comic books at a reasonable price and I ended up with about 600 fantastic comics plus a profit on the whole collection!

Next chapter: Adam’s job and Kevin Burns introduces us to celebrities in California.

Part One Hundred & Twenty Eight

“The California Trip Part Three”

As a requirement for his high school graduation, my son Adam, needed to “intern” at a job related to his future career. Adam contacted my friend, Kevin Burns, who was now a vice president at Twentieth Century Fox Studios in California. Since Adam was too young to rent a hotel room or a rental car, I decided that I had to go there with him. Although Adam worked as an employee during the day, Kevin arranged lots of entertainment for us for “after hours.”

The first Saturday we were in Los Angeles, Kevin took us to the home of Bob Burns (no relation of Kevin), the world famous collector of Hollywood science fiction and horror movie props. Bob Burns met us the door and gave us a short tour through his museum/home full of original motion picture props including a full-sized “Queen Alien” model from the movie of “Aliens,” the original feet from “The Creature of the Black Lagoon,” the working model from “Mighty Joe Young,” the fully-restored original 1960’s Time Machine from George Pal’s “The Time Machine,” and the actual “ball and socket” model from the 1930’s movie of “King Kong.” This model was used to create the stop-motion action of King Kong. It was originally covered in a fake fur but it now had deteriorated so much that there was only one small bit of fur left on it! There were also hundreds of other rare items displayed and stacked up all around the room. It was a delight for me since I was such a big collector of memorabilia. Adam enjoyed it too, even though he wasn’t much of a collector.

Bob Burns brought us upstairs into his residence and introduced us to a few of his friends who were visiting him for the day. One of the guests was Dan Roebuck who had just finished a regular co-starring role on the popular television show “Matlock” starring Andy Griffith. Dan played Ben Matlock’s assistant, Cliff Lewis, and I was happy to meet him, as Matlock was one of my favorite TV shows. We sat around with this interesting group of people, discussing old movies and television shows.

Later that evening, Kevin Burns treated Adam and I to dinner at the restaurant where one of Adam’s favorite movies, “Swingers,” was filmed.
We were joined by Forrest J Ackerman, one of the creators of the most popular magazine about classic horror movies, “Famous Monsters of Filmland.” Mr. Ackerman wrote, edited and managed this publication from the late 1950’s to the 1970’s. He was also the owner of the world-famous “Ackermansion.” This was actually his seventeen-room home filled with some truly amazing science fiction and horror collectibles. Forry (as he was called) was a true fan of these genres and he was quite a “pack-rat.” He had thousands of rare pulp magazines from the 1930’s, vintage science fiction paperback books and lots of original artwork from these publications and he enjoyed sharing his collection with other fans. Unfortunately, Forry was too trusting and several unscrupulous people took advantage of his kindness and actually stole many of his prized collectibles over a period of several years. Although Forry was in his very late seventies, he was “sharp as a tack” and an entertaining dinner companion.

During the next business week Kevin closed his office for the day and took his assistant, his secretary, Adam and me to Disneyland for the day. Adam was thrilled because although he had been to Disney World many times and he’d been to Disneyland Paris, he had never been to Disneyland. We had a great time together.

The next weekend, as we were driving around Los Angeles with Kevin, Adam and I mentioned that we had been searching the local McDonald’s restaurants looking for the newest release of the “Teeny Beanie Babies” animals. My wife, Mal, and my daughter, Cassy, were collecting these as part of their “Beanie Babies” collection and we didn’t have any McDonald’s near where we lived in Massachusetts so Adam and I thought we’d find these in California for them. Kevin remembered that his friend, Bill Mumy, the actor who portrayed Will Robinson on “Lost In Space,” was also looking for these Beanie Babies for his wife’s collection. Kevin called Bill and told him that we had found a few that he might want and Bill invited us to stop by his home. I had met Bill Mumy several years previously when he appeared at my store as a guest but I was surprised that he remembered me.

Bill introduced us to his family and gave us a “guided tour” of his collection of golden-age comic books. He also showed us his impressive collection of rare “Pez” dispensers. We talked about his long career in Hollywood, including his roles in “The Twilight Zone,” “Bewitched,”“Lost In Space,” and “Babylon 5.” After a very pleasant visit, as we were leaving we noticed his young son excitedly playing with vintage G. I. Joe dolls that were from Bill’s childhood. I told Bill that there were great reproductions of these G.I. Joe’s available at my store and I promised him that I’d send him one so that his son could enjoy it without worrying about the “collector’s value” of Bill’s originals. Bill expressed his “thanks” and we left. On the way back to Kevin’s home, Kevin called Jonathan Harris on his car speakerphone. Jonathan was the actor who portrayed Dr. Zachary Smith on the TV show of “Lost In Space” and he was one of Kevin’s good friends. We all laughed when Jonathan expressed his brutally honest opinion of the recent theatrical remake of “Lost In Space” that starred William Hurt. He certainly didn’t like it!

Later that evening, we were all invited to dinner at the home of Dan Roebuck and his family. After a delicious home-cooked turkey dinner, Dan gave us a tour of his fantastic collection of monster collectibles, including lots of rare Dracula, Creature of the Black Lagoon, and Planet of the Apes items. We visited with him long into the evening, and just before we left, he asked us if we’d be interested in seeing one of the original seersucker suits worn by Andy Griffith in the TV show “Matlock.” Adam actually asked if he could try on the suit and Dan allowed both Adam and I to do just that! For all of the years since our visit, I have followed Dan Roebuck’s career with great interest. He has had dozens of movie roles and played in several television series including “The Fugitive” with Harrison Ford, “U.S. Marshals” with Tommy Lee Jones, “Nash Bridges” with Don Johnson, “A Minute With Stan Hooper” with Norm MacDonald, “ER,” “Cold Case,” “Becker,” “NYPD Blue,” “Boston Public,” “Judging Amy,” “Malcolm In The Middle,” “The Drew Carey Show,” “The Pretender,” “The King of Queens,” and “Monk.” Dan has also been seen in three episodes of ABC-TV’s hit series “Lost” and is currently in a recurring role on the huge hit “Desperate Housewives.” He’s such a nice guy and deserves all of the success that he’s had in Hollywood.

Next chapter: The conclusion to our California trip.

Part One Hundred & Twenty Nine

“The California Trip: Part Four”

In 1998, my son, Adam, and I spent three weeks in California together because, as part of his high school graduation requirement, he was interning for my friend Kevin Burns who was a vice president at Twentieth Century Fox Studios. I was quite concerned that spending three weeks together in a small hotel room could cause conflicts between us so I tried to plan some fun things for the time that Adam wasn’t working.

I allowed Adam to chose a restaurant each night for dinner. Most of the time he was happy to eat at “Taco Bell.” As long as there was plenty of food to eat, Adam was satisfied. We also spent several nights searching local used clothing stores on a hunt for an authentic “Zoot Suit.” Adam was very interested in swing-dancing at that time and he knew his best-friend Phil Doreau would get a kick out of seeing him in a real “Zoot Suit.” Adam finally found something pretty close to authentic. Although I hated to spend time shopping, Adam loved to shop, especially when his parents were paying. Shoes, clothes and music were his favorite things to buy. I didn’t always understand this. I figured most men only really needed one pair of shoes and a pair of sneakers.
Adam had dozens of pairs of shoes. It was obvious that Adam and I were different, although many people thought we were quite similar.

We were the same in one way though. We both missed the women in our lives. I missed my wife, Mal, very much, and I certainly missed my “little princess,” Cassy. I called them every day that we were away. This was before the convenience of inexpensive cell-phones so every call had to be made from our hotel room at great expense. As important as these calls were for me, I knew that Adam needed to talk with his girlfriend, Meridith, each day too. Over the three weeks we were in California I’m sure we spent hundreds of dollars on phone calls to our loved ones. It was an expense I was certainly willing to spend and Adam appreciated it.

Adam and I both loved to go to see movies and we decided we “needed”
to see a major film while we were in Hollywood. The huge blockbuster, “Godzilla” was opening one night so we chose this as the movie to see and found a state-of-the-art theatre that was showing it on a 90-foot-long screen with “surround-sound.” I contacted Tony Russo, a good customer and a friend from my Worcester store who had recently moved to the Hollywood area, to see if he’d also enjoy going to the movies with us. Although the movie wasn’t a great film, it was nice to see it in such a beautifully equipped theatre.

Adam and I started each weekday morning by watching a television news show called “Good Day, Los Angeles.” The show was a standard mix of news and entertainment but there was a difference. There was a female cast member named Jillian Barberie who seemed to understand how “cheesy” the show was and she was frequently sarcastic to the other news-anchors. She was so entertaining that it was the perfect encouragement to get Adam to wake up on time each morning for work. We were both eager to see what she would do or say next. One morning while we were watching, there was a story about a murder in Encino, California and the police believed that the murderer was still in the victim’s home. It didn’t take long before the reporters on the scene revealed that the murdered man was Phil Hartman. Phil Hartman was an actor that Adam and I enjoyed because of his work on “Saturday Night Live,” “News Radio,” and as the voice of Troy McClure and Lionel Hutz on “The Simpsons.” Sadly, we watched the television while it was reported that Hartman’s wife, Brynn, was revealed to be the killer. She shot him while he slept and then committed suicide with her two children in the home.

There was another celebrity death while we were in California. On May 14, 1998 Frank Sinatra died. Adam was at work and I was sitting in my hotel room when I heard the news of Sinatra’s death on the television. I called my wife, Mal, to ask her if she’d heard the news. Mal knew how much I loved Frank Sinatra’s music and we talked about what a significant influence he had on the music world. Later that day I got a phone call from my brother-in-law Greg. He had heard the news about Sinatra and he called me “just to make sure I was okay.” I was very touched that he was so thoughtful but I explained that this wouldn’t affect me in the same way as the death of John Lennon. Lennon was murdered and he still could have created music for several more decades.
Frank Sinatra had lived a full life. His health had deteriorated. The last time I saw Frank Sinatra in concert (in 1992 or 1993) he needed huge “tele-prompters” because he had trouble remembering the lyrics to songs that he had been singing for almost forty years. Soon after that, he was no longer physically able to perform in concerts or record new music. Every bit of music that Frank Sinatra would ever create was already done and, thankfully, it was readily available for music fans.
If there had been a possibility that Frank Sinatra could have gotten his health back so that he could sing again, I would have been sad because of the loss of potential. In this case, knowing this was not meant to be, I felt sympathy for Sinatra’s family but not for me. I’d still have his music. In hindsight, it still surprises me that out of all of my family and friends who were all aware of my “obsession” with Sinatra, only Greg called to see how I was affected by his death.

The very next day, as Adam and I were visiting with my friend, Kevin Burns, he received a phone call from a close friend of Nancy Sinatra who asked if they could meet to discuss something important. This man came rushing over to Kevin’s beautiful Beverly Hills home to “pitch” a television idea to Kevin. We all talked a little bit about Frank Sinatra and the man told us some of the details about the funeral arrangements. It was eerie that I was suddenly privy to information that most of the general public would never know.

The visitor was also the manager of Stefanie Powers, the actress from the television shows of “The Girl From Uncle (a short-lived spin-off of “The Man From Uncle”),” Hart to Hart,” and most recently, the “Hart to Hart Reunion” television movies. He explained that the “Hart to Hart” movies were coming to an end and then proceeded to “pitch” an idea for a potential new series of “The Girl From Uncle” in which Stefanie Powers would portray the head of the Uncle organization. Kevin respectfully listened to the ideas, gave some advice to Ms. Powers’ manager, and the visitor left. During our three-week stay in Hollywood Adam and I met some very nice people who were connected to show business in various ways but we also noticed that there were some people who seemed to use the friendship “angle” to constantly try to get something for themselves out of the relationship. We both felt badly for Kevin sometimes. I was glad that Adam wasn’t getting paid for his intern work for Kevin so that I wouldn’t be taking advantage of my true friendship with Kevin.

When Adam’s internship was completed, we returned home to Massachusetts with good memories. Kevin Burns was a wonderful and entertaining host. Adam wrote his “journal” report that was part of the requirement for his high school graduation and received an “A” for his effort. His graduation was coming soon. He was almost done with his high school experience but he had still not made a final decision about where he was going to go to college. We also had not found a high school for our daughter to go to and we didn’t have any reasonable options.

Next chapter: We come up with a “crazy” idea!

Part 110 - 119

2009-12-07T08:49:00.001-08:00

Part One Hundred & Ten

I learned that “The Monkees” were going to be performing at the “Foxwoods Casino” in Connecticut in late 1996 so I got tickets for myself, Mal, Cassy, my sister Sharon, and her youngest child, Jacob. Sharon had been a big fan of Davy Jones during the initial years that “The Monkees” television show ran on American TV and she had even written a “love letter” to Davy and was disappointed that he didn’t reply. I knew she’d get a kick out of finally seeing them in concert.

As usual, The Monkees put on a really fun concert as they sang updated versions of “hit” song after “hit” song. Towards the middle of their show, Peter Tork, Micky Dolenz, and Davy Jones would each sing a few solo songs to showcase their individual non-Monkee musical interests. Peter played a couple of banjo songs and I can’t remember what Micky played but they were both entertaining. Davy Jones was far more memorable. He knew how to “work” the audience of mostly middle-aged women as they squealed with delight while he danced around the stage. He also sang “Girl,” which was the song he sang as a solo artist on “The Brady Bunch” TV show after The Monkees had been canceled. Davy came down from the stage while he was singing and moved up and down the aisles as many women desperately tried to touch or kiss him. He shook their hands but avoided kissing any of them until he got to my group. He saw my daughter, Cassy, and bent down to give her a kiss, then he continued running through the aisles, (kissing no one else) until he finished singing the song up on the stage.

The woman sitting next to Cassy said, “Oh, you must be so excited that Davy kissed only you!” Cassy replied, “Oh, that’s not so special. I sat on his lap and shared a tuna fish sandwich with him.” Cassy was referring to the time that Davy Jones was a guest at my comic book and collectibles store in 1993. The woman didn’t know what to make of Cassy.
I was left wondering if Davy Jones actually remembered Cassy from three years ago! (I’d find out about five years later…but that’s a story for another time.)

Next chapter: The end of 1996.

Part One Hundred & Eleven

For Thanksgiving of 1996, we decided to travel to New York City to watch the 70th Annual Macy’s Day Parade, in person. Cassy had never been to see the parade and although we had taken Adam there when he was a toddler, he didn’t really remember much about it. It was a tradition for our family to watch the parade on television each Thanksgiving but this would be so much more fun. Traveling became easier and more pleasant as our kids got older.

Elsa, our travel agent, booked us into a hotel that was very close to the parade route and it was an easy walk to Broadway and Times Square.
As usual, the prices in New York City are outrageous and this was one of the most expensive hotel rooms I’d ever had but it would be worth the expense to enjoy some fun “family time.” Often, we would encourage our kids to each invite a friend to come with us on our trips but at this stage in his life, Adam was really only interested in bringing his “girlfriend” Meridith as his guest. Mal and I both liked Meridith but we knew that if Adam had his girlfriend with him he’d ignore the rest of us. Her presence would significantly change the dynamics of our family trip so we decided to just go as a family with no “extra” people.

We drove our mini-van the five hours to New York City and Cassy was surprised to see how run-down the city appeared. She was a bit frightened by big cities at that time while Adam loved the excitement and opportunities that big cities offered. Adam frequently ventured into Boston to explore the city with Meridith and his best “guy” friend from high school, Phil Doreau. The aggressive drivers or the poorly designed roads of Boston didn’t intimidate Adam even though he was an inexperienced driver.

After we checked into our hotel room we walked to the discount ticket center to see which plays were playing on Broadway. Adam wanted to see something new and “edgy” since he had become sort of a “Broadway Snob.” He looked down on almost any play that was commercially successful. Originally, Adam was willing to work as an actor in film and television if the opportunity came up but since he fell in love with Meridith he had pretty much given up on any type of acting other than live theater. I used to explain to Adam that I believed that there needed to be a combination of business and art in order for the artist to effectively reach an audience with his work. Adam would reluctantly agree with me. On this day however, he had no choice since I was paying for the tickets. We eventually chose the revival of “Show Boat.”

The play was great (even Adam liked it) but I was mostly impressed with the gorgeous scenery and the ease with which each scene change was accomplished.

We got up early the next day to get a “prime” spot to watch the Macy’s Day Parade. We were stunned to feel the bitter cold wind whipping through the streets of Manhattan. The temperature was a record 21 degrees and we were freezing cold for almost two hours while we were waiting for the parade to begin. By the time the parade actually started, the sidewalks and side streets were jammed with thousands of people. We watched colorful floats, marching bands, and the helium-filled giant balloon figures of Underdog, Bullwinkle, The Pink Panther, and many more. But the most memorable part for my kids was the float with people throwing packages of a new product by “Ocean Spray”
called “Craisins,” which were sweetened dried cranberries. We must have eaten a few dozen packages of them! For many years, I intended to try giving away free comic books from a float in Worcester’s huge Saint Patrick’s Day Parade but it seems to slip my mind every year.

About an hour after the parade started, our feet, hands and faces became almost numb with cold, so we went back to our nice, warm hotel room to watch the rest of it on television.

Next chapter: Mal starts a business of her own in 1997.

Part One Hundred & Twelve

After our success with having Ty Law of the New England Patriots as a guest at one of our stores, Chris (the overall company manager) quickly made agreements with several other Patriots to appear. We were able to get these football players for a very reasonable price because the Patriots were not a winning team at that point. A month later, they won the AFC East Conference and if we tried to get them for an appearance we would have had to pay four or five times as much!

On January 6th, 1997, we were honored to have Ted Johnson and Adam Vinatieri as our guests. It had been our store “policy” that we didn’t want to charge our customers for the celebrity autographs but even though the fee we had agreed to pay these players wasn’t outrageously high, we needed to recoup some of our event costs by charging a nominal fee this time. We all decided to charge $3.00 for a single autograph or $5.00 for both athletes’ autographs. We hoped that almost everyone would want them both so that neither of the athletes would feel unpopular.
Thankfully, that’s what happened. Fans seemed delighted to buy one of each guy’s signatures! We learned that our customers were not unwilling to pay a fee for the autograph as long as it was reasonable. This new knowledge would allow us to take bigger financial risks and get “bigger” celebrities. Over the next few months we hosted many more New England Patriots players including Vincent Brisby, Chris Canty, Jimmy Hitchcock, Dave Wohlabaugh, and others at our Fitchburg and Worcester stores.

In February of 1997, I was invited to attend another “Father-Daughter” breakfast at the church where my daughter, Cassy, attended a “girl scout-type” of program called “Pioneer Girls.” Cassy and I went to these for several years and it was an event that I looked forward to each year. The young girls helped prepare the food (with lots of help from a hard-working group of Moms) and they also provided the entertainment. Sometimes it was small “skits” and other times it was music and song. One of the highlights each year was the “color contest.” Each father-daughter team was judged to determine who was wearing the most clothing of a chosen color and the winning couple would win a prize. Cassy really wanted to win each year, so I’d do the best I could (within
reason) to help. One year, the chosen color was purple and I didn’t own anything that was colored purple. I decided that this called for drastic measures so I went to the business that was renting part of my commercial building in Worcester. “The Halloween Outlet” offered thousands of costumes and accessories for sale and they also had a decent costume rental section so I borrowed a full-size costume of “Barney the (very purple!) Dinosaur” from the hit PBS television show. Although we easily won the color contest, I hadn’t anticipated the excitement of the very young girls as I walked in as their favorite TV character, Barney. Some of these kids were only five or six years old and even though I was far too hot inside this heavy costume, I did my best to entertain them. I didn’t want to let them know that Barney wasn’t real.

In March of 1997, my wife, Mal, decided to go into business with her friend, Dianne Lowe. Both of them enjoyed making their own hand-made greeting cards with rubber stamps and they thought it could be fun and profitable to set up at local craft fairs and shows to sell the products needed to make these cards. They contacted manufacturers and product distributors, set up accounts with several of them, and began to order product wholesale.

Their first show was at a high school in Clinton, Massachusetts and Cassy and I went with Mal, Dianne and her husband, Ken, to help them carry the boxes of product they hoped to sell. Mal and Dianne worked for almost two hours to set up their large display booth so that it would look attractive and inviting to potential customers but when the doors opened to let the customers in, there were no customers. The show had not been effectively advertised and Cassy and I were worried that they wouldn’t sell anything. Eventually a dozen or so customers came in and Mal and Dianne demonstrated how easy it is to make cards using rubber stamps. By the end of the day, even though there weren’t lots of customers, Mal and Dianne were both satisfied with the sales they had and they were encouraged enough to try other craft shows. It didn’t take too long before they picked those shows that were better advertised and attended and were on the way to having a profitable business together.

Next chapter: Adam buys his first car.

Part One Hundred & Thirteen

Although we all enjoyed our lives, my wife and I took our role as parents pretty seriously. We worked hard to try to teach our two kids lessons that would guide them through their lives in a positive way. Even though the income from my two comic book stores was substantial, we didn’t want to spoil them with lots of material things. They learned that they would need to plan and save to buy the things they wanted to have. Mal and I consistently tried to teach our children by example, so we would demonstrate and explain to them about avoiding unnecessary debt. Overall, both of our kids seemed to understand the concept of saving up to buy what they wanted but for some extraordinary large purchases that seemed as if they couldn’t possibly be obtained we offered to pay for half. So it was with Adam’s first car.

Our friend, Kevin, had decided to buy a newer car so he offered his 1986 Chevy Celebrity to Adam for only $600. Kevin usually took good mechanical care of his automobile and was meticulous about normal scheduled maintenance so we felt that this would be a very good first car for Adam even though the body of the car had quite a bit of rust on it.

Adam had gotten a part-time job as a cashier at a large grocery store in Hudson, Massachusetts and, up until this point, either Mal or I would drive him to work and then go back to pick him up when his shift was over. Several supervisors had told us that Adam was a good worker and this made me very proud of him. On a few occasions, as I shopped for groceries, I would watch Adam work for a few minutes and was surprised to see him acting like a “grown up.”

After Adam saved up his half of the cost of the car we drove to Worcester to pick up his first car. This is a big event in the lives of most teen-age boys because it really signals the beginning of their true independence. They’re now mobile. But along with the newfound freedom comes the responsibility of car-ownership. Insurance is mandatory in Massachusetts and it’s very expensive because of the “insurance-mafia” tactics of the liberal and inept (or possibly corrupt) government allowing no meaningful competition among insurance companies. Automobile maintenance and gasoline are also expensive, but as Americans it seems as if it is all an expense we’re willing to incur to have our own transportation. (In a related vein, I get a good feeling whenever I fill up my gas tank. I know I can drive at least another 200 miles without interference. Is it just me?)

Adam didn’t really enjoy working at a grocery store but he knew that he needed to have an income because he wasn’t going to handed money from his parents for the non-essential things he wanted. Since he was a junior in high school he also needed to start saving money for college.
My daughter, Cassy, was quite different. She enjoyed working for the things she wanted. At age eleven she created brochures advertising the services she was willing to do including babysitting and light housekeeping and went door-to-door in our neighborhood until someone hired her. It amazes me that two children brought up by the same parents can be so different.

Next chapter: Something finally makes me cry.

Part One Hundred & Fourteen

As a father, my relationship with my son is very different than my relationship with my daughter. As Adam got older I was eagerly anticipating his maturing to adulthood and I was excited about all of the possibilities that awaited him, as he would begin his independent life. Adam was very confident, a leader (rather than a follower) and he was always comfortable with “who he was.” He had endless possibilities and he was actually becoming an adult. I was not, however, eager for my daughter to grow up.

Cassy was fun to be with. She loved her Mom and Dad and still enjoyed being with us. We played card games, board games, and still wrestled together. Cassy was at an age when she still believed that her Mom and Dad actually knew what we were doing and that we were infallible. (Of course, we weren’t, but young kids frequently believe this.) There was no question; Cassy was my little “Princess.”

One day, as I was driving Cassy to school, I happened to be changing the channels on the car radio and I ended up listening to the ultra-cheesy song titled “Butterfly Kisses” by Bob Carlisle. I had not heard this song before and I was surprised by how closely this song paralleled our life with Cassy. When I was a young child, my mother would tuck me into bed at night and would give me a “butterfly kiss.” (This is when you flutter your eyelashes on someone’s cheek…like a butterfly’s wings) I passed this tradition on to Cassy. As I listened to the lyrics about a father watching his daughter grow up and eventually get married and move on, I found myself getting “misty-eyed.” When the song neared the end, my eyes were pretty “wet” with tears. Cassy couldn’t believe it! She had never seen me cry before. I explained to her how sad I was going to be when it was her time to leave our home to begin her new adult life. I’m sure she didn’t understand how tough that would eventually be for me. My little Princess was growing up too quickly.

If you’ve heard this song you probably know how “cheesy” the song really is but it has now become a “standard” at many wedding receptions because it accurately reflects the emotions of many fathers as their own Princess leaves the nest.

Here are the lyrics:
There’s two things I know for sure, she was sent here from heaven, and she’s daddy’s little girl. As I drop to me knees by her bed at night, she talks to Jesus, and I close my eyes. And I thank God for all of the joy in my life, but most of all, for butterfly kisses after bedtime prayers, stickin’ little white flowers all up in her hair. “Walk beside the pony, Daddy, it’s my first ride. I know the cake looks funny Daddy, but I sure tried” Oh with all that I’ve done wrong, I must’ve done something right to deserve a hug every morning and butterfly kisses at night.

Sweet sixteen today, she’s looking like her momma a little more every day. One part woman, the other part girl. To perfume and makeup from ribbons and curls. Trying her wings out in a great big world. “You know how much I love you Daddy, but if you don’t mind, I’m only going to kiss you on the cheek this time.” With all that I’ve done wrong I must’ve done something right to deserve her love every morning and butterfly kisses at night.

All the precious time, like the wind, the years go by. Precious butterfly, spread your wings and fly.

She’ll change her name today. She’ll make a promise, and I’ll give her away. Standing in the bride room just staring at her, she asked me what I’m thinking and I said, “I’m not sure. I just feel like I’m losing my baby girl.” Then she leaned over and gave me butterfly kisses, with her momma there, sticking little white flowers in her hair. “Walk me down the aisle Daddy, it’s just about time. Does my wedding gown look pretty Daddy? Daddy don’t cry.”

I couldn’t ask God for more, this is what love is. I know I’ve got to let her go, but I’ll always remember every hug in the morning and butterfly kisses at night.

This song may be considered corny and manipulative, but it struck an emotion I hadn’t felt or expressed for many years. I might be human after all.

Next chapter: Back to business. We are nominated for the prestigious “Eisner Award” again.

Part One Hundred & Fifteen

After our narrow “defeat” for the prestigious “Will Eisner Spirit of Comic Book Retailing Award” in 1996, we were all excited to be nominated again for 1997. Ken Carson, our employee with a talent for dealing with details, worked to refine our application for the judges to review. Not much had changed from the previous year but we placed a bit more emphasis on our successful retailing of “back issue” comic books in the information we sent to the judges.

Many comic book stores around the country had noticed declining sales of back issues and some had even made the decision to stop stocking them as part of their inventory mix. Our sales had actually increased because of efforts to keep as much inventory in stock as possible. We wanted to have at least two copies of every back issue comic book in each store at all times. Obviously, that isn’t always possible, but it was our goal. While many other comic book stores declined to buy most back issues, we’d pay a slight premium to buy any issues on which we were running low and we’d buy every comic book that was offered to us in a collection. We established a good reputation because of our “buying” policies. We didn’t just try to buy the very best of the comics; we wanted everything! As a result, we bought lots of comic books every week and became known for our great selection of back issues and that, in turn, increased our sales of back issues. We had the luxury of our huge retail space rent-free because we owned the building, so we weren’t too concerned about using the space to stock the slower selling titles.

Our successful marketing of vintage and modern comic books apparently impressed some of the panel of judges enough that they invited me to teach a seminar at the San Diego Comic Book Convention the week of the presentation of the “Will Eisner Award.” It was an honor to be invited and I wanted to share my ideas with other comic book retailers. I asked the judges if their invitation was a “hint” that I would be winning “The Eisner” but they refused to confirm it. I explained my reluctance to spend $1000 for airfare, hotel and food, and spend a week away from my family, and then be disappointed by losing the “Eisner” for the second year in a row. The judges wouldn’t give me a clue, so I declined the invitation.

As it turned out, I ended up winning the “Will Eisner Spirit of Retailing Award” that year and I wasn’t present to accept the award. I missed out on one of the highlights of my business career.

A few weeks later, after I received the beautiful statue and the award certification, I contacted the local newspaper in Worcester expecting they would like to run a story about this award but they just didn’t seem interested. I was surprised. The story could have been an interesting local-success-story. We had been a positive and dedicated local business that had now been recognized internationally for its achievements. This award was our industry’s equivalent to “The Academy Award” but the city editor just wasn’t convinced that this was “newsworthy.”

Next chapter: We go back to Nashville, Tennessee to visit our old friends, Gary and Peggy Walker, owners of “The Great Escape.”

Part One Hundred & Sixteen

It had been several years since I had talked with my previous comic book business employers, Gary and Peggy Walker, owners of “The Great Escape” in Tennessee. We decided to take a family vacation to explore Nashville with our kids and to rekindle friendships with our old friends. I called the Walkers, confirmed that they’d be available for a visit, and booked our travel plans.

When we arrived in Nashville, we drove around the areas where we had once lived while we reminded our children of our lives there before they were born. We didn’t have much money back in those days but it was a very happy time for us. We loved Gary and Peggy and enjoyed working for them.

We had arranged to meet Gary at his huge comic book, record, and collectible store in downtown Nashville so our children could get an idea of the incredible inventory that put “The Great Escape” in a class of its own. Gary introduced us to many of his employees while explaining each of their “specialties.” I was interested in this idea of each employee being “experts” in separate kinds of collectibles. In my store, I had always hoped that each employee could be trained to deal with all of the different products that we bought and sold but as our own inventory expanded it became much too difficult for any one employee to be able to know all of the information needed to be considered an expert. Gary’s success at “departmentalizing” his employees prompted me to encourage specialization of my own employees.

Mal and I and our kids spent the next day at “Opryland,” the big music-themed amusement park. Adam and Cassy loved the rides but because of their interest in musical theater they enjoyed the music and dance shows even more.

The next day, Gary and Peggy treated us all to “The Grand Ol’ Opry” with special backstage passes. Gary had some important contacts because of his involvement in the music business and we were thrilled to be able to see “behind the scenes.”

We were also happy to get to spend some time with our old friends, Ray and Virginia Sawyer. They were good friends while we worked with Gary and Peggy back in the 1970’s but we had lost contact with them. Ray remembered how much I liked rock and roll music so he pulled a few strings when he heard that “The Eagles” were going to appear on the popular “Crook and Chase” television show. We all had “VIP” tickets and we sat in the best seats in the television studio. Ray was very embarrassed when he realized that it wasn’t going to be the rock-band “The Eagles,” but a demonstration of real American bald eagles! I still get a laugh out of this as I occasionally watch the videotape of the show as these birds flew back and forth over our heads.

We had a great time revisiting Nashville and Gary and I got a rare chance to share business ideas with each other. I always learn something valuable from Gary.

Next chapter: A tale of greed and a lost collection.

Part One Hundred & Seventeen

I have a customer named Pete (not his real name) that I’ve known for many years. Pete used to set up at flea markets and toy conventions selling old collectibles, but he didn’t deal in comic books. One day, he came into my store and offered to sell me a lot of six 1950’s comic books including three sequential Batman comic books and three sequential Detective Comics, all in gorgeous condition. Since Pete had never dealt in vintage comic books before, I asked him where he got these.

He explained that his teenage son had regularly done yard work for a neighbor and that one day, in addition to the money he was paid, the neighbor invited the son into his basement to show him something. As they walked downstairs, the neighbor said he had recalled that the boy enjoyed comic books, so he wanted to give him something special. He opened up a steel closet unit and randomly pulled out the top three comics from two of the stacks. The neighbor had saved these comics since they were first published and he apparently had no idea how valuable they were. The boy expressed his gratitude and brought the comic books home to show his father. Pete knew that these were quite valuable and convinced the teen that he should sell these to my store because the money was needed more than the comic books. Because I had a good feeling that these issues would sell within a year, I was happy to buy them and made Pete a very generous offer.

I also told Pete that this collection of comic books could be worth a small fortune and that he should tell his neighbor that there is a strong market for them before he gave them all away to someone else. Pete agreed and said he’d do his best to convince his neighbor that he should allow me to make an offer on the collection. Over the next few months, when Pete would come into my store, he would explain that the “time just didn’t seem right” to approach the neighbor about the comic book collection, so there was nothing I could do about it. For some reason, Pete seemed reluctant to move forward. I offered to pay Pete a generous commission for securing this collection for me and he seemed interested but several more months passed before I saw Pete again. I didn’t want to pressure him about the collection but the thought that this amazing group of rare comic books could end up disappearing really bothered me.

Pete told me that he had actually seen the comics and he estimated that there were about 1500 comic books, mostly published by DC Comics, and all from the 1950’s. He wasn’t able to look through any of the stacks to see what particular issues were there but he was able to notice that most of the books on the top of each pile was a superhero title like Batman, Superman, Action Comics, Adventure Comics, etc.

I told Pete that he needed to be honest with the owner of these comics and tell him that I was a serious buyer. Without seeing the books, I estimated that the comics would be valued at a minimum of $10,000. If certain “key” issues were included, the value could easily be $30,000 or more! I suggested that Pete should offer him $10,000 as a minimum price so that the owner would know that he had a very desirable collection. Unfortunately, Pete got greedy. He figured that if I were willing to pay $10,000 for the collection, he’d try to make a low offer to the neighbor and then resell the comics to me at a huge mark-up. Instead of being honest with his neighbor Pete thought he’d be “clever.” Pete offered his neighbor $600 for the whole collection and even though the neighbor had no idea of the true value of the comics, the offer wasn’t enough to interest him in selling them. Now there was no way that Pete could make the man a fair offer without revealing his previous scheme to take advantage of him. I suggested that Pete should give me the neighbor’s phone number so I could try to buy the collection from him and still offered to give Pete a “finders fee” if I got the comic books. Pete (still trying to be “clever”) said he’d continue to try to find a way to buy the comics directly from his neighbor. As it turned out, Pete ended up with nothing.

A local comic dealer needed some carpentry work done on his home and he hired a local carpenter. When the carpenter arrived to start the job he noticed the comic books lying around and he said, “Hey, I have an uncle that has a bunch of old comic books. Would you be interested in them?” Within a week, the carpenter arranged for the other comic book dealer to view the collection and make an offer on it. As the dealer walked down into the basement, he noticed that the first comic book on one of the piles was a gorgeous copy of Detective Comics #225 featuring the important key first appearance of The Martian Manhunter, a character long-considered to be the first new “silver-age” superhero. This book alone was worth almost $4000! The dealer was able to buy the whole collection for a reasonable price and he made quite a nice profit on it over the next year.

I certainly wished that Pete’s greed hadn’t prevented me from buying this collection.

Next chapter: Our involvement in theatre.

Part One Hundred & Eighteen

The summer of 1997 was a busy time for my family. Both of our children decided to participate in local community theatre programs.
Adam went to Groton, Massachusetts for a second year of acting lessons while Cassy began a summer program in Hudson, Massachusetts. These summer programs consisted of dance, vocal, and acting lessons that would culminate in a series of performances. Adam would be in “Grease,” while Cassy would be in “Annie.”

After a series of auditions, Adam got the part of “Kenickie,” the second lead in the play. He was disappointed because he really wanted the main male role of “Danny” but he trusted that the director knew what he was doing. Cassy auditioned and got the lead role as “Annie.”

Both of these theater programs were for kids aged 12-19 and they required quite a commitment from both the kids and parents. The kids had to be there each weekday from 9 am to noon for the first month and as the big performance dates neared, the schedule of rehearsals got much more intense. Adam had his own car so he drove himself to his rehearsals in Groton, but most of the other kids needed their parents to drive them in the morning and pick them up after noon each day. For Mal and I, since we drove our kids to and from private schools each day during the school year, this meant that we’d have no break from this obligation of being a “parental taxi service.” We willingly did it though, because both of our kids had a passion and a talent for drama.

Cassy and Adam learned their lines and songs very quickly and made friends in the classes. This was a difficult time for Adam though, because his girlfriend, Meridith, was not able to join this theater group for this particular summer. She was enrolled in a summer theater, pre-college program at Carnegie Mellon University, in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, to get the teaching she felt she’d need to eventually be accepted into The Boston Conservatory. Meridith was no longer going to the Lexington Christian Academy with Adam and they wouldn’t see each other for the whole summer. This was a difficult decision for Meridith to make. She could spend the summer having fun performing with Adam, or she could sacrifice a few months of fun in order to get the education she knew she needed to further her dream of a career as a performer.
Adam hated being separated from her.

During the long weeks of rehearsals, the girl playing “Rizzo”
opposite Adam seemed to develop a “crush” on him. She frequently called our house in an attempt to talk with Adam. Sometimes he’d talk with her but he sensed that she was “after” him. Adam tried to maintain a good friendship with her but he just wasn’t interested in being anything more than friends. He knew he had to maintain a good working relationship with her so he couldn’t be rude and tell her that he loved Meridith.

After months of preparation, it was time for the actual performances. We invited several friends and relatives to both plays and we were glad that many planned to attend. It was a crazy schedule because the plays were both performed on the same nights in different towns. Since this was Cassy’s first lead role in a play, we decided to see all three of her performances and we planned to see two of Adam’s performances.

Cassy was excellent as “Annie” and her performance was very natural. The other kids were basically the same age as Cassy, but because she was very petite, she looked perfect as “Little Orphan Annie.”

Adam did a great job of acting, singing, and dancing as “Kenickie” in “Grease.” In fact, after one performance, Adam was approached by a representative of a film company offering him a job acting in an industrial training film for a national chain store. The man gave Adam a business card and told him to call soon if he was interested in this kind of work. Even though we kept suggesting to Adam that he should follow up on this potentially lucrative offer, he just didn’t seem interested. It seemed as if he wasn’t interested in acting in movies or television anymore. His “passion” was the stage. As parents, we could only encourage him to try it. We couldn’t force him even though we thought it could be a great opportunity.

Mal and I were not involved in the running of these two summer theater programs but we watched how they were run and we would soon find a use for this new-found “education.”

Next chapter: We rethink our comic book store’s website.

Part One Hundred & Nineteen

By the fall of 1997, my son was now a senior in high school and my daughter was in eighth grade. My wife was a “stay at home mom.” I wasn’t really needed at either of my comic book and collectible stores but would occasionally go in to the Worcester store to work on adding our huge inventory to our website. It was our hope that our business would increase by selling comic books all over the world via the Internet. Every employee we had seemed to be already overloaded with work to do each day so the task of listing the comic books fell to me. I spent dozens of hours listing comic books onto the website and I only finished the titles that began with the letters A-G. It was my intention to keep adding comic books as the months went on.

Most of us were either novices or almost useless when it came to computers so we assigned the task of dealing with any email that our website generated to one of our young, computer skilled employees. He seemed to enjoy being our “Internet guy.”

We began to advertise our website in a couple of comic book-related publications and eventually we started to get some orders. It certainly wasn’t the “flood” of orders we were expecting though. Very few orders came from the United States but we did get quite a few from countries like Japan, Brazil, and Finland. The foreign collectors were mostly buying inexpensive and common back issues of “Groo The Wanderer” so our sales still didn’t justify the expense of running our website. I decided to stop listing the run-of-the-mill inexpensive comics and start listing our expensive “display” comics. It would take the same amount of time to list a fifty cent comic as it did to list a $300 comic book and I hoped the website visitors would jump at the opportunity to buy some nice, expensive vintage “Spider-Man” or “Batman” comics. Then our website would have a chance to be profitable. But even after almost all of our most expensive comics were listed, the orders still didn’t come in. Discouraged, I slowed down my efforts to get every comic book we had onto the website.

One day when I happened to go into the store, I checked the store’s incoming email file and noticed that we had an order from a foreign collector for a few old “Warren Magazines” that I had listed. The order had come in almost two weeks ago and, for some reason, our “Internet guy” had not taken the time to process the order. This gave me a chance to explain to this employee what I perceived to be the common thinking of most Internet users. When they send an email they are expecting an almost immediate reply! Internet customers tend to get upset if you take more than twenty-four hours to respond to their email. My employee understood and contacted this potential new customer, apologized for the delay, and let him know that the magazines he wanted were available if he still wanted them. The customer responded and also emailed us a large “want list” of other magazines he was looking to buy. The total sale ended up being over $600. We could have lost this sale if I hadn’t noticed this unanswered email.

Our “Internet guy” pledged to do a better job at keeping up with the email, but with all of his other responsibilities he was stretched to the limit. We soon realized that we didn’t have any other employee as computer-skilled to assign to the task of managing the website. After several more months we determined that we just weren’t doing a decent job of handling our Internet operation. We decided that we’d rather not spend the time necessary to manage the website if we couldn’t be great at it. It would be unfair to our new customers if we weren’t able to provide a fast, reliable service. We eventually removed our product from the website but continued to use the site for advertising and as a source of current information about the events at our stores. We’ve been able to keep up with this because of the effort of several dedicated employees over the years.

My wife, Mal, had been successfully selling rubber stamps and supplies at craft fairs with her friend Dianne. One day in October of 1997, while they were sitting at our kitchen table writing up an order for stamps and supplies, I urged them to consider opening a full-time store. It didn’t take much convincing because they both knew that they had the skills and knowledge to make a full-time store work. Their main concern was that they didn’t want to sign a long-term lease on a store location just in case the store wasn’t profitable. I suggested that they could open their store inside my Fitchburg store. This store had a large “backroom” that we used for storage of extra product and with a little bit of work we could free up some space for Mal and Dianne to set up their new business. This way, they could try having a full-time store without paying any rent.

Dianne’s husband, Ken, had carpentry skills and he did all of the construction work of moving walls and creating an attractive space for the women to arrange their product. Mal and Dianne ordered lots of new product and had it shipped quickly so that they could be open for business soon. They got all of the required permits, business licenses, separate telephone line, and had a sign painted and installed outside to advertise the new “Vineyard Stamp Company.” I supplied an extra cash register I wasn’t using at the store and a few odds and ends that they’d need to get started. Since their store was actually inside of my store, they wouldn’t need to pay for heat or air conditioning. I was already paying for that. There was a separate heater for my “backroom” that wasn’t working so they paid to get it repaired. “The Vineyard Stamp Company” opened for business on November 1st, 1997.

I’m sure some people thought it was strange to have this “store-within-a-store” but it was as close to a risk-free experiment for Mal and Dianne as was possible and I also believed that both of us would benefit from the arrangement. Their business would attract more women to our location and the women would tell their male friends and relatives about our unusual inventory of sports memorabilia, comic books, toys and collectibles. This could eventually increase our store sales. I also believed that many of our customers would be interested, or know someone who’d be interested, in all of the craft products that Mal and Dianne were selling.

With some well-placed and inexpensive advertising they quickly began to build up a steady customer base. They decided to teach classes and charged a nominal fee to cover the cost of the materials that would be used in the class. Sales increased each week and were especially good on the days that Mal or Dianne taught classes on how to create the beautiful hand-made greeting cards. They realized that most of the “students” in the classes would want to purchase the items used during the class so they could duplicate the same cards when they got home.
“The Vineyard Stamp Company” became a successful and profitable business very quickly. But what was originally conceived as a fun opportunity for Mal and Dianne to work together and share their passion for “rubber-stamping” with others, now became a real job. They both were now committed to running a real business. One, or both of them, needed to be at the store to be open for business six days a week.

After many years of not working outside of the home, Mal didn’t enjoy this new commitment. She especially hated making the thirty-minute drive in the snow throughout the winter while I stayed, warm and comfortable, at home. Mal also realized that when summer came, she’d have to be at the store alone each day because Dianne spent each summer on Martha’s Vineyard and was going to be unable to help Mal cover the store. So, after seven months of business, Mal and Dianne agreed to close their store.

I made Mal and Dianne an offer to purchase the balance of the leftover inventory because I hoped that we could keep their customers coming in to our store to spend money. Unfortunately, without skilled salespeople willing to demonstrate the craft of card-making, sales on these products plummeted. The male employees of our Fitchburg store just were not interested in these products. We ran a big, half-price sale and sold off quite a bit of the inventory. After a few more months, the employees just packed up what was left into boxes and stored them in our backroom. This inventory would become useful again soon, but not for us.

Next chapter: Big decisions to make about Adam’s college and Cassy’s high school.

Part 100 - 109

2009-12-07T08:46:00.005-08:00

Part One Hundred

Mal and I, along with our two kids, had just spent a week in England with my sister’s family, then a week alone in Paris (including a trip to Euro Disney, now renamed Disneyland Paris) then we finished this great vacation with another week at my sister’s rented home in Windsor, England. My sister’s husband, Greg, took some time off from his work to introduce us to some local places of interest including the Windsor Horse Racing Track, The Chesington Amusement Park, and the famous “white cliffs of Dover.” These white cliffs are actual cliffs that contained part of the World War Two English command headquarters. This underground system of tunnels, communications centers and war rooms was restored to illustrate how this actually looked during the war and it was a relaxing and educational trip. All in all, this three-week vacation was really enjoyable, mostly because of the hospitality of my sister and her family.

When we returned home to Bolton, Massachusetts, we began to prepare for the beginning of the new school year for Adam and Cassy. Adam was to begin his second year at Lexington Christian Academy. His first year went extremely well and he made friends quickly there. He was elected to be the sophomore class president by his newfound peers based more on his popularity than any serious “campaign promises.” The previous year he had his first serious girlfriend but that didn’t last very long. He began to be more interested in Emma, a classmate who was a good friend and confidant. After a short while his friendship became more of a boyfriend-girlfriend thing but it didn’t take them too long to realize they were better off as friends. Then came Meridith. She was transferring to this high school as a sophomore and it didn’t take very long for something to develop between her and Adam. Meridith was a good friend with Emma and when it was apparent that romance wasn’t going to happen between Adam and Emma, she expressed interest in Adam. Adam fell for her pretty fast.

Mal was still battling her Fibromyalgia and she was exhausted and in pain all of the time, but she was trying to continue on with her regular routine as much as possible. One day after dropping Cassy off at The Imago School, Mal was invited out to breakfast with Kim, an old friend of ours. Kim had recently lost a significant amount of weight and Mal was surprised to see her eating bacon, eggs, and cheese for breakfast. Kim told her that she was successfully using “The Atkins Diet” and she explained the low carbohydrate diet to Mal. Mal was excited to try something new to get rid of the small amount of “extra” weight that she was unhappy with. She had tried other diets and had only occasional success with them. If she could lose some weight and still get to eat some bacon every now and then, this sounded like it would be worthwhile to try it. She’d just have to cut out bread, pasta, processed flour, and foods that are high in carbohydrates. Mal bought the Atkins book and read all about it before she tried it and it seemed to make good sense. After faithfully following this diet for a month or so she found that she had lost most of her unwanted weight but more importantly, she began to feel better. It seemed as if the symptoms of her Fibromyalgia were diminishing. Some scientists believe that Fibromyalgia is caused by a yeast imbalance and this seems a likely possibility since almost ninety percent of the people the disease affects are women. The medical community has been divided on this disease for many years. It was sometimes called “The Yuppy Disease” because it seemed to primarily affect women between the ages of 25-40. The environment to which many women were exposed was thought to be the cause since many of these women lived in new homes that were airtight and perhaps the air they breathed was contaminated. I don’t know what really causes this disease but I know my wife began to feel healthier when she cut out certain foods.

Since I had decided to “retire” from day-to-day involvement at my comic book and collectible store I knew I needed to be able to count on a stable, regular income for my family. Previously, I existed by paying all of the store’s expenses and paying all of my employees before I took any money for myself. My “pay” varied from week to week. Some weeks it was huge and some weeks there would be no money available for me, but that was okay because I was a pretty good saver. When the money was rolling in, I didn’t spend much of it. I knew I might need it later. So Chris, my company manager, and I agreed on a regular amount that would be paid to me each week in a paycheck. This turned out to be about forty percent less than I was accustomed to take but I knew that it was very important to allow the business to be comfortable to pay for the everyday expenses and to have the funds available to hire the additional people to replace me. (Don’t feel bad for me, I’m still making a good living.)

We also had to deal with paying off the loan for our huge building in Worcester. We financed this building by taking out a mortgage on my family home so I wanted this paid off. Each month, since 1992, we had paid an extra amount over and above our required mortgage. Some months it was only an extra one thousand dollars, but sometimes we paid an extra five thousand dollars directly to the principal loan amount and by the beginning of 1996 we had paid off the entire loan. It’s a liberating feeling to be free from the nagging obligation of loans.

Next chapter: Chris, the store manager, books a great line-up of sports celebrities as guests at the stores.

Part One Hundred & One

Chris, the manager of my Worcester store and overall company manager now that I was “retired” from active involvement, knew that he needed to keep the gross sales increasing each year at both of our stores. Through a mutual friend he arranged to have the first Boston Patriots football quarterback, Babe Parillo, come to our store as a guest. This was a modest success and it inspired Chris to try more sports celebrities. In the meantime, I had learned that Boston Celtics’ great, Dennis Johnson, had a son who attended the same high school as my son, Adam. I asked Dennis if he’d be interested in spending a day at my Worcester store and he said he’d possibly consider it if we’d be willing to donate his usual fee to a charity of his choice. I explained to him that it was our current “policy” to offer free autographs to our customers so his usual fee had to be reasonable enough so that I could financially justify it. I relayed this information to Chris and let him “run with it.” After several phone calls to Dennis Johnson, it was decided that he’d be our guest on Saturday June 15, 1996. I was disappointed because I had already booked a family vacation cruise for this same date and it would be the first big event at the store that I would be unable to attend, but it was the only convenient date for Dennis Johnson and I had confidence that Chris and the rest of our staff could handle this without me.

Our staff wanted this to be a big event and worked together to make it so.A connection was made with the local sports-talk radio station and they agreed to do a “live-remote” from our store during Dennis Johnson’s appearance. Someone in our organization got the idea to contact the mayor’s office to inform them of this exciting event for the fans of the area and since we were allowing everyone to get Dennis’s autograph at no cost, the city government decided to assist us to make this event even bigger. The mayor agreed to send a representative to our store on the day of the appearance to make an official proclamation declaring June 15th Dennis Johnson Day in Worcester. Once the local newspapers heard this they were all willing to help us promote “Dennis Johnson Day.” The newspapers included our event in their calendar section and one paper ran a small announcement. We mailed thousands of flyers to the customers on our mailing list and our employees put flyers in everyone’s bag at the cash register. They also tried to make sure everyone heard about it verbally.

Chris knew that we’d have to try to recoup our expenses by offering the attendees an opportunity to buy some Boston Celtics items or photographs for Dennis to sign. Chris ordered Celtics key chains, bumper stickers, pennants, and basketballs. He also ordered hundreds of 8x10 color and black and white photos from a company that is fully licensed to print them but he wasn’t able to convince the company to offer a return privilege on the photos we couldn’t sell. These photographs would have to be sold for four dollars each for us to make a modest profit and we were not sure that our customers would be willing to spend that much since they were used to our normally lower prices. Our previous events had much cheaper photographs available because the other celebrities didn’t care if the photographs were officially licensed. We worried that our customers would think we were just being greedy so we decided to give a portion of all of the proceeds to “Sports Alive,” a local charity that promoted athletics and educational programs in Worcester’s schools and neighborhoods. Chris also arranged for “Fleer,” a large trading card company, to donate lots of basketball cards for us to give away to everyone who attended this event. Everything seemed to be under control and it was almost all arranged without much involvement by me. My key employees, Chris, Ken and Dave paid close attention to all of the details and they were prepared to handle this guest appearance.

I was on a cruise while this event was going on at my store but as soon as the cruise ship docked in St. Thomas I began calling Chris to see how everything was going. I kept getting a busy signal. I continued to dial the phone number, over and over again, for almost two hours! Who could possibly be on the telephone for that long on such an important day?! I finally got through to the store after the event was over and found out that the sports-talk radio station “took over” our only phone line to broadcast the appearance from our store. It was a major detail that none of us had anticipated and I’m sure that it disrupted our business and probably frustrated many people who were trying to contact our store to ask questions about this event.

Chris explained that things had gone fairly smoothly. The customers enjoyed it (especially the free autographs) and we sold enough stuff to pay for all of the expenses. Chris was smart enough to have Dennis Johnson autograph a few hundred of the unsold photographs that we would have been stuck with so that sometime in the future we might recoup some additional funds. These signed photos would also be good to have available for the customers who couldn’t make it to the store for the actual event. We sold dozens of them over the next few months.

Later, when I ran into Dennis Johnson at my son’s high school, he told me that my employees had done a nice job and he was pleased with how everything went. He was honored to have the mayor declare that day as “Dennis Johnson Day.”

Next chapter: A look into my character…not too pleasant.

Part One Hundred & Two

I like to think I’m not complex but I know I’m not really simple. I’m eccentric in many ways and I don’t do things that most “normal” people do. I’ve spent most of my life doing things in ways that seem contrary to the current trends. My business accountants tried to encourage me to use other people’s money by borrowing money from a bank to expand my business. I didn’t want to do it that way. I expanded my business only as sales allowed me to do so. I wasn’t comfortable taking risks with the future of my comic book stores. I have a responsibility to the many employees and their families to keep this business profitable. Slow and steady growth was my plan.

I was also unconventional in my home life. My wife and I tried carefully to plan most of the major events in our lives, especially children. We waited almost six years before we had children so we could get to know each other without the stress that children may bring to a relationship. Once we had kids, we wanted to raise them in a loving environment. I didn’t like the way many other parents let their kids control the whole family life. Many of these parents stopped enjoying a social life because they thought the kids couldn’t be quiet and they’d only be able to sleep in their own beds. I believe that children are flexible and adaptable. We brought our kids almost everywhere we went and when it was time for them to sleep, they’d just lie on a blanket on the floor and fall asleep. Mal always brought blankets, books, paper, crayons, and toys to keep the kids quiet at get-togethers. They learned that there were times that it wasn’t appropriate to speak. We taught them to behave in restaurants. My kids were almost always well behaved. We also taught them to have fun and there was usually lots of laughter in our family.

Laughter was one of the few emotions that I was comfortable expressing although I was capable of experiencing other emotions. If I watched a sad movie, I’d realize that it was sad but I was never moved to cry. In fact, I hadn’t cried since I was a young teenager. My wife, Mal, was very emotional and she had no problem crying. Cassy occasionally cried. Adam had a very sensitive side and he had no problem expressing it. When he was a sophomore in high school he learned of a schoolmate who had been involved with some drug use. It bothered Adam so much that he and a few other students went to her, Bible in his hand, to pray with her. He cried when it was apparent that she was going to continue using the illegal drugs.

Unfortunately, I had no reservation when it came to expressing anger. It didn’t take much for my anger to build up and explode in a rage. Although I know it wasn’t true, it seemed as if Adam was deliberately trying to irritate me. He was a great kid; well-behaved, courteous, intelligent, loving, out-going and funny, and I was proud of him; but there was friction between us because he didn’t always do things the way I thought they should be done. Adam was almost never disrespectful to me but he’d just say something “wrong” and it would trigger my anger. I’d end up screaming at him. Adam never yelled back at me. He’d just listen to me and when I really hurt his feelings he would cry. It was really a problem with me, not with Adam. I rationalized that I wanted “the best” for Adam and I thought it could be achieved only by doing things my way. Mal loved Adam, unconditionally, while I wanted Adam to accomplish certain things as he got older because that was my plan. I wanted to control him and guide him to be what I wanted him to be. I was wrong to impose my plans on him. I needed to be there to guide him as a parent should, but I certainly wish I hadn’t been so hard on him. Somehow, I did have patience when it came time to teach Adam how to drive a car. I’d heard from other parents how tense this could be but I really enjoyed this whole process. I was delighted that Adam was becoming an adult and I was glad to be a part of his life during this time. Adam always knew I loved him even after one of my “screaming angry attacks” and within a short while, we’d be laughing about something together that only the two of us shared with our bizarre sense of humor.

Cassy, on the other hand, was Daddy’s little princess. She was adorable and fun to be around. It seemed as if there was nothing that she could possibly do to upset me. Before I retired from day-to-day involvement in my comic book stores, I’d come home from work to be greeted with joy by Cassy. She would run to me and jump into my arms exclaiming, “Daddy’s home!” Adam would also come running to me. This continued for years until one day when Adam was about twelve years old and Cassy was eight, I came home in a grumpy mood and snapped at them, “Please just give me a minute before you jump on me! I’ve had a rough day!” I know I hurt their feelings because they were rarely so excited to see me come home after that night. As a parent, I should have known better. What could be more important than expressing and receiving love from your children?

Both of my kids loved to act and they performed in plays every year beginning in the first grade at The Imago School. In 1996, as a sophomore in high school, his girlfriend, Meridith, convinced Adam to get involved with a local community theater group for teens that she had been involved with for many years. Adam auditioned and got the part of “Nathan Detroit” in “Guys and Dolls” opposite Meridith as “Adelaide.” As the lead male comic character, Adam was fantastic. He danced, sang and acted as well as any of the other actors in the theater group. Now, you may think that I was impressed mostly because he was my son but the opposite is true. I was highly critical of my kid’s performances. I thought it was better to be honest with them rather than praise less than good performances. If they asked me how I thought they did, I’d tell them the truth. They knew I didn’t “praise” everything they did, like some parents did, unless I thought it was above average. Usually, both Adam and Cassy did a great job when they were on stage. They were always prepared and their “delivery” of the lines was very natural, as if they were saying them, not merely repeating lines they had memorized. Cassy had major parts in her seventh and eighth grade school plays of “Tom Sawyer” and “Wagon Wheels West” and she showed that she had the dedication and skills needed to be a talented actress. I was proud of both of them and Mal and I attended every performance.

Now that I had been retired for a while, I found that I was missing the interaction with my friends and customers from the stores. I guess I enjoyed the attention I got from them. I was once known all around the country as an expert and a leader in the comic book business while I worked with my old partner, Jay, at “Sparkle City Comics.” We really dominated the comic book conventions in the late 1970’s and we were very influential in the pricing trends of that time. We worked as advisors to the comic book price guide and provided important sales information. In the small world of comic books we were famous (or infamous) but when we split up, Jay got the convention part of the business and I got the store. I no longer had to travel forty weeks each year and I could establish relationships with my local customers in a way that couldn’t happen when you’re in a different city almost every week on the convention circuit. But I was no longer important as a “national” comic book guy. I realized that I missed that bit of recognition. I came up with an idea that could give me national recognition again.

I called Ken, one of my most trusted employees, and asked him to find out what it would take to have us nominated for the prestigious “Will Eisner Spirit of Retailing” award for excellence in the comic book business. Ken tackled this task with his usual enthusiasm and attention to detail.

Next chapter: The hoops we were put through.

Part One Hundred & Three

After over fifteen years of operating my comic book and collectible stores in Worcester and Fitchburg, Massachusetts, I missed the national recognition that I had enjoyed in my time with Jay Maybruck as “Sparkle City Comics.” We were known all over the country as the dealers with the best inventory in the comic book business. Our customers loved us and frequently our competing comic dealers hated us because we “monopolized”
most of the retail business at the comic book conventions. We were really good at what we did and we were industry leaders. I wanted national recognition again for two reasons. I wanted it for my own ego and I also knew that I could create publicity that would increase awareness of the stores and ultimately, increase our sales. The most prestigious award that was available in the comic book business was “The Will Eisner Spirit Of Comic Retailing Award,” named for comic book artist, writer, and genius, Will Eisner, and I wanted to win this award.

Although all of my employees have strong points, Ken Carson was the right man to tackle this huge task. He got to work right away and within a short time he got us nominated for “The Eisner.” That was the easy part. Now we had to convince the panel of judges that we deserved to win this. We were required to submit documentation about our physical location and the quality of our store image, our inventory, our support of small and innovative publishers, our community activity, our customer service policies, and more. Ken wrote:

Good Retailing Practices:

“That’s Entertainment has developed a strong presence in a number of collectibles areas, including sports cards and autographed memorabilia, Japanese toys and animation, model kits, and role-playing games. These product lines draw a reliable and enthusiastic group of primarily male customers in the 12-50 year old range.

“In the area of sports cards and autographed memorabilia, That’s Entertainment has carefully cultivated a reputation for integrity. We’ve had all of our displays custom-built to properly showcase the high-end items. Sports card packs are a natural compliment to the rarer cards and autographed items, and often serve as an affordable entry-level collectible for younger fans.

“Japanese popular culture has grabbed the attention of high school and college-age customers, with many gathering large collections of imported animation and figures. We maintain several direct accounts to keep hard-to-find items available.

“Role-playing games have likewise appealed to young people seeking new and challenging forms of entertainment. A recent innovation that has come to the fore is the collectible role-playing card game, with “Magic:
The Gathering” the genre leader. “Magic” has enjoyed extensive media attention in the past months and That’s Entertainment has been involved from the beginning.

“Comic books remain our number one product line. Our new comic racks are impossible to show in one photo; they stretch over 100 feet along the walls, displaying somewhere around 1700 different comic books at any given moment. We “genre” rack (by subject) to put the small and large publishers on the same footing, and we order just about every new comic book released. Our custom-created subscriber database is not just a time-saver; it’s a tool that allows us to “link” new titles to established comics. Both “genre racking” and subscription linking quickly put even small press titles into the hands of readers who already support similar material, so they can check it out for themselves.

“Browsing is encouraged! We understand that a person has to open a comic book before he or she can be drawn into it! We promote a bookstore atmosphere, with employees eager to guide customers through the infinite diversity that fills the racks and bins. Give us a glimmer of a memory, and we’ll all get involved to track down that particular issue. If something sells out, accounts with several distributors allow us to get it back in stock.

“We’re proud to have many couples as customers, as well as some second-generation subscribers. Diversity within a positive environment makes this possible. We’re also set apart from other comic book stores by our constant and respectful attention to the innovators of the past.
Colorful and informative end-cap displays have highlighted the groundbreaking works of famous comic book creators like Jack Kirby, Wally Wood, Dave Stevens, Will Eisner, John Byrne, Scott McCloud for the uninitiated. We envy new readers the excitement of discovering such gems for the first time!

“The innovators of tomorrow also get shelf space at That’s Entertainment, with amateur comics displayed right alongside the work of the pros. The names of Matt Oreto, Memo Salazar, and Derek Ring are well known to That’s Entertainment customers. The rest of the world will have to catch up. We’ve had striking success lately with a creator-published comic titled “Monster” that outsold many major releases off of the horror rack!

Knowledge of retailing and collectibles:
“Store owner, Paul Howley, has been actively involved in reading and collecting comics since 1959. In 1973, he began retailing comics at the early Boston conventions. In 1976 he assisted in opening “The Great Escape” in Nashville, Tennessee, and he later helped establish “Sparkle City Comics”, then the nation’s largest convention dealer.

“Paul established That’s Entertainment in 1980, at a 2000 square foot location in Worcester, Massachusetts, New England’s second-largest city.
In 1989, he added a second location with the purchase of a financially troubled comic shop in Fitchburg, Massachusetts. Carefully balancing inventory, expanding product lines, and putting the focus on friendly customer service brought a doubling of sales within eight months.

“In 1992, That’s Entertainment, bursting at the seams, purchased a 20,000 square foot building in Worcester, and created a 10,000 square foot retail space, the largest full-service collectibles store on the East Coast.

“Along this route, Paul has acquired as much knowledge about collectibles as anyone, and each of us here has his own special areas of interest. These preferences come out in our displays and recommendations, many of the latter coming with a money-back guarantee to our customers. We all share the knowledge that each customer has his own tastes, and that listening is the first step in using our knowledge and experience. We also keep current in the medium with trade magazines, subscriptions to “On the Floor,” “Magazine and Bookseller,” and through study of the Internet.

“As a retail business, That’s Entertainment has grown into profit sharing, employee reviews, “Skillpath” seminars and training, and an annually updated handbook. We belong to the “Chamber of Commerce” and the “Central Massachusetts Employer’s Association.” In the competitive marketplace of entertainment, we are convinced that continuous professional development is necessary for exceptional customer service.

“Company manager, Chris Ball, was named “Salesman of the Year” in the small-business category by the “Worcester Business Journal” in 1994.
This is a prestigious award that validates our professional approach within the context of the entire business community. Among comic shops, our sales figures place us in the top 2%, with an increase every year, sixteen years running. In fact, sales are up 21% for the first quarter of 1996. We’re using computers to handle information about customers’
wants. We always knew that “keeping an eye out” for something special for a customer was good business, but the database lets us “remember”
more than ever, and to target mailings and calls effectively.

Community Activity:

“We take a variety of approaches to get comic books and our store name out into the community in positive ways. Paul has brought comics as literature into local schools through classroom demonstrations, and a store manager has spoken about comic books at several local libraries.
We’ve coordinated successful fund-raising auctions to benefit a local youth battling Leukodystrophy. Several times, we’ve played volleyball for “Easter Seals,” luckily for us, just participating makes you a winner.

“This year alone, we’ve aggressively pursued opportunities to donate comic books to libraries, a hospital pediatric ward, and a school excellence program. The local PBS TV station auction has regularly featured our contributions over the past few years.

“We’ve used traditional advertising in all media to promote the medium of comic books. The highest profile was a series of custom cable TV spots, but we’ve extended our reach (and budget) creatively with cross-promotions. We’ve had comic books delivered with pizzas, and made comics available to the stationary-bikers at local health clubs.
Theaters and video stores have proved to be natural partners in tying comics to the higher profile productions they inspired. We make displays and contests for all of them from “Crumb” to “Casper” to “The Crow.”

“That’s Entertainment rented a theater and gave away tickets to the first “Batman” movie as a promotional event and “Thank You” to our customers, and staged an elaborate funeral for “Superman.” Having stars Billy Mumy, Davy Jones, and Boston Celtics Dennis Johnson in our store for free autographs exposed literally thousands of people to our product lines. Comic fans also enjoyed appearances by comic creators Neil Gaiman, Michael Zulli, Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird, Steve Bissettte, Mike Mignola and many more. Throughout these events we’ve worked hard to develop and maintain a quality relationship with our local media and we believe that this has resulted in a positive effect on public perception.

Quality of our store image:

“That’s Entertainment is known throughout the Northeast for depth and breadth of stock. Other stores send in their customers for obscure and small publisher material, and dealers fill their “want lists” here.
Besides offering superior customer service, we take pride in being a “one-stop” collectibles store. Our sheer size and sales volume let us stock and restock all the best in comics. But if even we don’t have an item, we have refined our special order/want list procedures to a science. Our image? The place that either has it, or will happily get it for you!

“Full-visibility comic racks, custom built floor display units, product-line departments, newly remodeled register and office areas create a dynamic, open, bright and inviting atmosphere that is a browser’s paradise.

“That’s Entertainment is always taking steps toward expanding the appeal of popular culture collectibles. It is the genre we love, and even in a highly challenging retail environment, that fact is making the difference in our continued success.”

Along with the above information, Ken needed to have some “visual aids” to include with the package for the award judges to consider so he began to collect some of old photographs and articles from local newspapers. He also came up with the idea to enlist the help of two of our loyal customers to produce a short videotape movie about the store.

Next chapter: Memo Salazar, a gifted filmmaker, helps out.

Part One Hundred & Four

In our pursuit of the “Will Eisner Spirit of Comic Retailing Award,”
the comic book industry’s equivalent of the “Academy Award,” we needed to have visual evidence of many of our claims of excellence. Luckily for us, we had two customers, Memo Salazar and Aaron Banyai, who were talented filmmakers.

I had been involved in minor parts of two previous film projects of Memo’s; one was a very funny look at a local county fair and the other was a low budget, full-length movie in which I portrayed the owner of a comic book store (what a stretch!) My “big” scene was filmed in my Fitchburg store one night after we closed and although the finished scene was only about four minutes long, it took almost an hour to film. Although I was apparently snubbed by the Academy of Motion Pictures (and didn’t even get an Oscar nomination) it was still fun to be part of the movie-making process.

Memo offered his creative gifts to make a short video about our store. He filmed the store building, the displays of new product, back issues, and collectibles. He interviewed customers who were willing to give “testimonials” about our service and vast inventory. He filmed some of our key employees as they described their function in the “That’s Entertainment” hierarchy. In this video, Ken explained about our commitment to creating a pleasant shopping environment while David explained our philosophy of ordering new comic books and related products. I was filmed describing our combined decades of experience in the comic book hobby and business and our commitment to expanding the community awareness of both the comic book industry and our store.

Memo used a clever technique to try to convey the huge size of our store to the viewers. He placed himself on a wheeled cart and filmed while Aaron moved the cart up the aisles so the whole length of our retail space was apparent.

When Memo was finished editing, Ken packaged the videotape, all of the pictures, testimonial letters and documentation needed for the panel of judges. I was confident that this package would convince the judges that we were worthy of this award. A few weeks later I was contacted by one of the judges and he asked me if I’d be interested in organizing a retailer seminar at the San Diego Comic Book Convention (where the Eisner Award is given out) on successful retailing of back issue comic books. I was honored that they thought I could offer sound advice to my fellow retailers and I thought that, perhaps, this invitation was a hint that I was to receive the Eisner Award. I told the judge that I’d be interested in attending if I knew I was the winner but he wasn’t able to confirm anything for me. I wasn’t thrilled about spending almost $1000 for plane tickets, hotel, rental cars, and food, only to be embarrassed by the Eisner Award being given to another retailer. Since the panel judge couldn’t give me any confirmation, I felt I had to decline the offer to attend the award ceremony. In my opinion, it really isn’t “an honor to be nominated.” It’s only an honor if you actually “win.”

I’m glad I didn’t go. We didn’t win the “Eisner.” A comic book store in Australia beat us. I’m quite sure that they’re out of business now.

Next chapter: Ken runs a great new event: The Pro-Am Comic Jam.

Part One Hundred & Five

Ken Carson had an idea for an event to be held at our larger store in Worcester, Massachusetts. He thought it would be fun to invite some professional comic book artists to come to the store to interact with a group of amateur artists in order to share information with each other and the “general public.” Ken called this event “The Pro-Am Comic Jam.”

We all discussed the budget and the basic concept of this “Pro-Am Comic Jam.” Since this event was going to be rather low-key, Ken was encouraged to plan the whole thing by himself but he had access to any employees that he needed. I was confident that he was up to the task because I had witnessed his expertise when he helped us with other in-store event planning.

Although Ken knew that this event could be a fun experience for our loyal comic book customers he envisioned this as more of an “outreach”
to the general public. He publicized it through the regular media outlets as we usually did. He also wrote a separate “press release” and mailed and faxed it directly to the art departments of the local schools inviting the teachers and students to come to interact with these artists. He hoped that teachers would encourage their more serious art enthusiasts to attend.

Ken had invited and received confirmations from “small press” and local artists Derek Ring, David Tata, Andy Fish, Ted VanLiew, and Memo Salazar. Andy, Memo and Ted had done work for “amateur” comic books (called Fanzines) while David Tata had done some commercial artwork for several interesting products including a series of X-Men illustrated boxes of “Nerds” candy. Derek was a regular customer of my store who created a comic book titled “Monster.” He had copies printed locally and we promoted them to our customers and tried to keep these in stock at all times. It wasn’t very hard to convince comic fans to try this comic book because it had a well-written story with great artwork. When we would sell our last copy, Derek would bring in a few more. Within a few months it actually outsold most mainstream comic book titles including “The Avengers,” “Daredevil,” and “The Hulk.”

To represent the “Pro” part of this event, Ken invited Paul Ryan, artist of “The Flash,” “The Fantastic Four,” and “Superman” and Randy Buccini who illustrated comic books for “Dark Horse Comics.” Paul lived in Massachusetts and he was respected in the comic book industry for his high quality artwork and his ability to meet his deadlines. We knew he was very busy so we were pleased when he agreed to be a “Guest of Honor.”

By the morning of the event, we had no idea if it would draw a crowd.
Many of our regular comic customers told us that they either couldn’t attend or they just weren’t interested. (This kind of thinking always surprises me. This is a free event! If the customers came, they’d probably enjoy themselves!) As it turned out, we shouldn’t have worried about it. Hundreds of “general public” came and had a great time! There were lots of families; mothers and fathers with their teenagers who had some artistic ability that they wanted to share with the professional and amateur artists at our store. All of our guest artists were willing to evaluate and critique these enthusiastic young artists without hurting their feelings. Our guests were also willing to do free sketches for the attendees. It was funny to watch professional artist Paul Ryan get requests to do multiple sketches of Spider-Man even though that’s not one of the famous super-heroes that he had done in the comic book industry.

We had a few librarians come to the store to see what this event was all about and we had the opportunity to begin long-running relationships with them that continue to this day. Most librarians are eager to support programs that encourage reading of any type of literature, even comic books.

This event was a success in several ways. It was a low-cost way to encourage young artists, promote the comic book industry in a positive way to lots of families, and many of the attendees have been regular customers now for quite a few years contributing to our increased store sales. Ken had covered all of the bases.

Next chapter: Tragedy strikes my youngest brother.

Part One Hundred & Six

My youngest brother, Rick, was only six years old when I got married so we weren’t very close when he was really young but there had been a period of time when we got to know each other pretty well. In the late 1970’s and very early 1980’s Rick worked with me at the many baseball card conventions where I set up booths of cards to sell. Even though he was only a teenager, he had a good head for math and knew more about sports and the players than I did. It required long hours and hard work at these card shows, but we had a fun time together. But after Mal and I had our son, Adam, we weren’t attending as many card shows anymore and as Rick got older he got more involved in school, sports, and girls.

Rick eventually married his high school “sweetheart,” Lori, and they had a son, Jordan. Rick was a hard-working man who frequently worked over sixty hours each week at a physically demanding job in order to provide a good lifestyle for his family. They bought a nice home in a quiet rural town because they wanted to have a pleasant and safe place to raise Jordan. Even though it required Rick to drive a long way to work each day, Rick was willing to sacrifice a lot for his family.

In April of 1996, Lori was pregnant again, this time with twins. As they were preparing for life with twins, they were stunned when Lori began to have complications during her 19th week of pregnancy. She was hospitalized in Boston from that time on. During the 28th week of her pregnancy, it was determined that an emergency surgery was needed and Lori gave birth to Ryan and Tyler Howley on October 23rd. The two tiny babies each weighed only two pounds, two ounces and had serious health concerns. While Lori was on another floor, recovering from the surgery, the doctors told Rick that Ryan wasn’t going to make it. Rick held Ryan in his arms as he died. Rick then had to bring Ryan to Lori so she could say her “goodbyes.”

I couldn’t possibly understand what Rick and Lori went through during those weeks. Lori had been hospitalized far away from their home for nine weeks. Rick had visited Lori in Boston as often as possible and he also had to deal with going to work and keeping as much of a normal life as possible for Jordan. Some of us helped out by taking care of Jordan when we could, but much of the time, Rick handled it all. Now they had lost Ryan and Tyler was in danger. They also had to arrange a funeral for Ryan.

Although I don’t remember all of the details of the funeral and burial, I’ll never forget the intense look of sadness on my brother’s face at the cemetery. As I watched him live through this tragedy I wished I could help to relieve his emotional pain but I had little to offer him.

A high school English teacher had convinced me that death was just “part of life.” I wasn’t an emotional human being and death rarely surprised me. I still felt very saddened by the death of those people who were close. I understood why people would cry but I was unable to let the emotion out. In his time of need, I wasn’t a “good” brother for Rick.

Rick and Lori’s new son, Tyler, continued to lose weight and soon weighed only one pound, eleven ounces. It was a scary time for them as they waited for Tyler to become healthy and strong enough to be released from the hospital. Thankfully, he survived and is a healthy young boy today.

Part One Hundred & Seven

Although I was retired from daily involvement in my comic book stores, my life seemed busier than ever. Driving my son, Adam, to his high school was a commitment of at least a few hours each day (although it was usually a nice opportunity to spend uninterrupted time together), but it was a relief when Adam got his drivers license in 1996 and he began to drive himself to school. We still had to drive our daughter, Cassy, to her school but we had wonderful car-pool partners to share the driving. Both of my kids were heavily involved in the performing arts including voice lessons and acting in school plays and community theater. We loved watching them perform and we usually went to every one of their performances. Sometimes this meant seeing the same play as many as seven or eight times! We learned a lot about the whole theater “business” that would be useful to us later on.

Chris, the manager of my two comic book stores, called to discuss his idea for expanding our business through the Internet. He believed that it was imperative that we get on board and embrace this relatively new technology so that we could begin to reach the potential worldwide audience. He did his best to convince me but I wasn’t very interested in the new technology. I didn’t understand all of the details but I gave my “permission” for him to move forward to gather some information about the costs and potential benefits. Chris shopped around and came up with the “best” deal available at that time. He found a local company who would act as our “server” for $120 per month. This would give us unlimited Internet access, email communications, and they would build us a database program that we could use to list the hundreds of thousands of comic books, trading cards and toys that we had in our inventory. We all had visions of brisk sales to eager buyers all over the world. We were excited by the possibilities. Internet providers spent lots of money trying to convince consumers and businesses that we MUST be on the Internet in order to survive. We thought that this could “protect” us if sales at our store locations were to decrease so we signed a contract and began the process of becoming part of the “net.”

Meanwhile, our second store (in Fitchburg, Massachusetts) was becoming a frustrating experience for us all. Sales were sluggish (not horrible, but we were getting concerned) and the downtown area location was deteriorating at a pretty rapid pace. Fitchburg was a factory town with mostly “blue-collar” workers and unemployment was high. The Main Street area that was once filled with interesting stores that had been around for many years was now becoming a ghost town. There were dozens of empty stores. Social service offices, dentists and lawyer’s offices now replaced once profitable retail stores. The area became a hangout for drug-dealers and bums. It was becoming a dangerous place to try to run a business and the local politicians didn’t seem to understand the problem and they certainly didn’t have a solution. They attempted to “fix” things by spending millions of dollars on consultants to analyze the situation but the only solution they came up with was to beautify the downtown by putting park benches and small grassy areas with plants along the street. All this accomplished was making the low-life loiterers more comfortable! This situation really affected Richard, our Fitchburg store manager. He knew that it was increasingly more difficult to get new customers to come to our store because of the rough, downtown location. He did the best that he could with the situation but he finally called me when he couldn’t stand it anymore. He had to clean vomit from our doorway twice in one week and there was nothing being done by the city officials to straighten out this deteriorating downtown. Richard asked me to find a better location for our store.

I spent an afternoon driving around in some of the better retail areas of Fitchburg and found an empty store in a fairly big plaza on the busy “John Fitch Highway.” This store was previously occupied by a video game arcade and pool-hall. The owner of the plaza was happy to get rid of them as tenants because they made a mess of the store and they weren’t very reliable when it came to paying their rent. I just happened to discover this location a few weeks after they had moved out and the landlord was eager to have a trustworthy, new, rent-paying tenant. The owner realized that we would make a great addition to his plaza. I negotiated an initially low rent and although the owner wanted me to agree to sign a long-term lease, I was reluctant to commit to it so I agreed to a one-year term. It’s nice to do business with a realistic landlord.

The store was in bad condition so we tore out almost everything including the walls, ceiling, carpet, and lighting fixtures, and replaced everything. We bought many new fixtures and display cases and within a few weeks were ready to get out of the downtown area. After we notified all of the customers on our mailing list about our exciting new location, we relocated our entire inventory in one long night of work and were ready to do business the following morning. This move was made with no interruption in our business.

Next chapter: Ebay.

Part One Hundred & Eight

One day in late 1996, when I happened to be in my Worcester store, one of my favorite people, Zvi Szafran, came in to pick up the huge lot of new comic books that we reserve for him each month. As usual, we spent quite a lot of time trading bad jokes and talking philosophy. As I’ve mentioned before Zvi is the most intelligent man I know so I’m pretty sure I learned more from him than he learned from me. During our time together that day, Zvi mentioned an exciting new website he had discovered. He tried to explain to me the concept of this interesting new way to buy and sell collectibles through the Internet, but I didn’t understand how this whole “cyber-space” thing worked. We went up to the office area of the store and he typed in the website address of eBay, showed me the basic workings of this auction-based site and related a few of his buying experiences on eBay. I told him that I didn’t really have time to play with this right now so he “bookmarked” this website so I could easily get to the site sometime in the future.

Even though I didn’t yet grasp the importance of the Internet, I had just recently allowed my son, Adam, to establish a connection to the Internet at our home. Adam knew how to navigate his way around the Internet but I didn’t even know how to connect to it! After a while, Adam taught me some basic things and one day I remembered what Zvi had told me about eBay. I connected to the eBay site and somehow I figured out how to do a basic search for a collectible item I had been actively looking for over the past ten years. I typed in “The Man From Uncle Thrush Gun” and I was shocked to see that someone actually had one of these ultra-rare toy guns available in perfect, mint condition, still in its original box! The current bid price was only five hundred dollars.
This was “The Holy Grail” of “Man From Uncle” collectible toys from the 1960’s. After many years of searching, I was beginning to think that these guns were originally sold without a box because none had ever been seen at any of the toy conventions or in any of the printed toy publications.

I asked my wife if she’d mind if I spent a bunch of money on this gun set and she encouraged me to go after it. I bid one thousand dollars for it and I was still the high bidder as of the final day of the seven-day auction. I made sure that I was sitting by my computer when there was only fifteen minutes left for this auction and I was excited that I was still the high bidder. If I got this “Thrush Gun” it would be the most rare “Man From Uncle” toy in my massive collection. I waited as the minutes went slowly by. With only five minutes to go I was quite secure that I was going to be the high bidder at the end of this auction. Certainly no one would think that this toy gun set was worth more than one thousand dollars!

I decided to spend a moment or two searching on eBay for another item I was looking for. By the time I went back to check on the “Thrush Gun”
I found that I had been outbid and there was only one minute left before the auction ended. I quickly placed another bid of $1,100 but four other collectors outbid me within the final ten seconds and this rare toy ended up selling for $2,700! The “collectors world” has gone crazy!
Within a year eBay would become an important part of our business.

Next chapter: Chris, our company manager, gets Ty Law of the New England Patriots to be a guest at our Fitchburg store.

Part One Hundred & Nine

Since we had just recently moved one of our comic book and collectible stores from a deteriorating Main Street location to a much better shopping plaza, Chris, the manager, knew we needed to get some publicity to inform the community that we had moved. Chris had made a “contact” with a limousine driver who frequently drove football players from the New England Patriots. The driver was willing to act as an “agent” for us and he invited a few of the players to be guests at our new Fitchburg, Massachusetts store.

Since the football season was in full-gear, the only player who was available was Ty Law. He was unable to play because of an injury. Mr.
Law agreed to spend four hours at the store to sign autographs and meet the fans for only $500 plus the cost of the limousine transportation.
Surprised that he would be willing to make this appearance for such a small sum of money, we were thrilled to make this agreement. The low cost would allow us to give our customers the opportunity to get Ty Law’s autograph without charging any fee for it. We hoped we’d make our expenses back by selling our customers photographs, cards, football helmets, and footballs for Ty to sign.

My employees wanted this event to be a success but we didn’t have as much time to plan this as we usually did. Ty was only willing to come on November 18th and this only left us a few weeks to put this together. We contacted the mayor’s office and explained the situation to them and they offered to make an official proclamation honoring Ty Law and The New England Patriots football team. The Fleer Trading Card Company offered to get involved by sending us lots of free football and baseball trading cards to give away as prizes to the attendees so we decided to create an interactive event that we called a “Card Carnival.” During this “Card Carnival” there would be several types of games that the customers could play while they waited in line to get a free autograph.
Fleer football cards had a “secret code” area on the backs of some of the cards for that year so my daughter, Cassy, would dress up as a gypsy at a special booth to “decode” these cards to see if they were prizewinners. My father agreed to dress in a type of military costume for a game we called “Pack Wars.” One of our employees would dress as a fortuneteller for a game we called “Cardnak The Magnificent.” We also planned games of “Card Flipping” and “Card Tossing.”

As this was all coming together to be a fun sounding event, we notified the local newspaper and they agreed to write a story about it, mostly because the involvement of the Mayor’s office seemed to give it some much needed credibility. This wasn’t just a store intent on making money; it was a fun, free event for the community.

When November 18th arrived, we were confident that we were prepared. The store looked great when we re-opened that night two hours after we had closed at our normal time. Almost all of our Fitchburg store employees were there and many of our Worcester employees also came to help out. My wife, Mal, was there to help with “crowd control” in case she was needed. My son, Adam, couldn’t be there because he had commitments at his high school. Cassy was there ready to play the part of the gypsy. My film making friends, Memo Salazar and Aaron Banyai, were there to videotape the festivities and they caught lots of the excitement on tape.

A half-hour before we got ready to open up the store again, we were told that there were a couple of hundred customers already lined up outside in the freezing cold, eleven degree night. I quickly called the local newspaper again and told them about the potentially huge turnout.
They immediately dispatched a photographer and a reporter to get photographs of the waiting crowd and to cover the event because it would make a good local story. When we finally opened the doors, the huge crowd of eager customers streamed into the store. The noise level was very high with customers laughing and shouting as they played all of the games we had set up to help them pass the time while they waited in line to meet Ty Law.

Unlike our Worcester store, the Fitchburg store is a small store with only 2000 square feet so the store was really too crowded to allow the customers to shop for much merchandise other than the Ty Law photographs and other football items that we had displayed on the tables near him.
We needed to keep the line moving because we had certainly exceeded the maximum number of people that the fire marshals would allow to be in the store at one time. Although many fans brought their own items for Ty Law to autograph, by the end of the four-hour period we had sold almost everything we had available.

Ty Law had such a good time that he “put in a good word” for us with other New England Patriots players and within a few weeks we had inexpensive contracts with several other players. Adam Vinatieri and Ted Johnson agreed to make an appearance together in January of 1997 for only $500 each. Shortly after the deal was made, The New England Patriots won the AFC East Conference and the price for these players went through the roof; however, all of the guys we had agreements with honored their commitments. These athletes were all nice guys and great guests.

Next chapter: My family meets The Monkees again!